I just had a really argument with my ex.. :(

[Ebony_Mommy]

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[lozzi]

hey sweetie, regarding the dog, it was given to you as a present, so its your "property"

regarding the baby, long term he wont get custody, his court record coz of him being found not guilty wont affect. but judges always side with mothers on custody unless there is something drasticly wrong with the mother, but they do grant access, which im sure ur not against.

i wud advise u not to let him sign the birth register so then if he does take the baby its not a parent according to the law if you know what i mean.

just if he comes round hun dont let him in, if he wont go away after you ask him to leave *wihtout opening the door* then ring the police as its harrassment.

hope this helps xx

 

[Ebony_Mommy]

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[lozzi]

the court wud only give him custody if you were a threat to your baby, which ur not, ur a MORE than compatent gaurdian to ur sister and yes that will go in your favour.

its only when ppl are in danger of hurting there baby or the dad can provide a home if the mother was homeless etc, things like that...

 

[Ebony_Mommy]

ok... thnx

 

[lozzi]

men eh grrr


i think all use hormonal ladies shud come round to ur house and wait for him to come round

 

[rach]

hun i really dont know what to say but am sending you loads of and just want you to know that we are here for you xxxxx

 

[Mrs_Jay]

i havent really got any advice hun, but from what you've said if it ever went to court it would defently be in your favour. and i wouldnt let him sign the birth certificate so he has no real right xx

 

[gingerpig]

I dont know as I dont know the system at all, but it might be a good idea to keep a record of when he makes these death threats to you. I'm sure evidence like that would be very helpful in terms of decidng access and whether or not he should be allowed it. I know you dont mention access rights specifically in your post, as you're asking about custody, but you may feel it appropriate to deny him access or control is in some way as he is making death threats. If he has ever said anything to make you think that he really would kill your baby if he had access to it, then put that in your death threat diary too, I would imagine it's all useful information.

 

[roxanne080]

What a B%stard ..! I say seek legal advise..you do not want anyone like that in your baby's life..biological dad or not!

 

[Jaidy]

Sounds like your going through a horrendous time Ebony, I dont know really what advice I can offer to be honest but im thinking of you and if you need a chat im always here

 

[Ebony_Mommy]

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[hev&madi]

hun if he keeps threating you please dont hesatate to contact the police! thats what thay are there for

 

[Ebony_Mommy]

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[mum2be?]

Hi

This is a tough questiona and only u can decide but if this was me would let his family knwo when in labour and if they wanted to let him know then that would be fine with me but i would not go out my way to let him know if he had no bothered the whole 9 months with me

Good luck with what ever you decide to do

 

[Jo]

Personally hun, i wouldn't tell him anything, if he wants to know let him asj you.

If you are close to his Family i would keep them informed

He sounds like a total arse and i wouldn't give him the time of day,
I know it's gonna be hard for you but you must be strong, you so don't need him in your life

I agree with the others if he threatens you again go straight to police and keep a diary of everything.
you could prob get a restraing order put on him

Good luck

 

[budge]

ebony no matter what you do you cannot change your daughters parentage. Your ex is still the father no matter what. He has rights to see her and for your daughters sake you really shouldn't prevent him.
Not putting him on the birth certificate will not change the fact that he is the father- but he has to be there for his name to be on it and he will have automatic parental rights once his names on it.
Having said all that if you think he is a threat to you or your daughter and him having access will be detrimental to the welfare of you and your daughter then i would go and see a solicitor ASAP and set things right. Start charting everything down in a little diary. Things he says (threats etc) or does. If he comes round to your house and you feel threatened call the police and tll them. They have to act on it.
But be careful how you deal with this situlation. Don;t go hurling accusations about him out of malice. Remember you made a baby with him and now you have to do the right things by your baby. And if that means putting aside grievences so that she can have a relationship with her father then so be it.

 

[Ebony_Mommy]

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[Vicki83]

Aww Ebony, i really don;t know what to say to you hun. God, this is the last thing you need right now.

If you ever need to chat or just have a good old moan you know where i am

 

[budge]

budge.. i wudnt stop him from seeing her..

i just dont want him on the birth certificate.. just in case he tries to take her...

the exact same thing that im going thru now happened to my mum.

my dad took me away to another part of jamaica wen i was 9 months old. my mother didnt find me again until i was 2..

i cant let rthat happen... so to try and prevent that.. (or let atleast be calssed as kidnapping) i dont want him on the bith certificate

just don't put him on the certificate then. But i can't see how that would stop him taking the child. You need legal advice if you have suspicions of him taking baby.