how long until you will try again?

[Manvi]

swthrt.....i m really facing a bad tym.....i m TTC from past 1 yr.....my husband is having a low sperm count n dis was first tym i conceived.....n d day i test it was positive n same day i had MMC.....its been 4 days n emotionally i m feeling so low.....dats y i m desperately need one

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

sorry i wasnt trying to suggest that the pain of loosing your baby was any different sweetie at all coz we all cope with things differently, just reckon from a purely physical point of view your body is pretty good to go xxx

 

[Manvi]

sorry i wasnt trying to suggest that the pain of loosing your baby was any different sweetie at all coz we all cope with things differently, just reckon from a purely physical point of view your body is pretty good to go xxx

its ok dear....its same for everyone
after mmc....i m feeling low back ache,i m feeling sleepy all d time...dont feel like doing anything...i am bloating all d tym...is dat normal???

 

[Emerald rose]

After my son was stillborn i was
advised to wait till all the test results were back however i didnt listen and started trying as soon as i could.
I think its more about how you feel mentally. My sister also had a stillbirth and never had any more coz she was scared she regrets that now.

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

emerald <hugs> i feel mentally very ready to try again and to be honest i am not going to not try... if that makes sense. I want to learn my husband again and if a baby comes then GOOD!

I can't believe that i had only a few months to go and then it all ended in a week... horrible

I do think that the body suffers more trauma with a stillbirth than a miscarriage, they are very different and though we all deal with things different (and i would never belittle someones pain/journey) i do think it is very very different mentally too (i tried to say that as diplomatically as possible...

 

[kanga86]

i agree with u bigbump, i had a mmc at 11 weeks, but nothing prepares u for losing a baby so late on in ur pregnancy. u had a lot longer than i did to attach urself to ur baby, ur little girl. I never saw a baby on my first scan as they stopped growing around 5 and a half weeks.

as for the trauma that the body goes through actually having to deal with labour and a delivery, that is my eyes is far worse than having a mc.

The pain and grieve that we feel after a stillbirth or a mc, i think are the same as either way u have lost something u loved so much. having said that though i would rather have an early mc over a stillbirth.

I feel for u so much bigbump, and u amaze me with ur strength going through this xxx

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

i would much rather have an early miscarriage (i think anybody would) the 23 weeks of thinking everything is okay, the thinking that in just a few weeks time you are going to have a baby, everybody in the world knowing so you have to deal with the pain of telling people for weeks afterwards what happened.

Not to mention the labour ward, the delivery, the post mortem, the deciding what to do with the body... thats even before the grief of loosing a child that you have got used to and been told the sex of.

I do think though, that for someone who has desperately tried hard to conceive, a mis-carriage would be incredibly, almost unbearably painful. Mind you, so was this.

My friend spent a year ttc, finally got pregnant and at her 20 week check was told that there was something so wrong with the babies heart it would never survive. So she had to make the choice to abort her much loved baby boy

That is, i think far worse than what i went through...

I just think we all need to stick together, i dont think its the same for everybody i think we are all different and react to things in different ways. Its not about thinking 'my pain is worse' or 'my pain is less' because you cannot know unless you have spent time in someone elses shoes... its about just offering our support and letting it be