How are your OHs all coping?

[Hazel]

Watching tv earlier and baby kicked me in the bladder so I winced and DH had this complete look of panic on his face. I laughed at him and said I'm not in labour yet . He also admitted that when he's at work he's started to get worried about getting "the phone call".

 

[nickilubs]

Yaaaah I was freaking out earlyer because Pip was almost scraping the insides and it felt horrible! He looked so worried it was funny! He calls me "the very pregnant diva" and worries about me doing stuff like getting up too quick.

I really dont know how he will be during the birth he was near crying when I was being sick at the start and he has Aspergers so I think he will be quite on edge with lots of midwifes and people around and it might confuse him a bit which will probably end up me worrying more about how he is coping than what I am!

 

[abcd1234]

I've been told off many times for going "AGhhhhhhhhhh" then stopping and carrying on as normal!
I've tried telling him that chances are when its contraction pain i wont be making noise at first i'll just be going oh theres a funny pain, and the noise is cos she's catching nerves and its a sharp short pain which catchs me by suprise.

Oh and she also seems to be trying to scratch my insides out! Dave tried telling me she's trying to break my waters so she can escape but im not convinced!! It sounds so loud to me when she does it, im convinced others can hear it too

 

[kerryp]

i still think the whole situation hasnt clicked in yet with my OH. hes in no rush to do anything, never really talks about it etc he finds it cool to feel kicks but im sure hes not twigged that life i going to change. he asked yesterday why i thought i was going to struggle to get out of my pjs for the 1st few days once it arrives

 

[MagicMarkers]

lol same here dont think OH really goes for the who pander to the pregnant lady thing

He loves feeling the little kicks though, somtimes a sturggle to prise his hand off me stomach when i wanna roll over at night !

 

[fuffins1981]

Mine has not coped as well as I would have liked. He does not seem to get that I actually need support. And because I have had many problems and pains, he seems to have stopped taking any of them seriously!!

 

[Sandi4Paul]

mine is looking forward to all the good bits, but i don't think he has grasped the bad bits yet. Also i don't think he realises how much time everything will take.

Sandi

 

[Laur_250]

I think my OH is oblivious cos sometimes baby moves really strongly and it scares the hell out of me so I say 'Ow!' and grab my tummy when we're sat watching tv and he doesnt even ask me whats wrong!! The other day I was in the bathroom and there was a moth so I screamed really loud (they petrify me!) and he said he didnt hear me whe I asked why he hadnt been concerned!

Although i have noticed when i phone him for my daily talking rubbish he ALWAYS answers now whereas he could pretend to be busy so think he's ppeparing for the call!xx

 

[simhaz1]

Hiya

my Hubby is in a world of his own also but we have had 2 already and its nothing new to him now he not really interested in touching my bump now he has a little feel baby will move and he'll go ewe that feels weird and move his hand away

i do say to him how do you think it feels when babs doing it all the time can't exactly move out of way can i.

men have no idea.

you girls are lucky to have them that are really concerned.

bobsxxxxx

 

[Tadpole]

Mike is taking it all in his usual calm way. He was concerned at the beginning that something was going to heppen and still has a few worries I think on that score but on the whole is just excited and can't wait to be a dad. It's nice coz he isn't over the top about it - he will just stroke the bump with a big smile and has been a total love in getting me drinks and things - particularly now it is more effort for me to heft myself up off the sofa!

 

[Quill]

Mine has been utterly brilliant, although I think he's afraid of how I'm going to cope. On the other hand... I'm afraid about him coping. We make a good pair.

Nickilubs - does your local hospital do tours of the labour ward that your OH could go on? Sometimes a little preparation helps a lot with AS. Not meaning to butt in, just have had experience with Aspergers in the past is all.

 

[JoAnn&Aimee]

aahhh, I miss those days where i'd get a twinge and he'd go into panic mode. Made me feel so loved. Now he just goes 'what now?' while not even taking his eyes off the TV! Men!! lol

 

[MagicMarkers]

god just reread my reply to this thread, look at the state of those typos i should be ashamed of myself !!

 

[nickilubs]

Nickilubs - does your local hospital do tours of the labour ward that your OH could go on? Sometimes a little preparation helps a lot with AS. Not meaning to butt in, just have had experience with Aspergers in the past is all.

Thats one of the main reasons I want to have a home birth. He cant drive (co-ordination) and the hospital will be too far for him to be going because we live in the middle of nowhere and theres no buses. Also at least if its at home then there should just be us and 2 midwifes rather than lots of different people saying different things. He gets quite unsure around people he has never met and doesn't understand them.....they could be asking me something and he would get confused and think they were asking him questions. I also would be a little worried as to their reactions to him because of it and because he will be on edge it almost comes across as if he might be on drugs or drunk with the ticks and stuff I haven't spoken to the midwifes about it because he comes with me to the appointments and he doesn't like to talk about it with other people who don't know him because they judge so easily.

 

[Quill]

Ooh didn't realize you were having a home birth.

Yeah people do judge very easily, it's hard to deal with especially when they are judging someone dear to you.

I think you two will be fine and best of luck on the home birth

 

[MissSara]

Mine is amazingly calm one day and forgets i'm pregnant and then the next day he is all up and down and flapping around asking silly questions and getting scared about me being in labour and things.

Hard to work him out but we will see how well he copes in around 5 weeks.

 

[Mildly]

Mine can't wait and keeps telling me that I'll be fine during the birth! It is nice that he is so concerned about everything although I have lost serious muscle tone from not being allowed to lift stuff - even shopping unless it is really light!

Unfortunately because he is working over an hour's drive away, I am a bit worried about what will happen when I go into labour. He seems unconcerned though.

 

[x Naomi x]

Mine is not a happy bunny, he hates hospitals, feels queasy when we go for scans etc, cant even watch casualty on the tv, is a reluctant birth partner he thinks he is gonna pass out, and when i mentioned c-sections he didnt even want to talk about it, it freaked him out so much!

I have now roped in my mum as backup in case he really cant cope with it, i have been quite harsh and told him to pull himself together, but after seeing how he was when we visited his granddad in intensive care, he went white as a sheet and felt awful, i think i may have to ease up on him,

Otherwise he has been fantastic, looking after me when my SPD is really bad, reassuring me earlier on when i was worried things were gonna go wrong again, its just the birth that he doesnt think he will handle!

 

[mandspice]

Mine's pretty calm but every so often he'll say how nervous he is about the birth! We start antenatal classes this week so that should get him psyched up