Had a lovely phone call today..

[Dinkydizzy]

.. off the ultrasound department asking why I hadn’t shown up for my 20 week scan, you would think hospital depeartments would communicate with each yes!?

 

[Vintageling]

Oh god that's awful hun and sometimes the message just doesn't get through I always call each department I'm under when I have to update my information just to make sure

 

[Dinkydizzy]

I didn’t even think to cancel it myself to be honest, I just assumed they would, the lady was very apologetic but gah I knew it was today and was trying to keep my mind off it lol

 

[Vintageling]

Sending hugs xx

 

[SmithyBaby]

That's so crap. I specifically asked that when we found out at our scan the other day about our mc, I really don't want to hear about those things down the line. You would hope they would talk to each other and you wouldn't have to cancel it yourself but I guess sometimes these things get lost in the system. Sorry that happened to you hun x

 

[LucyR]

I’m sure the computer systems should be linked when I had my miscarriages they epau have always said we will contact the relevant people so you don’t have to. What an awful day for you sending my love x

 

[Dinkydizzy]

Thanks everyone, my doctor had it on her files without me telling her so I can only assume the ultrasound department didn’t look at my notes and no one told them to cancel the appointment? I wasn’t in epau or triage when it happened, I was in gynae so maybe that’s why? I don’t know, either way abit of communication wouldn’t go amiss lol

 

[Maximus17]

Do you know this is what I was also thinking today. I am getting letters about my ultrasound as well. Also I find that there is not enough support during and after miscarriages for example I had an operation and they discharged me and than that’s it. When you have a baby midwives come and see you and support you as well as the baby. I just think there should be more aftercare for women have miscarriages. I mean mine was an early miscarriage, when you think about women with late ones how distraught how sad they are. They are acting like it didn’t even matter...

 

[Dinkydizzy]

I was in Hospital for 3 days after I miscarried and I got plenty of support there but you’re right no one followed up when I was home, I did go back to my doctors myself though when I was feeling down and she gave me a number to refer myself for bereavement counselling as I lost my dad a couple of weeks before I miscarried. They also gave me as long as I wanted off work, I had to ask for it though, I’ve had no communication since then with anyone or any follow ups.

 

[Maximus17]

Yes that’s what I also mean aftercare is terrible. It should be there for women that need it. It feels like my husband got over it quickly but I didn’t. I am so sad still only been a week though. I am tired and I would love to have some counselling to talk about my feelings. Someone to listen and just be there for me. No one really thinks it’s that important as it’s was only 5 weeks old but to me I was pregnant with all the hormones and lost it just like that. And also the operation, healing physically is just too much to take in I am so scared to get pregnant again and than I want it more than anything but terrified something happening again...

 

[Dinkydizzy]

I have lost one at 6 weeks and 15+5 neither one was easier than the other so don’t let people tell you you shouldn’t be sad because you were “only” 5 weeks, the point is as soon as you know you’re pregnant you start planning the future and it is your baby, no matter how many weeks. Go see your GP and ask for counselling would be my advice. And grieve as long as you need to. I miscarried on the 12th of May and I still cry every day, maybe a little less every day but still everyday and it’s all I think about, my one at 6 weeks was 10 years ago and I still wonder what that child would’ve been like x

 

[Dinkydizzy]

I’m also ttc again btw and right now the thought of it gets me excited being pregnant again, but I know as soon as I see those 2 lines I will be a terrified wreck xx

 

[Maximus17]

Oh no 2 miscarriages I am sorry to hear that. I am terrified of getting pregnant again as I know I am going to worry but I just feel I can’t give up on TTC either. I briefly thought about it and to be honest I feel relief at first than sad about not getting pregnant again so right now not sure which one is stronger. I mean life would have been much easier if I didn’t long for a baby. I could just get on BC and get on with my life but I know I would regret not trying again. So many emotions right now but deep down I know I will TTC again even if it means worry. We are going on holiday for 2 weeks. When we get back I will see how I am feeling than decide if I need counselling...

 

[Dinkydizzy]

Yeah just take some time out to relax and enjoy your holiday and then decide after that, you will still have hormones all over the place right now and that won’t be helping with any decision making, I have had 2 miscarriages but I also have 2 sons so it can happen