Fertility clinic refersl letter ? Confused

[millielaura]

Maybe go on your local CCG website? It should say guidelines on there some places are higher than others . Its stupid isnt it! Xx

 

[snowbee]

Our consultant actually said that I had mc because of my weight. His actual words were, 'I see you had a mc, that will be because you are too fat.' (I'm a 14 bottom, 16 top depending on space for boobs! which I thought wasn't too bad and I was happy with my size before embarking on this fertility route).

 

[millielaura]

Oh my gosh thats awful! How the heck would that work even if you were 'fat' .. loads of much bigger women than yourself have babies that go to term. I don't think you sound particularly big at all anyway! I'm size 12/14 and I know I moan about my weight etc but I'd be so shocked if someone said I was fat or too big or anything. Size 14/16 is just curvy I'd say? I feel curvy rather than fat. Bet you where so mad! Xx

 

[snowbee]

I was so shocked I couldn't think what to say. I was just trying not to cry. He was a total arse, really rude to us both, went on for ages about my husbands occupation causing low sperm count then looked at our records and said oh that isn't a problem your results are fine. Then sent us away without answering any of my questions (cutting me off mid sentence or refusing to answer) and wouldn't tell me my test results other than saying they were 'as expected' and 'fine'.

 

[millielaura]

I think I would of cried! Was this nhs or privately? If it was nhs and private is different then I am so glad the nhs were rubbish with me and I booked private. It must be so gutting to go to a consultation and just be made to feel like crap! Thats sooo annoying about your results too. As expected and fine could mean anything from bad to borderline to okay to normal to good or to very good haha literally could of been any lol! Cutting you off mid sentence is so rude. I'd be so fuming to wait ages to ask these questions and then get cut off lol Xx

 

[FBTTN8079]

oh snowbee that's awful ! We also had crap nhs experience, focused on my weight, their limit is 30 & mine is 32, we found we had male factor but he ignored my husband, didn't even look at him or give him advice, told us we need ivf, nothing else explained, to go away & loose weight!! We ended up going private as our trust were just a nightmare x x

our friend lives in Hong Kong & has a good job, so is ok money wise, she is pregnant with her 2nd ivf baby & I update her with our bits & her consultant is one of the best & apparently says the whole weight thing is just not their maim focus, its not such an issue as it is over here x

 

[Trivita]

I have a similar story got told " well you know its your fault , its the weight " and then got told "well if you really want a baby , you wont eat as much"

 

[snowbee]

I would really like an explanation of how exactly the weight affects it but noone is willing to discuss it. I want to know how it 'works'.

 

[millielaura]

Me too!! It cant that much surely or people with a 'normal' bmi wouldnt suffer infertility? And they do.
Oooh it really annoys me. So so many people with bmis over the 'norm' get pregnant and have babies so why when someone is struggling to conceive do they not have a right to be treated because of weight!
Xx

 

[FBTTN8079]

its shocking isn't it ! To be honest it wouldn't surprise me if its all down to money and cost !!

 

[Trivita]

Fat peopleget picked on i think , i can see anything about bmi on my ccg ? Or and i being stupid , im in maidstone kent ?

 

[millielaura]

Some ccg's do say unknown i think. Did you find the treatment section? xx

 

[Trivita]

Yes , the only place that talks about bmi is nice guide lines

 

[Trivita]

Here is the link

https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg156/chapter/recommendations

 

[MrsS143]

You get slim people with horrendous diets and lack in every macronutrient there is and are total couch potatoes
But you can get people overweight or obese who eat really well (albeit too much of it) and get regular exercise

the person with some extra fatty layers is not the unhealthier of the 2 here!

 

[millielaura]

Thats so true MrsS!
In fact when I was a size 6 I used to eat absolute rubbish, ready meals, lots of alcohol etc. I maybe ate one meal a day which is how I was slim but it was very often just rubbish foods no veg etc.
Now I'm size 12/14 and overweight in bmi and I always eat my 5 portions of fruit and veg, never drink and my meals are always healthy. I do snack on bad stuff like crisps and chocolate in between etc but I must be healthier than when I was slimmer! I used to get ill so much and now I'm bigger and I'm hardly ever ill and I think its the good meals I eat. Yet I would of had no problems regarding fertility treatment when I was unhealthier. So unfair lol. I don't think my steroid asthma inhaler helps much either and I had to up my dose a lot since getting out kittens and they can sometimes cause weight gain etc. Some of it is my fault because I do like to snack and I should excersize a bit more but I think my bodier is healthier and more able to carry a pregnancy now than when I was slim! Xx

 

[MrsS143]

My hubby used to be really muscley
He didnt have a pick of fat on him
But technically he was obese!

 

[Trivita]

What i also dont get it say in the guidelines idealy a bmi of below 30 does not say must !

 

[millielaura]

Just got my letter after being re referred. Look like the finally listened. It says general gynaecology unit? Is that right??

 

[snowbee]

Depends on the hospital set up so could be under that department. How long have you got to wait