feeling really low :(

[kayzee]

Hello all you lovely ladies,
Dont know if you can help at all just maybe some kind words will cheer me up. Im pregnant with my third after a brief attempt at trying to rebuild my life after divorce, as soon as i found out i was pregnant the babies father left and said he didnt love me after all. At the time i was devastated and didnt know what to do but i love my kids dearly as any mother does and there was in no way a question as to wether i should have an abortion that just wasnt an option!! So on my own and with a few friends help i have decided to go it alone and am really looking forward to it now and me ex hubby has been excellent and really wants to be a dad to my baby as her own doesnt want to know at all I feel really guilty still after all this time that she is never going to now her family, somewhere she has 3 sisters and a brother I had a few texts of the father a couple of months ago asking if i would let him see her and at the time i said i would, i even spoke to his ex wife and the children and they were really looking forward to it and were going to come and see her when shes born and stay in contact via email and stuff but have heard nothing from anyone since and no replies to the lovely texts i have sent And to top it all this morning i have logged on to find she has deleted me off her msn now and thats the final insult as far as im concerned Im sitting here in tears upset that they are all persecuting an innocent baby, how the god damn could they? Now i dont know wether to even bother telling any of them when she is born or just cut them off all together like they have done me? Im just really upset and hurting that they could treat me like this, any kind words wouldbe much appreciated, sorry for the winge,
Take care all, love kaye.xxx

 

[Urchin]

Awww

This is totally out of order, and they are doing your baby an injustice, it's true, BUT personally, I would just leave them to it. The only people who are gonna miss out is them, it sounds like your baby will be just fine without people like that in her life to let her down.
Later, they will no doubt come crawling back and asking to see her, but for now, I'd ignore them and focus on you and the baby, this is a precious time, try not to waste it worrying about people like that.

xxxx

 

[lozzi]

awww sweetheart

im here if you need to chat..

at the end of the day hunny this baby is gettin the most fantastic mummy and brothers it cud ever wish for, who needs a waste of space father and ex wife anyway!!!

i kno what u mean about you want the child to know the family, but you cant force people to and ultimatly it will be THERE loss, your lil girl will have everything she needs from YOUR family. When she is old enough to understand she'll appreciate what she has got and she'll see those who abandonded her for what they really are!!!


im here if you nede to chat xxx

 

[skatty]

Kayzee that's really sad

Your little girl is going to grow up with a Mum and two adoring big brothers that are going to love her so much. Your ex hubby sounds like a very nice reasonable man even though you are not together anymore, that is so uplifting to know that he will act as a Dad to her as she is his sons' sister, that's just lovely

The ex wife sounds like a right meanie bitch but don't write off the children. I am sure eventually as they grow up they will want to know their little sister even if their Mum doesn't agree. If I had found out I had a half brother or sister I would have done all I can to be in their life.

Its totally understandable that you are upset but if they have no interest in an innocent baby then perhaps they are not such nice people to be in touch with anyway. Some people grow up knowing none of their blood relatives because they were adopted, at least your little girl will know your side of the family.

I hope you start to feel better! I find that when I am upset my bump definitely goes quiet too but when I'm happy she has a party inside me so I'm sure they can sense our moods.

Not long now before you will have your darling girl xxx

 

[cassi]

I agree with the others huni, she has everyone she needs right now around you, it is their loss just leave them too it, if you're ex hubby is doing that much, then let him its a lovely gesture and he will make a much better father figure to her than you're nasty ex! I have said this before, blood dosnt mean anything, it takes a man to be a dad, my sperm donor left when i was four, he was a nasty violent man, and in my eyes my real dad is my moms partner, i will always refer to him as dad, cause he did everything that a dad should and he was always there, that is a REAL dad. Trust me you're baby dosnt need people like that to let her down in the future, neither do you, you're better off without them.

Take care sweety

cas xx

 

[kayzee]

Feeling a little better today but think i must of been phsychic or something cos i had a text off baby's dad yesterday morning asking if i was ok and thats it! I havnt replied cos my solicitor says i dont have to have anything to do with him until the baby is born and then afterwards only if i want to unless he decides to get nasty and take me to court so he can see her Considering how he is and what he has done ie: want me to have abortion, not spoken, refusing to ring, not paying, told me its my problem i deal with it and said he didnt want to have anything to do with her, Do you think i should tell him when she is born or wait until he asks if ever!! ? I feel a bit torn on this one xxx

 

[Melanie]

Oh im so sorry hun, this has to be so hard for you. Its him that is missing out though, just remember that as long as you love your little girl and keep her safe you ate being the best mum she could ask for. Thats all that matters.

 

[budge]

aw kayzee i hope you sort things out and im sure you'll be ok.

 

[cab'o'holic]

If it was me I would wait untill he contacts you, you will be bussy enough with your baby girl. if he asks why you never told him she was born then just say you never got around to it with having a baby by yourself.
If he dosnt want anything to do with her then why dose he want you to let him know.
But saying that you will want to get some money of him! ask your solisiter for advice.

Good luck

 

[kayzee]

I dont think the solicitor can do much about the money side, but cos im living on, income support, maintenance, child benefit, tax credit and disabilty living allowance cos of my son, as soon as i notify them of her birth they are going to be straight on his case anyway. I dont think im going to tell him just wait for them to catch up with him and sting his sorry arse

 

[skatty]

Good plan Kayzee

 

[nikki1306]

good idea hun and good luck xx