Faking it??? :(

[confusedfella]

Hi,
I'm in a really bad situation. My girlfriend says she's pregnant and I'm really not sure that she is.

Let me explain the situation. We finished on Weds and the next day she says she found out she was pregnant. She'd been feeling a bit funny so we had done a test only a few days earlier and it was negative. She's on the Depo pill injection and says that's why the test was negative.

She says she found out she was pregnant at the hospital when they gave her a routine ultra sound (she's been having some problems down there for a while).

The reason we finished on Weds was because I caught her lying yet again! So how do I know that she's not lying about this just to get me to get back with her?

p.s. She told me she was pregnant around 14 months ago just after we'd split up. We got back together and she had a misscarage. Am I being taken for a fool? How can I be sure that she is pregnant?

 

[Londoner Claire]

I'd tell her as she has lied before that you want proof. Ask her to make an appointment with the doctor when you are able to go along with her. They can do a dipstick test there and then.

Sorry you're going through this, it's not nice being lied to all the time. some people really can't help it. I had an ex was the same and he said he didn't know why he did it.

 

[Sassyminx]

Hi,
I'm in a really bad situation. My girlfriend says she's pregnant and I'm really not sure that she is.

Let me explain the situation. We finished on Weds and the next day she says she found out she was pregnant. She'd been feeling a bit funny so we had done a test only a few days earlier and it was negative. She's on the Depo pill injection and says that's why the test was negative.

She says she found out she was pregnant at the hospital when they gave her a routine ultra sound (she's been having some problems down there for a while).

The reason we finished on Weds was because I caught her lying yet again! So how do I know that she's not lying about this just to get me to get back with her?

p.s. She told me she was pregnant around 14 months ago just after we'd split up. We got back together and she had a misscarage. Am I being taken for a fool? How can I be sure that she is pregnant?

she sounds like a bit of a fruitcake, if she is pregnant then it SHOULD show up on a pregnancy test, regardless of if she is on the pill or not,

id be very cautious and ask her to show you her notes, or her scan result, as she should have been referred to a midwife on the scan showing a pregnancy?

not an enviable situation to be in

 

[Alfiesmummy]

my opinion isssss (sorry beforehand) I think i smell a rat! It just sounds a bit too much like she knows which strings to pull and its sad that shes putting you through this i may be completely wrong and she may be telling the truth but as has been said if your pregnant it will show up on the test now it is possible that it didnt show up on the test because it was too early the 1st time but defineately just play it as you want to be involved you want to see appointments be at them with her dont tel her you think shes a liar just seem as if you want to be involved you will soon find out, my advice if she is lying, dont go back someone who can lie about something like that is pretty wierd really hun also was she telling the truth last time was she actually pregnant or did she lie about miscarrying?

 

[confusedfella]

Ok so I've spoken to her this morning and explained that as she's lied in the past I need to know for sure that she isn't lying about this. I asked her to make an appointment with her doctor that we could both go to. After a heated discussion she has agreed that in a couple of weeks she'll take another pregnancy test. Apparently even the test she did in the hospital came out negative because of the pill injection and how early the pregnancy is; or at least that's what she's told me. She 4-5 weeks and had a new injection of Depo on Monday.

That worries me to. If she was pregnant when she was given the pill injection will that put the baby at risk?

I don't know if she lied last time about miscarrying. At the time I believed every word she said and never questioned a thing.

 

[x-kirsty-x]

If she's pregnant the test would show positive, if she's not it would show negative - it really doesnt get any simpler than that

Get a home pregnancy test and get her to do it while you're there. That would be the quickest and easiest way to tell.

 

[cloud9]

It all seems a bit odd to me.
Doesn't seem to add up to me .

As far as i am aware it is fertility drugs that affect a pregnancy not the depo injection

 

[Hypnorm]

If she knows she is pregnany why has she had the depo shot, as theres no chance of her getting pregnant if she already is!
I doubt that the hospital woulds have given her a deop shot if they found out that she was pregnant, as it could potentially harm the baby, with all the hormones.
Something doesnt sound right to me why wait a 'couple' of weeks before she re-tests?

Theres no way to find out on her notes or from her doctor so it all has to come from her, you could always speak to your own doctor and see what he says - i.e if the depo shot would give a consistent negative result.
Could always ask a pharmacist they might know.
Does she have any copies of the scan?
You really need proof - it just all sounds a bit odd to me.

Hope you work it out soon.

 

[Hypnorm]

These might help:

http://www.babyhopes.com/articles/depop ... ytest.html

http://www.fpa.org.uk/information/leafl ... tentid=135

 

[Londoner Claire]

Yes it would come out positive by 4-5 weeks so waiting another two would make no difference. If she avoids the doctors, you buy a pregnancy test and make her do it with you there. She won't be able to get out of that one.

 

[Hypnorm]

"What should I do if I think that I am pregnant?
The injection is a highly effective method of contraception. If you have had your injections on time, it is very unlikely that you will become pregnant. If you think that you might be pregnant then you can do a pregnancy test or speak to your doctor or nurse as soon as possible. If you do get pregnant while you are using the injection, there is no evidence that it will harm the baby"

this is what it says on one link. nothing about it affecting tests.

 

[Alfiesmummy]

i used to have the depo pill too and it took 8 months before i fell pregnant after i stopped using it with no alternative contraception,

 

[Daggers]

This is strickly my opinion but I don't think that having a baby is a reason to stay together anyway, IF she is pregnant then obviuosly if are willing to support her (the baby) then advise her that is what you'll do but that you don't intend to let this change the fact the the two of you are no longer an item - chances are that if things ain't working out now then having a baby ain't going to change that, again please note this is what I would do so no offence to anyone else who thinks differently. So let the pregnacy roll on - if that is the case! But in the mean time I'd move on and not dewell on wether or not to get back with your ex.

 

[cassi]

im sorry but she is blatently lying how weird everytime you split up she becomes pregnant! miracle..in fact i bet she didnt even have a miscarriage before!

They wouldnt of given her the depo jab if she was pg end of! if she is 4-5 weeks then she wont be too early for a test to show positive...

I had the depo jab and after the 12 weeks it lasts it then took another year for me to conceive (it can take a long time for your body to go back to normal after the depo) ..

Id say leave her she sounds like a desperate nutcase, and why argue about going to the docs??? and if she really thinks she might be pg she wouldnt wait 2 weeks...

and what problems warrant an early scan if she isnt even sure yet, they wouldnt really be able to see anything at 4 weeks! ??? have you seen the scan picture then, id expect so..

 

[Melanie]

Yeah i agree with cassi, she sounds like a nutter to me.

 

[Alfiesmummy]

im sorry but she is blatently lying how weird everytime you split up she becomes pregnant! miracle..in fact i bet she didnt even have a miscarriage before!

if thats the case shes defineately a nut job in fact a sick nut job anyone on here will tell you that it is not something you lie about at all people go through this every day and it is heart breaking. im sorry but if shes lied about that then you are so much better off out of it. make her prove it becasue im sorry but she sounds like shes trying to manipulate you in the cruelest sickest way

 

[littlebump]

What an awful position to be in. At least she's been reasonable about taking another PG test in a couple of weeks. Being 4-5 weeks pregnant is only 2-3 weeks after conception so it's possible a pregnancy test wouldn't pick it up yet, though to be honest most home tests claim to detect pregnancy 1-2 weeks after conception so it doesn't really stack up.

I used to have the depo injection, and once I'd been a bit lapse about getting the shot and left it a week too long - the nurse made me do a pregnancy test there and then to check I wasn't PG before she would give me an injection. So this suggests there's no reason why having the depo injection should interfere with the accuracy of a pregnancy test.

Incidentally once I came off the depo, it was 13 months before my periods even came back. It is a very effective method of contraception.

Also, if she was pregnant why the heck would she have another depo injection???

Anyway, not much help, just similar comments to everyone else really. But I think you're right to be cautious here - as awkward as you no doubt feel about it, she's not really given you much basis to trust her word.

Good luck

LBxx

 

[Sassyminx]

not trying to confuse things, but IF she is actually pregnant, sometimes the hormone levels are still too low for it to show on a pregnancy test, i had 3 negatives with bethany when i was infact pregnant

 

[claireabell]

Hey there..
First of all I would like to say sorry you have found yourself in a bad situation when it should be a joyous occasion. As the other ladies have said I would buy her a pregnancy test and ask her to do one there and then, If it comes up negative then you make an appointment at the doctors for her and you can go along with her, they should have her notes if she's had a scan at the hospital. I know with one of my friends she did quite a few pregnancy tests with all 3 of her children and they were all negative....with her third baby she got a scan because she'd been having lady problems and they revealed she was at least 6 months pregnant and she'd been having periods etc...anyway don't want to go off on a tangent so will stick to your dilemma. If you think she would try and get out of the doctors apt then don't tell her and just take her along - you'll soon know the truth then. If she is lying (which it sounds like she could be) then I'd say leave her...I think it takes a fruitcake to say things like that. Hope you resolve your situation soon. Take care.....Claire..xxx

 

[confusedfella]

Thanks for all the responses.

I'll try and have another word with her about going to the doctors. Her reason for not going was that she'd feel embarrassed to go to the doctor she's know all her life and say "My boyfriend doesn't believe I'm pregnant so can you tell him". I'm sure she could think of another reason for us to go. Having no experience of this sort of thing I don't know of a reason so any suggestions would be good.

When she had the Depo shot on Mon she didn't know she was pregnant. She should have had the shot on the 27th Dec so was well over a week late.