Dont know what to do! Advice please?

[babyblonde]

A close family member has just had a miscarriage and is obviously devastated - as we all are.

Nobody on either side of the family knows we are trying, and if we do get pregnant sooner rather than later I am really worried about how to handle it with her and also his parents who have been really shaken by the whole thing.
Hubby thinks we should wait until quite late on to tell her - the problem is I will NEVER get it past my mum, who notices if my weight changes by a pound and is very intuitive (and also used to work in maternity!) so we would have to tell my family and I can't help but think if his family gets told months after mine do they will be really pissed off!

AAAAAARGH!

I knoe it's all hypothetical at the moment but it's worrying me

 

[Becky]

The best thing to do is, when you conceive and are ready to tell people, tell her yourself. She will appreciate you thinking of her and making sure she heard it from you rather than through the family grapevine. She'll find it hard but it's the most respectful way to do it.

 

[babyblonde]

Thanks hun x

 

[shezza30]

Slightly differnent situation for me, but kind of the same I had a very early miscarriage 1st month ttc and one of my friends had an unwanted pregnancy. She ended up having a termination but was too scared to tell me because she thought it would upset me. It wasn't like that at all, can understand where she was coming from but the thing is, it's someone elses' situation and not yours. Kind of not related at all really

Think Becky is right, you should tell her yourself and I'm sure she will be happy for you.

 

[Snuggle]

I agree with the others babes, tell her yourself when the time comes and I'm sure she will be pleased for you

 

[babyblonde]

thanks girls - it's really helpful to get some advice from people who know what it's all about!

We were really upset when we had our chemical pregnancy earlier in the month but I can't imagine what it feels like to lose a baby at 12 or 13 weeks.