Doing it all again? Am I mad?

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by -, Jan 22, 2006.

  1. Guest

    I must sound mad with the question which follows, but when is the best time to have another baby after a birth? Not considering it for a year or so yet probably, but is that enough time to get back to normal?

    Me and Mark would love 2 kids close together with not more than a couple of years apart if possible (althought I know ttc doesn't always work that way). My mum was pregnant with my brother 6 months after having me and she said it was hard work us being young and so close in age, but also was good too.

    I'm absolutely cr*pping myself at the thought of having another premature baby as there is a high chance I will, and chances are I could deliver earlier even BUT if I don't have another sooner rather than later, I don't think I will do it again.

    Am I mad to be thinking about having another already? Or just plain stupid :oops: :roll:
     
  2. Sarah&Braydon

    Sarah&Braydon Well-Known Member

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    if i had a partner and was living with them and was happy etc i think i would already be TTC id love another baby but at this stage in time i dont think id cope
     
  3. Kerry

    Kerry Well-Known Member

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    As soon as I had given birth to my first I knew I wanted to do it all again!! DH and I always said we wanted them close together if possible as as Harrison (my first) was such a good baby and slept through the night at 6 weeks I was pregnant again before he was 5 months old.

    The pregnancy was tough at times due to tiredness etc and not getting time to rest with having another baby but it was ok. Once Olivia was born, again there were tough days and to be honest there still are sometimes and I doubt thats different in any other family. I had 2 babies, 2 lots of nappies, 2 lots of waking in the night if they were poorly etc etc.

    I wouldn't change a thing now though, they are best friends and so close, its like having twins.

    From my experience of working with families with new babies the best age gap seems to be less than 2 years or more than 4. Between the age of 2 and 4 they get the terrible twos (sometimes) and can be very reliant on mummy as they have had 2 years of having her all to themselves. They can get jealous too. If they are younger like Harrison was he didn't understand what it was to be jealous and he had been told about the baby from the age of about 6 months old so never knew any different, when she was born she was just the baby we had always talked about.

    Also over the age of 4 they are a bit more understanding of babies needs and that you can't always split yourself in 2 when one of them wants something.

    What ever you decide will be the right thing for you. Good luck xx
     
  4. ToriElla

    ToriElla Well-Known Member

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    There is 1yr 5months between me and my younger sister and we were like twins too. There is 6years difference between me and my younger brother and he found it hard when he couldn't really come out with us and stuff.

    The closer together they are the more they usually have in common.

    I would just make sure you will be able to get plenty of rest when you are pregnant again (maybe get your mam to help out etc) especially if you are concerned about having another premature baby. You don't want to tire yourself out too much and not be able to take it easy when you need too. xx
     
  5. Kim

    Kim Well-Known Member

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    For the 1st couple of weeks after having Rubie I swore I would NEVER do it again, I hated everything about pregnancy and childbirth, but from about a week ago, I really want loads more and look back on pregnancy and childbirth as an amazing experience. I don't trust my own judgement at the moment cos I think it's the hormones talking lol

    God knows what I'll want next week :shock:
     
  6. Guest

    When is it 'safe' for your body to go through it all again?? I'm gagging for more!! :lol:
     
  7. Kim

    Kim Well-Known Member

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    You are mad Sami!! :D
     
  8. AmberNicole

    AmberNicole Well-Known Member

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    You're not mad at all! :p I can't wait to have more kids...am hoping to have 3 or 4. :shock: My midwife advised me to wait a year before ttc again. We'd like to buy a house before we try again though.
     
  9. AmberNicole

    AmberNicole Well-Known Member

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    Just wanted to add....My uncle's girlfriend got pregnant like 4 months after their last baby and she handled the pregnancy just fine. Everyone is different though and I'd definately give it more time than that! :shock:
     
  10. Sarah&Braydon

    Sarah&Braydon Well-Known Member

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    good god that would mean i would fall pg on soon lol mising the major ingrediant tho - THE BLOKE
     
  11. beanie

    beanie Well-Known Member

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    Funny enough me and OH were aving this conversation today. I'd like to wait a bit, want to wait till Seren goes to nursery, so looking at about 3-4 years. There was a 3 yr gap between me and my sister and we are very close so am aiming for the same. I would like 3 children all together but OH only wants 2, we shall see. I take my hat of to those mothers with more than one very small child and have so much admiration for you, I am finding this one exhausting enough and personally feel that I could not cope with another so soon.
     
  12. Guest

    I think I want a 2 year gap, maybe 3 max, I hope to give my body a year before we ttc, but I'm so broody. Shall see how I feel in a month when the hormones are well and truely out of my system!! (Keep checking for a ttc ticker lol)
     
  13. Lucy

    Lucy Well-Known Member

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    Hi Sami

    My older brother and sister have 11 months between then and coincidentally DH's older sister and brother are also 11 months apart in age (born the same year!)

    Personally I think we'll try and aim for an 18 month to 2 year age gap but we'll have to wait and see how we cope with 1!

    Beanie - I agree, my friend has 3 kids under 4 yrs old and I really can't imagine how she coped with each newborn and toddlers but she has done a great job and has a really happy family.

    Lucy
    37 + 6
     
  14. beanie

    beanie Well-Known Member

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    iwas the same!! guess its true what they say you do forget all the pain. :D
     
  15. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    i dont think your mad at all, there is 18 months between charlie and ethan and they get on so well, they are very close, its nice :)

    We want the same for Coby so we will be trying again before the year is out.

    best of luck for you hun

    xx
     
  16. Kerry

    Kerry Well-Known Member

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    I was fine conceiving when my first was 5 months old. Remember though that it doesn't always happen as quick the second time around which is why we started trying so early........it worked first time!!!! We were gobsmacked!!
     

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