i would have said to you im ok and can talk about both the losses iv had and deal with it fine however, today no reason at all apart from not really getting my own way about something trivial i burst into tears and it just seems to much, i dont want to "blame" my losses on my emotional state but cannot understand why else i would be so irrational at the moment. i am not crying over anything in particular and i just feel angry and upset, i dont really understand its almost like a stress reaction except im not stressed and would say im generally happy day to day? could i stilll have risidual hormones? (preg test was negative last week on wed) or could it be my first after loss period is due? i just dont get it?
does anyone else get upset for no reason ?
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BabyBrain
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Oh hunny, it's just good old fashioned bereavement. You've lost someone you love very much and it can take years to get over. My mum lost my brother nearly 40 years ago and she will still cry for her little boy. Af hormones certainly won't help but they are a positive step that your body is recovering and if you want to try again it makes the process more stable.
Don't over analyse your feelings, everything you are going through is part of the normal process. You'll get there, it takes time but you will xxxxxxxxxxxx
Don't over analyse your feelings, everything you are going through is part of the normal process. You'll get there, it takes time but you will xxxxxxxxxxxx
dyscochick
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I agree with babybrain, its just grief and it pops up even when we think we've handled everything, 
Corrinne37
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Hi K8,
I have had a really similar thing but with a stinking bad mood instead coming from nowhere.
Friday at work all was fine then near the end of the day I just suddenly felt really angry and really god damn peed off, about what I dont know?? Work had been calm and pretty stress free. But I had a go at a cple of girls on my team (then felt bad about that) then had a go at OH when i got home, as he had done the shopping and got something different than what I wanted! and this is not me, Im not a moody bad tempered person.
Then yesterday, the same thing happened again - from nowhere! I have literally just finished my first AF - so maybe hormones / emotions too. Its all going on in our sub conscious I suppose.
Like you I am really ok on the surface, (see my mood thingy - mellow!!!!) but I suppose deep down feeling s are still bubbling.
Its not nice what we've been through, and especially to go through it twice, and we should never underestimate that.
But yes we will get there, but i guess its a long journey, but we have come along way already. xxxxxxx
I have had a really similar thing but with a stinking bad mood instead coming from nowhere.
Friday at work all was fine then near the end of the day I just suddenly felt really angry and really god damn peed off, about what I dont know?? Work had been calm and pretty stress free. But I had a go at a cple of girls on my team (then felt bad about that) then had a go at OH when i got home, as he had done the shopping and got something different than what I wanted! and this is not me, Im not a moody bad tempered person.
Then yesterday, the same thing happened again - from nowhere! I have literally just finished my first AF - so maybe hormones / emotions too. Its all going on in our sub conscious I suppose.
Like you I am really ok on the surface, (see my mood thingy - mellow!!!!) but I suppose deep down feeling s are still bubbling.
Its not nice what we've been through, and especially to go through it twice, and we should never underestimate that.
But yes we will get there, but i guess its a long journey, but we have come along way already. xxxxxxx
girls you are amazing and always there when i need you. i had a mars ice cream bar last night and that helped me feel marjonally better (the power of comfort food) but today im feelling less sad and guna have a good day with mum who i need to collect from her train in a bit i think you are right it does creep up on you now and again bad moods tears its strange to be so out of control of it though isnt it. hugs to all and thankyou once again for being my venting post! xxxhugs xxxx
CARNAT22
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I have spent the past 5 months in a constant state of hormonal mood swings !!
From early May until late May I had a threatened M/C, from late May until early July I was bleeding following the M/C. In Mid July I had a period. I then had one normal cycle and was pregnant again - only for this to be a chemical pregnancy.
I can't remember what it feels like to not be a moody, emotional wreck
Luckily for the most part I hold it together, my poor OH tends to bare the brunt of things but occasionally if I am at work or with friends it can creep up on me.
I have lost track as to whether it is hormones or grief.
God I sound like a complete nut job LOL! I actually thought I was quite well balanced until I read this back !!!
xxxxxxxxxxx
From early May until late May I had a threatened M/C, from late May until early July I was bleeding following the M/C. In Mid July I had a period. I then had one normal cycle and was pregnant again - only for this to be a chemical pregnancy.
I can't remember what it feels like to not be a moody, emotional wreck
Luckily for the most part I hold it together, my poor OH tends to bare the brunt of things but occasionally if I am at work or with friends it can creep up on me.
I have lost track as to whether it is hormones or grief.
God I sound like a complete nut job LOL! I actually thought I was quite well balanced until I read this back !!!
xxxxxxxxxxx
dyscochick
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oh wow you have been through the wringer, its funny how we think are doing so well til we look back. I thought i coped fine and was doing ok with my mc til i got to 2 months after it felt like a fog had lifted and i realised how little i'd done in that time!
Dragonfly Fi
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Other than the one cry i had on Liam 5 days after the delivery... plus a few tears on the Thursday of the scan... i have not shed a tear. I often wonder if i have switched myself off (i did for many years a while back because of something horrible that happened to me) which is (i think) much more damaging than letting yourself cry
your doing brilliantly xxx
your doing brilliantly xxx
Corrinne37
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You have to cry Fi and let it out, it is an awful awful thing that has happened you are allowed to bawl your eyes out and let it out. and yes it is healthier, if you bury it deep it has to come out at some time. xxxx
netty
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i go through phases of being super upset then nothing, i can talk about it ok to people but its kinda like i am describing so,ething that didnt happen to me in a way i guess i dissassociate it from myself, so wierd how a MC makes you feel, its like nothing in this earth
Corrinne37
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I know - no one understands the roller coaster of emotions unless they have been there already.
I have put on about a stone since my 2 MC's , as I know I comfort eat. I was talking to a friend about it & said to me,
( she meant it in a good way & was trying to motivate me )
-' its like your moping ever since.'
the words keep playing on my mind, its not like it happened, your upset, it goes away. It doesnt , it doesnt go away and no one understands that unless they have been there. xx
I have put on about a stone since my 2 MC's , as I know I comfort eat. I was talking to a friend about it & said to me,
( she meant it in a good way & was trying to motivate me )
-' its like your moping ever since.'
the words keep playing on my mind, its not like it happened, your upset, it goes away. It doesnt , it doesnt go away and no one understands that unless they have been there. xx
TORino
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I was really snappy afterwards for a long time. I was horrible really. If something didn't go right I'd shout/curse/cause arguments.
It can't have been very nice for people to witness the self destruction but I guess it's just a way of dealing with the grief.
It can't have been very nice for people to witness the self destruction but I guess it's just a way of dealing with the grief.
LuW
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Oh god if I wasn't allowed my random emotional outbursts I don't know where I'd be!
Had a beautiful one on friday I believe was rightly placed(even if I was a little irrational) but OH's family support his sister. Believe me, explaining to your lesbien sil who hasn't a maternal bone in her body while remaining polite once shes called your baby an 'it' is completely impossible.
While I get none of the other women in OH's life have been unlucky enough to experience this, but they've lost loved ones and don't go around calling their grandad an 'it' or anyone else whose passed away. Yet I as in the wrong. Me and L seem to live in the dog house these days.
Had a beautiful one on friday I believe was rightly placed(even if I was a little irrational) but OH's family support his sister. Believe me, explaining to your lesbien sil who hasn't a maternal bone in her body while remaining polite once shes called your baby an 'it' is completely impossible.
While I get none of the other women in OH's life have been unlucky enough to experience this, but they've lost loved ones and don't go around calling their grandad an 'it' or anyone else whose passed away. Yet I as in the wrong. Me and L seem to live in the dog house these days.
KarolinaMoon
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Hi all,
I think it's totally understandable to have emotional ups and downs (or maybe more downs than ups), after a m/c. Alot of it will be caused by hormones!!! I had my m/c last thursday, it feels like this has been some kind of crazy nightmare. I can't now believe I was pregnant to began with, if that makes sense??!! My M/c was timed awfully, not that I had a choice in it, but had alot of other 'issues' going on at the time, and trying to juggle everything whilst managing a M/C was very unpleasant. Something I will never forget! I choose not to tell my family, as they never even knew I was pregnant, and the other family 'issues', I felt were enough for them to deal with, without having to know about my M/C.
I can't describe how I feel now almost a week later, numb would probably be the best description!!! But, I definitely feel better emotionally than what I felt last week.
I think it helps to remember that things will and do get better!!
xxxx
xxxx
I think it's totally understandable to have emotional ups and downs (or maybe more downs than ups), after a m/c. Alot of it will be caused by hormones!!! I had my m/c last thursday, it feels like this has been some kind of crazy nightmare. I can't now believe I was pregnant to began with, if that makes sense??!! My M/c was timed awfully, not that I had a choice in it, but had alot of other 'issues' going on at the time, and trying to juggle everything whilst managing a M/C was very unpleasant. Something I will never forget! I choose not to tell my family, as they never even knew I was pregnant, and the other family 'issues', I felt were enough for them to deal with, without having to know about my M/C.
I can't describe how I feel now almost a week later, numb would probably be the best description!!! But, I definitely feel better emotionally than what I felt last week.
I think it helps to remember that things will and do get better!!
xxxx
xxxx
Thank you all for sharing. It's such a strange time I held my freinds 3 month old the other day part of me felt so happy n part of me Ll twisted up thinkin wish she was mine I am so glad of this forum for good and bad times its been a god send to me xx
LuW
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I've actually taken to avoiding friends with children around Billie's age. So you're a lot braver then me!
We just need time. People don't always understand why we feel the way we do about something they can't see as ever 'exsisting' but that doesn't stop them being our children. We might not have night feeds or dirty nappies to deal but that doesn't make us any less of Mummies then anyone else. And just because others don't understand that doesn't take away our right to mourn or to still want to treat our children at times(whether it's good for us or not) and to still protect them.
We shouldn't ever feel bad over that and if anyone ever makes you feel like you're 'weird' for loving your little Angel baby and taking your time over grieving.
Cuddles xxxxx
We just need time. People don't always understand why we feel the way we do about something they can't see as ever 'exsisting' but that doesn't stop them being our children. We might not have night feeds or dirty nappies to deal but that doesn't make us any less of Mummies then anyone else. And just because others don't understand that doesn't take away our right to mourn or to still want to treat our children at times(whether it's good for us or not) and to still protect them.
We shouldn't ever feel bad over that and if anyone ever makes you feel like you're 'weird' for loving your little Angel baby and taking your time over grieving.
Cuddles xxxxx
