Do you think im being unreasonable?

[xxsammyxx]

I guess most of you have read my "God what a nightmare" post and know the current situation of me being in Holland. Well, OH has now got interviews on Weds and Thurs BUT has said he will fly back with me early saturday morning to Spain and then fly back again to Holland on Tues morning. The thing is im due to ovulate Monday and if i fly back alone then we will miss this months OV, plus i have car issues and we need to sort out a car so DD can get to school on Monday (nooo shes not driving, i am ) I am not happy about flying back alone after all the air scares and also i cant get from the spanish airport home unless i pay 50€ for a taxi. Am i being unreasonable asking OH to fly back with me as it will cost him another 270€ (about £230) (this was always the plan anyway!) or should i just suffer it and fly back alone and try and sort the problems out when i get there, miss OV etc? We have been trying for 18 months to conceive and i feel every month is crucial. Please give your honest opinions as i just want you to be honest. Thanks...

 

[Snuggle]

If that was the plan anyway then stick with it hun. If it was me I would fly back alone to save the money but thats coz we're skint

 

[fran_23]

Hun its completely up to you him flying with you and then going back sounds a lot more beneficial as you won't miss your OV and you won't have to fly alone and you'll both be able to sort a car out and if i remember rightly his mate can pick you up at the airport! If you fly back alone and have to sort out all the syuff in spain alone and miss OV i think you will feel major resentment towards your OH!!! if he is willing to come back to spain with you sort all the stuff you need to out..do a bit of BDing and then go back and do his stuff then why not let him? He has put you out by making you stay there with his nasty father for over a week longer than you planned for...sod it your not being unreasonable!! you've stuck to his plans for the last 2.5 weeks..make him do things your way for once!!


PS let his dad pick up the tab hes the one whos so insistant on his son getting a job over there!!!

 

[ShineyHappyPeople]

If that was the plan anyway then stick with it hun. If it was me I would fly back alone to save the money but thats coz we're skint

same but then i'd hate to miss OV too.. its hard to know.

 

[Jade89]

I agree with fran, you have had a shit few weeks and he should do something for you.

Im just a bit confused...If you both live in Spain then why is he trying to get a job in Holland?

 

[xxsammyxx]

Jade - well he is Dutch, he came over to spain for a few months to complete his degree but sort of ended up staying and living there and then he met me (poor sod! lol) But the company he worked for has gone bankrupt and jobs have dried up in spain so he is approaching large Dutch companies who specialise in positions around the globe. We hope for him to land a job where we can stay in spain but failing that we will have to move to Holland for the foreseeable future. One of the interviews in Holland are next wednesday and this is a position where we can stay in spain...

The insurance company have now told us if we want a courtesy car we have to go and get it... only 25 mins driving from where we live.... oh we will walk shall we? idiots.

We could do without the expense but i dont see why or how i have to go back home alone to face all the crap we have to sort out. Plus your right his mate can pick us up from the airport, maybe give us a lift to get the car. We can BD monday and Tuesday morning and this should cover OV. Im sure people on here will appreciate then when you have been TTc for 18 months, counting every day in the 2WW, then counting another 2 weeks until OV and then back in the 2WW again for so long, every month is crucial. I dont think i can go 6 weeks without at least having something to hope for.... Its just unfortunate its falling over OV but hey i never intended to be here for more than a week and we would have been here 2.5 when we go back. I will go insane if i dont go back now... i cant stay here cos of DD in school monday, appointment with doctor weds, apt on Tuesday etc. Plus mum and dad have looked after DD long enough now and they must want a break!!!! (although she is as good as gold and 10 so pretty independant) I miss her terribly though...

 

[BountyBoo]

I'd make him come with you because you've had to put up with a load of crap on his behalf and i think it's only fair he does something for you

 

[ejjie]

Hi hon,

For what it's worth I think you should get him to come back with you, not necessarily for TTC but because you need to get him away from his family and have some time together to talk about what's been happening since you've been over there.

xx

 

[ShineyHappyPeople]

Your definitely not being unreasonable

 

[Snuggle]

Hi hon,

For what it's worth I think you should get him to come back with you, not necessarily for TTC but because you need to get him away from his family and have some time together to talk about what's been happening since you've been over there.

xx

I agree x

 

[LittleLambe]

Flying home with you is the least he can do. Like Ejjie said, I think its important for the two of you to have some time together, without his s**t family. What is he saying?? does he want to stay in Holland??

 

[ejjie]

Hi Sammy,

Did you both make a decision?

 

[xxsammyxx]

Hi everyone, no hes fine with flying back with me. Its a good job because he now has an interview weds and thursday next week and i suppose some more after that but at least ill be home with DD and my cats! The weather is shite here but we leave tomorrow. I bought his mum some flowers to say thanks for having me (she has been nice enough) I bought his dad nothing as that is what he deserves basically. We leave tomorrow morning at 3.30am and drive to the airport (1.5 hours in the car with his dad will be painful) OH will then fly back tuesday for another week of interviews but he will stay with his mate at his house so that will be better for him. I tld his mum yesterday that even if we do have to move to Holland it wont be permanent and we are looking at other countries before this one!!!! This will relay back to his dad who wont like this idea!!! Shame that. I cant wait to get back home.... though im not happy to hear that yet another plane (BA) has crashed on the runway. Im now cacking myself at flying

 

[fran_23]

Aww so glad to hear that!! phew..his dad sounds like a nightmare, oh well you'll be out of there soon!
you must be beaming now you know you are leaving and you get to see DD really soon

 

[xxsammyxx]

does it show????

 

[fran_23]

Seriously yes i could tell from the tone of your message how relieved you are to be getting out of there!! hehe

 

[emeraldsroses]

sammy, I forgot what part of Holland you're OH is trying to get a job, but he has to get it It would be great to have another person who speaks English out here

 

[xxsammyxx]

I dont really want to move here but i guess that means we will have to!!! lol. There is a high chance we will.... his parents live in Almelo (dont ask me where that is in Holland - not a clue!) He has been for an interview in Amsterdam but he didnt get that one. The rest are around this area. Hmmmm yeah it will be nice to know there s at least one other english person here as i dont speak a word of Dutch! Where are you from emerald? Do you speak any Dutch?

 

[emeraldsroses]

I dont really want to move here but i guess that means we will have to!!! lol. There is a high chance we will.... his parents live in Almelo (dont ask me where that is in Holland - not a clue!) He has been for an interview in Amsterdam but he didnt get that one. The rest are around this area. Hmmmm yeah it will be nice to know there s at least one other english person here as i dont speak a word of Dutch! Where are you from emerald? Do you speak any Dutch?

WOW! Armelo is near the German border! That's really far from me. I'm near Rotterdam. Shame your OH didn't get the job in Amsterdam. That would have been so much closer to me

And to answer your question: yes I speak Dutch. I've been living here for 20 years, so I should hope so. If you have to move to the Netherlands, you will learn Dutch, especially up there in Armelo. I have no clue how their English is out there, but if it's anything like my students, then you will have to learn Dutch. Don't worry, though. There are Dutch courses you can take which will help you on your way