Dilemma

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Anonymous283, Aug 2, 2020.

  1. Anonymous283

    Anonymous283 New Member

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    Hi, so i am going to start with a little background... i was sterilised 2 years ago after 3 really bad pregnancies and a DA relationship with my sons dad and had an abortion to prevent anymore kids being brought into an unstable home.
    Fast forward to current day! Lockdown got pretty crazy, i became friends with a nice person, we spent alot of time together after lockdown was eased slightly. Mainly talking because i was having a difficult time with my current situation which im not going to go into, he was having a hard time with his ex who he still loves.
    One night we slept together, and this led to a few more nights, No strings, no feelings, just two consenting adults.
    On Friday he messaged to say he wanted to give it another go with his ex, i supported that and i am genuinely happy for him because i knew all along he loved her and he never denied that to me!
    Saturday i realised my period is late, only by a few days but thats not like me, but im not paranoid because i thought well ive been sterilised its fine! today still no period so i bought a test just to prove to myself im being stupid, but its flashed up positive.
    i have since ordered a further two tests off ebay and i am doing nothing until I know for sure, but nobody knows we slept together. In our heads it didn’t even happen. I lied to my best friend and told her i hadnt because i knew she liked him a few years back but he didn’t feel the same way and its been raw since.
    My gut instinct is saying once i know for sure i need to get rid of it and not tell him! But i know myself that is a dangerous path.
    i dont want to be in a relationship with him or anyone and i dont want anymore kids which is why i was sterilised at 27! Im now 29 so by no means am i young and naive. I genuinely do not know what to do though. I am badly hoping its a false positive, i found two lumps in my breast and i am awaiting the breast clinic appointment which is what he was supporting me through. Now im wondering if maybe i do have cancer as it can flash a false positive too! But i dont want that either with 3 young kids who need me but either scenario is not good for me right now.
    feel free to judge me because i am judging myself so bad right now. Im not a bad person really i have just made a mistake and slept with someone without protection but we were both single, knew we had no stds and thought i was unable to get pregnant.
     
  2. Princess81

    Princess81 Well-Known Member

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    Oh crikey that’s a confusing time for you! Obviously having been sterilised a couple years ago you’d assume you were safe from unplanned pregnancy.
    It sounds like a baby isn’t an option for you at all, but your choice lies with whether to tell him
    About it or not.... you certainly don’t have to tell him by any means - it’s just whether you think u you should morally or not. It’s difficult and I hope it all works out for you x
     
  3. Kitana

    Kitana Moderator

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    I'm sorry you're going through such a bad time. Do you have anyone you can talk to? Someone who could help?
    What procedure did you have done when you were sterilised? Was there still a chance of pregnancy?x
     
  4. miamia

    miamia Well-Known Member

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    Hi, I am sorry you are going through this. I would recommend seeing a doc to have some tests done to find out more about your current situation.
     

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