Can't breast feed and made to feel guilty about it!

[JoAnn&Aimee]

I am getting a bit fed up of feeling guilty for not breastfeeding Aimee. There are posters everywhere about it and everything says 'professionals reccommend breastfeeding'. I do feel awful as I wanted to breastfeed but I've had to go back onto my anti-depressants which means I can't do it. Also my breasts haven't leaked since having her so I doubt I have milk in there anyway.

Just feeling a bit crap for it really. Anyone else who doesn't breastfeed feel awful about it?

 

[NIE]

Hey there babes.

I know exactly how you feel. I wanted to give BF a go but was unable because I just didn't produce anything and was recommended to bottle feed. I felt really down about it and infact I felt like a failure and a rubbish mum.

I don't have any advice for you babes as I just got on with it and tried to concentrate on giving my son all the love I could. The only thing I would say is that it is very early days and it is only natural to be feeling a little down and off.

Try not to worry about it. I'm here if you need a chat. xxx

 

[Minxy]

Just wanted to offer these

I felt totally crap after making a decision too early about breastfeeding. I saw those posters everywhere I went and mistakenly felt a bit 'put out' when I heard about or read posts on mums doing well with feeding or congratulating others.

Your hormones are up the wall but THIS WILL PASS. Your baby is getting fed and primarily that's all they care about (along with cuddles at the mo ).

I'm now totally positive about feeding and will use my experiences to hopefully successfully breastfeed next time.

But please don't waste energies on bad feelings you don't need at this special time. Enjoy your cuddles with your beautiful daughter xxxx

 

[LilysMummy]

I chose to bottlefeed after 3day or tremendious pain and terrible bruising and the MW made me feel awful to start with but I have a HEALTHY and happy baby now and honestly, I wouldnt change a thing! With me it was the sooner I accepted the fact that she was very happy on fomula the quicker the "weight" off my shoulders lifted

Youve still got hormones racing once they settle a bit Im sure you will feel tonnes better

Always here if you need a chat just PM me

 

[Squiglet]

ooo don't waste this time on feeling guilty.. This is a wonderful time and you will miss it when its gone and when you blink its gone... There will be many many things you will feel guilty for doing with your baby/child/tweenie/teenager.. its called being a mummy Raise your baby with love, responsibility and respect... the rest is just pocket money (iykwim)...

 

[Becky]

Definitely don't feel guilty. Ultimately what your baby needs is a happy healthy mum and if keeping on your anti-d's and bottle feeding gives your baby that then you have nothing to feel bad about.

Yes breastfeeding is great for mum and baby but I'd take a happy mummy over a few months of breast milk. What's the point of breastfeeding if it causes you to have a relapse of depression which tbh could be more damaging to your relationship with your baby and could take a long time to sort out.

Be happy and enjoy your baby and focus on getting to know her. That's all that matters.

 

[daftscotslass]

Can't add much to the fabby posts above. I remember that feeling well. Have lots of these

 

[laracomps]

ooo don't waste this time on feeling guilty.. This is a wonderful time and you will miss it when its gone and when you blink its gone... There will be many many things you will feel guilty for doing with your baby/child/tweenie/teenager.. its called being a mummy Raise your baby with love, responsibility and respect... the rest is just pocket money (iykwim)...

I totally agree with this. I spent weeks and weeks getting down and upset about it. HV was worried I was getting PND.

To be honest its not worth feeling bad about - somethings in this life you cannot change. Your baby will love you no less for it! The best advice I received is happy mummy = happy baby, probably from Squiglet!

Its so so true. However, everyone told me not to feel bad but I still did. Its hard, especially combined with the baby blues. One of the hardest decisions and time of my life probably. I never expected the emotional turmoil that giving birth and having a baby brings.

Once I had gotten over it, I started to enjoy being a Mummy so much more. I still have a great bond with Phoebe, she still gazes into my eyes when I feed her. And yes she's had a cold since she was born, but so have other breastfed babies that I know!

Deep down I am still sad it didn't work out, but I push those feelings aside and look at my beautiful thriving daughter

Try not to feel bad, trust me you will blink like Squiglet says and she'll be 4 months like Phoebe is! Then you'll be starting to think about weaning.

Feel free to PM me if you need a chat

 

[Suzie and Faith]

I had such trouble breastfeeding and i only gave up when i couldn't take it anymore. I now think i should have given in earlier as i got depressed, fed up and wasn't enjoy my bubba.

Formula is good stuff and little Aimee is doing well don't feel bad enjoy being a mummy xxxxxxxxx

 

[clarey]

Dont feel bad hun, there is soooo much pressure to breastfeed but its not aimed at ladies who cant for reasons such as yours, I think too many people dont even consider it so its aimed at them.
Theres always something to feel guilty about as squig said, just enjoy your cuddles and gazing into LOs eyes (much harder to do this when breastfeeding incidently )