bullying or not???

[Mrs.s]

hi I just wanted to see if im over-reacting due to hormones or if this is something I should tell someone about

I work with about 8 people who are all near my age of 24 (apart from two older people who are not included in this) however im the only married one and I know im older than my years I always have been!

recently I feel like they are all talking about me behind my back and one of them in particular keeps making comments everytime I say something he does it quietly and thinks I cant hear him but I can when I have pulled him up and asked him to repeat it he wont! this has been getting worse and worse this week and I feel like I cant even opend my mouth about anything he also saw something on my facebook about my husband which was personal and then decided to ask me about it infront of everyone he thinks he is being sly but I know he is taking the piss out of me because Im not stupid!

yesterday I was told them our baby names cos someone asked and one guy decided to take the piss out of my 1st name choice which I found very upsetting and i asked him to stop but he carried on!

now today they were all emailing each other and didnt include me about going for lunch then one of them said "oh steph what are you doing for lunch" with a smirk on his face so I knew instantly that they were all going for lunch and didnt invite me which they did about 5 minutes later!

I feel really down now and i just dont want to be here at all but im not sure if im over reacting or not??

 

[Miss]

Hey Mrs S

Wow sounds to me like your work colleagues are childish and immature. Also sounds like you are the odd one out for being grown up with a secure relationship and having a family! - In my opinion these are the best reasons to be the odd one out

What is going on is a form of bullying - bullying in the workplace is hard to report and we can sometimes feel childish for doing so, however your employer has a duty to sort out these problems for you and make your working enviroment a safe and happy one (even more so now you are expecting!)

Report the problem, if it continues report it again! Do not let people who do not matter make you feel down and upset hun....they are not worth it and you do not deserve it.

Look after yourself you have a little someone depending on you to do so!

Good luck!

 

[Mrs.s]

Hi

thanks for that its really hard because most of the time I think its really childish and I should just let it go over my head but this week I have been tired and probably more emotional than normal so its getting to me! I dont mind being the odd one out but I dont like to be taken the piss out of because I happen to be more mature than they are! I thinik I will see how I feel next week beofre saying anything

 

[setdse]

aww Mrs.s

Yea i agree with miss. This is a form of bullying and no matter if u r odd (even tho they are the best reasons to be) you should still not be singled out. in my work place the procedure is to keep a writen log of comments or anything that you think isnt fair. But definately talk to your boss!

As like you i am very mature for my age and although im only 19 there are several girls at my work in their 30's and you can tell im alot more matture and have a "good head on me" so my boss says

I know it doesnt solve the bulling at all but why not ask to have lunch with the older 1's you said arent bullying. They are probably more on your maturity level.

People only bully others becaue of their own insecurities! They probably dispise you for having a man who you love and loves you and little one on the way! alot of people are like that with me. Especially as i am as young as i am.

I hope things get easier for you

 

[flexilexi394]

agreed with both of the above - how childish and pathetic. i dont agree with singling people out at all - some banter is ok but not if its actually getting to you its not. id chat to the boss if i were you. I personally would make whitty comments back and make them feel stupid, but i think it takes a lot to do this if youve got no one to back you so to speak! try your hardest to ignore it, i hope they grow up soon xx

 

[Mrs.s]

thanks setdse

I think I will say something if it carries on next week i dont 8 more weeks of this!
I would expect it from women as im used to odd dig form older single woman making comments about how young I was to get married and now be pregnant (my mum was married with two kids by my age so im behind her lol) but the people who are giving me shit are boys I wont say men because they are not mature enough to be called men! must be because they are all single and ugly!! lol

 

[setdse]

maybe they want you!

 

[Mrs.s]

haha setdse I doubt that very much!!! but thanks!

thanks lexi its good to know im not just being a hormonal wreck and over reacting!

 

[smess26]

Oh hunny there being Quite nasty

 

[smess26]

Damn sorry it sent before I meant it too!!!!!!!

Normally it wouldn't bother you I am the same every little thing is affecting me!!
I shall give you a big hug sorry I don't have much advice!! X x.

 

[xshauna_bazx]

I dont think your over reacting atall, these people are childish and immature. You have your family friends...baby, skrew the lot of them i wouldnt take there shit. Your better than that xxx

 

[amandapanda]

These people may not think they are bullying you, but they are. I'd start recording every incident and comment including dates and times, just so you've got a written record if things have to go further. This happens at my work but unfortunately it is my boss who is centrally involved in the bullying! She has a core of 'favourites' who she chats to and slags off other workers to! She had the cheek today to tell me not to have a 1 minute conversation with a nurse because it could be seen as gossiping instead of working, but it's perfectly ok for her to be chatting to her favourites for 30 minutes about her bleedin dog!! Grrrr! Lol xx

 

[setdse]

haha at least i made u laugh! Just think tho.... they may be jelous cos u have a man and its not them..... just think about next time u see them.... its sure to make the situation funny on ur side. and then u can laugh at them and they'll be all confused!

 

[megsmeadow]

I'd also be having a spring clean of my facebook!! If these people aren't your friends don't have them on facebook, and adjust your privacy settings so 'friends of friends' can't see your info.

 

[amy samantha]

I'd say you definitely aren't 'over-reacting'.
I can't believe that certain people still think childish behaviour and remarks are acceptable or funny.
if it hasn't become a massive thing then you might want to just let it die down, but obviously you've been upset by what they've done so if it gets any worse then I'd definitely tell someone.
X

 

[JJ Mum]

What a special lot of people you work with! focus on the two that are not like this , and ignore the rest, don't even bother with them, your'll take all their fun away if you don't react to it. Your the one who is going to have a baby and leave them there working and go on maternity leave, so who is laughing now!

 

[lealea85]

my polite opinion is to tell them to grow up n act their age.

my rude opinion is to tell them to grow a spine and act like a normal person instead of a first class tosser who sucks ass.

(politeness never seems to work n ur being to polite hunny).
and also report it to a line manager.