Bonding with my unborn baby is hard

[Emapot1]

Love has nothing to do with it but I feel so clinical towards my baby. Is it because expecting disaster and bad news so I'm protecting myself from a breakdown? Surely this is being a coward x

 

[LaceyKeo]

This is being sensible.

I can't even begin to imagine what you went through with Annabel, how you managed to get to here, and how you're feeling now. The body, mind, and heart can only deal with so much. I think once you have that beautiful baby in your arms, hear it's first cry... That'll help loads towards switching the clinical over to "real" (didn't know what word to use there... You know what I mean).

Don't try forcing yourself to feel a certain way.
Don't go beating yourself up.

Follow what you need to feel, and just let it come naturally. Xx

 

[Lyllian]

There is no way you could ever call yourself a coward x

 

[bunny123]

Emapot this is not being a coward, it's your way of protecting your heart and feelings from being broken again xx I honestly can't imagine the stress and anxiety you must feel during this pregnancy, but try and remember that this baby more than likely will be completely fine and try enjoy your pregnancy with him/her. If you feel like you aren't bonding then please chat to your midwife or dr maybe there's counselling you could do or support for you?
You are coping the best way you know how, so don't be hard in yourself! Will be keeping my fingers crossed that you have the easiest pregnancy and birth possible xxx

 

[buggy1]

I felt exactly the same way in the beginning! I felt better after the 12 week scan but still not 'normal'. I assume it is for the same reason that I am protecting myself in case something goes wrong again. I thought I'd feel completely better about it after the 16 week scan but unfortunately I still have doubts due to a large blood clot which could effect the pregnancy

Point is I think it is normal to feel this way after loss and you will get there,, even if it isn't until the baby is born, to be honest it doesn't really matter, as long as you get there in the end x

 

[Emapot1]

I hadn't been back on to this thread for some time but I appreciate all the lovely support. It is so difficult to understand why the feeling you have for a baby are strained as naturally you would think to grow a natural bond from start. I have started to listen into babies heart beat more often and a small smile appears on my face to make it feel more real. I have no doubt that when baby gets delivered safely into my arms the feelings of apprehension and fear will slip away but I will still always be nervous for baby x

 

[Louise2013]

I think you are incredibly brave and what you are feeling is only natural. Huge hugs to you and cannot wait to hear news later this year of a happy, healthy arrival xxx