back from hospital.. upset..:(

[scandicmum85]

As I posted earlier here I was looking forward to see a consulent the midwife booked me into at hospital today about my anxiety for birth.. I just feel worse now.. I wrote down a list of questions as suggested, and waited nearly 1hr and half to see the consulent, then a doctor came in and she asked me why I was here and I explained to her that the midwife booked me in etc, and she was like "oh thats no reason to be here".. She checked babys heartbeat told me Im all fine and cud just go home, I tried to discuss with her about my anxiety and wanted to ask her questions and she said " you have nothing to worry about, just go home relax" and also said I had no choice now, I felt really stupid in there. And then I asked her if she could explain to me its not dangerous etc and I would be fine as last birth was hard, and then she said " I cant even guarantee you if you would be fine if u cross the road" I left the hospital and the fofice after 5 minutes of this, and ended up crying infront of everyone at hospital, felt so stupid and I cant stop crying now I feel absolutely terrified, and my OH is just being ridicilous stupid saying she wasnt being rude to me at all and that im overreacting.. I just realise now I have no choice but go through birth etc and I am so scared and why do I have to be like this

Just had to get this out, Im considering just staying in bed and have the baby at home

 

[Bunnykins]

Oh hon I really feel for you, the consultants and midwives I've seen have been the same, never time to discuss questions.
Have you tried reading the positive labour thread that ilove posted, there is some great suggestions that might help relax you, and you can chat about any anxieties with us on here if it helps?
No two labours are the same so this baby could be completely different to your first, but the calmed you are and,more relaxed you are definately helps reduce some pain and risk of complications, yeh and give yourself 10 mins a day in a relaxing place like in the bath or lying on the bed, shut your eyes and picture yourself somewhere lovely like a beach, take deep breaths and when you feel relaxed take yourself through the perfect birth, where u imagine no pain and everything going to plan and your baby being born quickly and easily and the whole thing being a positive experience. It'll help train your brain to not panic so much and to focus on the good things.

 

[MrsHakaxjdx]

can you not ring the midwife who originally gave you the appointment and idea to see the consultant in the first place? explain how you have been treated x

 

[Jayceesmumma]

can you not ring the midwife who originally gave you the appointment and idea to see the consultant in the first place? explain how you have been treated x

Good idea..
That's awful they are being like that they should know anxiety will make your labour harder as u won't be relaxed

 

[Sarah13]

It sounds like you came away feeling worse. I agree with bunnykins, only focus on the good births, there are as many if not more than the horror stories. My SIL had a terrible first labour but very easy, quick relaxed second with a bigger baby. The more you can get your mind focused in the right place the better. Have you tried listening to any hypnobirthing CDs or read any books? Also remember even though your first birth haunts you, you got through it and all the research suggests a second labour is easier. Def come on here to vent your worries, just getting it out there and knowing your not alone can help, and don't read the negative birth posts, I skip over them now and stick to the good ones!

 

[Jayceesmumma]

My sister had a traumatic first assisted birth with a 7lb2 baby just over a yr ago and had her second baby on Wednesday which she managed on gas and air to start and ended using nothing with an 8lb7 baby! No labour is the same as the last, I don't know what you went thru but you can't keep focusing on that.. I had pretty standard births including a back to back which hurt like hell so admittedly I've been petrified.. The fact I watched my sister give birth (and she's tiny!) and after just reading the hypnobirth booklet I'm feeling better!

 

[littlemiss83]

Thats terrible!! No wonder you were upset.

Your not alone i have really bad anxiety about doing it all again too, I keep thinking how there's no way back now, and i've no option, been getting heart palpatations about it as well, I think its gonna get worse especially going on Mat leave soon.

 

[suzzi]

i suffer from anxiety and have to see my dr every month just to say im feeling ok since coming off my tablets when i was first pregnant.

is it possible for you to see your normal dr who could refer you to a counsellor for you to talk through your anxiety maybe even a nurse at the surgery could explain things and reassure you.

i think its quiet normal to feel axious about the birth, have you talked about pain relief, birth position etc so you know exactly what will happen when your in labour, try watching some birthing videos, there are some online, just dont put the volume on, ive done this and its given me a different insight into what happens.

 

[scandicmum85]

Thank u! I feel better reading your post, I think you are right, I need to focus on the good stories and positivity, at least I know the midwifes here are lovely at hospital and great.. And going to focus on how amazing it will be when its all over and I want to see little Baby Sophia now!! xx

 

[LucyAnn]

Cant believe how that ended up!! what plonkers. But glad things are more positive for you now xxxx

 

[Jayceesmumma]

Glad your feeling more positive about it now