attention deficit disorder ...info needed plz

[violet-glow]

Ello! To cut a long story short most of you know that ive been having problems with my 3 year old son for awhile now e.g mood swings etc.

Well today I stopped him from playing with some coloured pencils, because he decided to draw on the walls (normal behaviour?) I put him in the 'naughty corner' where he then decided to punch and kick the wall door and scream 'Help Me!' out of the letter box I've addressed this so many times so I thought id try something new and not say anything about the 'help me' incident. He stayed in the corner for a while still kicking and punching the walls and because I was ignoring him he came into the kitchen where I was mending OHs trousers, picked up the scissors and told me he was going to stab me. I had to wrestl him to the ground in order to get them off him and stop him from hurting me, himself and my daughter

I think ive reached the end of the line with Zack, I dont know what to do. Im contacting the HV tomorrow and ordering her to help. Last time I asked for her help she said "Oh hes just being a 'normal' 3 year old, but hes a little advanced for his age"

Anyway getting to the point me friend said taht my son might have A.D.D. Ive looked for symptoms, but I was wondering if anyone has experienced it first hand???

All replys very much appresheated (sp?)

xxx

 

[Charlotte & Emily]

Hiya hun

It sounds like he could have ADD
I have ADHD (Attension, Deficet, Hyderavticity disorder)
it sounds very similar
i would definaltly mention in to your HV and is she doesnt listen then maybe go to your GP

IF you ever need to chat, you can just PM me

 

[violet-glow]

Thanks hun. I know it may sound stupid but it feels like ive totaly failed as a mother. When I had him I had P.N.D and tried to over come that on my own. I ask the doctors for help, but was put on a waiting list to see councillor... that was 2 years ago and looks liek they have forgotten about me.

We dont let him watch anthing on telly apart from cbeebies... and I very much doubt hes getting this sort of thing from there.

Sorry ive gone off on a rammble.
Im not one for talking about my life really... but I dont know where to turn anymore

Sorry I sound like an idiot

 

[Freya]

You don't sound like an idiot. I think as mothers we tend to blame ourselves for everything. I think you should definately speak to HV and hopefully she will be able to point you in the right direction for help

I think only a concerned, caring mother asks for help

 

[Becks&Riley]

I have ADD it was diagnosed wen i was about 16 I dunno weather i still have it cos i never knew i had it anyway I was a VERY naughty child and even worse teenager
its act now think later thing and not being able to concentrate on anything in my whole life ive never been able 2 do revision for exams etc i wouldnt know how god knows how i managed 2 get a c in english gcse!!

 

[missac]

I have taught a child with adhd and the characteristics he displayed were inability to sit still and concentrate for any period of time, not able to socialise with other children. By the time he was in my class he was medicated so didn't really display any other symptoms but the year before he had been really hard work and even driven the teacher to anti-depressants herself as he made her job impossible.

There are varying degrees of adhd or add I googled it for you and looked under symptoms as I really don't have that much experience with it,

heres a website that may help:
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/adhd.cfm#symptoms

this is bound to be very hard for you as it is a relentless situation but with the right help it will get better. One of the things we noticed with this child is that once he was under the right medication he really enjoyed school and loved doing the right thing, he had spent so long being labelled naughty which he wasn't so he really responded positively with help.

 

[violet-glow]

Thanks girls, I feel so stupid cos I havent stopped crying since it happend.

I love him so much, I just really hate what hes putting us through

 

[Becks&Riley]

it sounds like adhd more than add tbh

 

[Charlotte & Emily]

you havent failed as a mother!
i agree with becks, it does sound like adhd rather than add.

i have a whole list of problems including; Dyslexia, OCD, ADHD lol and i never blame my mum, i know i was born that way and it is how i am supposed to be. Im not ashamed of them either.

Sending you lots of

 

[violet-glow]

Ive had no experience with it so I can only go by what ppl are telling me about it. But basicly he..

Doesnt listen (pretends he does, by saying yeah to everything)

Always on the move, has to touch things. For example we went to my friends house and zack wanted to go upstairs and have a nosey. He would pick everything up etc (always tried to teach him not to touch anything in pther peoples homes)

We took him to a magic show, zack was the only kid who stood up and started heckerling the magician *blushes* ...dont worry he got a GOOD telling off for it... not that he listened.

The list is endles

 

[x-kirsty-x]

You don't sound like an idiot. I think as mothers we tend to blame ourselves for everything. I think you should definately speak to HV and hopefully she will be able to point you in the right direction for help

I think only a concerned, caring mother asks for help

I totally agree

 

[violet-glow]

thats really sweet thank-you.

 

[Dee1985]

I dOnt no any thing about this hun but just wanted to say i hope you get it sorted soon.

and dont think like you have failed him, its a illness, nothing you have done wrong.

my brother was never diagnosed with ADD but he used to be such hard work, he hated it when Dior was born he was 3.5 (now 5) he used to tell me he wanted to stab her kill her i asked why he said it would be funny.
i loved him so much but i felt so bad that i was starting to dislike my own brother

he grew out of it once he went to school though, really sorted him out. now he is fine and great with her.

when things get on top and its to much just try and remeMber its a illness nothing you have done wrong and nothing your son can help

 

[violet-glow]

I dOnt no any thing about this hun but just wanted to say i hope you get it sorted soon.

and dont think like you have failed him, its a illness, nothing you have done wrong.

my brother was never diagnosed with ADD but he used to be such hard work, he hated it when Dior was born he was 3.5 (now 5) he used to tell me he wanted to stab her kill her i asked why he said it would be funny.
i loved him so much but i felt so bad that i was starting to dislike my own brother

he grew out of it once he went to school though, really sorted him out. now he is fine and great with her.

when things get on top and its to much just try and remeMber its a illness nothing you have done wrong and nothing your son can help

Thanks chick Its just really hard sometimes, as you probably know. I think I was just in total shock, keep thinking omg what if he had done it to Elora. My OH is at work and my parents didnt seems to be much help didnt know where to turn. I feel alot better after talking it through with you lot

 

[hannahbet20]

hi hun i dont really have any advice my two boys can be a handfull sometimes i feel they are overley hyperactive but it sounds like ur little man definatley has a problem and its not ur fault at all i hope you get it sorted out soon xxxxxxxxx lots of

 

[jemz24]

hiya i can relate to this

my neice is deaf, has mental problems plus has adhd.
she a right handful very naughty and constanlty hurtin herself like smaking her head against the wall. Its hard to communicate with her as she is deaf.
She has been put with a specialist, in school and out, a routine has been made and now she is in school makes a lot of difference. She needs a lot of attention i tend to sit down with her and read a book tha she seems to enjoy.
She is 6 now and has calmed down a hell of a lot but still can misbahave.
best thing i would say is try a support group they can give u helpfl tips on things to do. HOPE it helps all the best.

 

[Happybunny]

Hiya honey,

Please don't feel like a bad parent, if your son has ADD (which does sound probable) it is certainly not anyone's fault, it is a medical problem not one caused by lack of parental skills.

I am a Special Needs teacher and teach lots of children with ADD. A HV can not diagnose him, he has to go to the doctor who will refer your son for testing. The testing is not stressful and is done sympathetically with your full involvement (or it should be!!)

They will give you lots of advice and help if he is found to have ADD...but promise it is not all bad news, children can be helped with different therapys and if need be, medication, although that is always best to leave until all other avenues have been exhausted.

A small thing you could do to help in the meantime is give your son Omega3 oil. There has been research showing increased level of concentration which results in calmer behaviour, by a trial in Durham. Tests have shown that children with ADD display calmer behaviour and can concentrate more too with a daily dose. You can buy it in tablets and you can get food enriched with Omega3 like milk.

The most important thing you can do is build your son's esteem, I know it must be really difficult to have to deal with his tantrums...but keep reassuring him that you love him, it is the behaviour you don't like.

If you ever need any help or someone to chat to, please pm me, I would be happy to share any information I have with you.

Michelle
xxx