Annoyed with midwife!

[katastrophic]

Has anyone else had difficulties with hospital staff? Anyone been made to feel a little stupid or talked down to?

I'm fuming and if I don't get it all out on here I feel like I might explode and as everyone keeps telling me "it's not good for the baby" arrrggghh!

Had a bit of a scare yesterday as felt queasy and then vomited blood - not nice - also had migraine for five days and felt yuck! Phoned midwife team to tell them what had happened, told them I felt fine but just wanted babba's heartbeat checked as everything had been a bit quiet for the last couple of days...all turned into big drama with midwife shouting down the phone to call an ambulance - well that scared the living daylights out of me and I started to panic! Drove to A&E as felt fine but wanted to get checked and listen to babba, ended up with a five hour wait with me getting more and more anxious and then being sent home with no babba check and no diagnosis, had to drive to maternity hospital otherside of town just to get someone to examine the baby...by now tired, hungry and v. emotional!

When I got to the midwife unit they were sooooo rude and patronising, (this is the first time I have spoken to a midwife outside a structured appointment, I have managed to keep my anxiety in check until now!) they noticed on my notes that I previously suffered with depression and first words when I walked in were not about the blood but about the depression, I was talked down to, accused of being a neurotic mother to be who would cause damage to my baby unless I could sort out my mental state (my mental state is great, just got engaged, having a baby, finally settling in to a new town where the sunshine has been great lately - what's to be miserable about!!!) My OH was then questioned and asked if he "actually wtnessed the alleged vomiting and blood"!!! I hate hospitals - have to be dragged there kicking and screaming! We are both so angry and upset and I have now lost faith in my widwives and its making everything so much more scary and its made me feel so angry!

Had to vent, hope I haven't bored anyone! If anyone has had similar experiences I would love to hear about them!

Kat

28 weeks tomorrow!

 

[Em78]

Omg that is dispicable thank god i havent had anything like that happen but i had to reply cos it made me really mad

i know its propbably the last thing you want to get involved in right now but i think i would complain. they have no right to treat you any differntly becasue you have had depression in the past.

i cant believe they insinuted that you had made it up - yeah cos you really fancied a five hour day out in A&E didnt you, sure it was great fun for you to sit there and worry.

grrrr am really mad on your behalf now!

gets me how they tell you its not good for baby when they are the ones causing the stress!!!

so did they come up with naything as to what may have been the problem? or is it all in your head according to them?


take care, let me get het up for you and you can chill out xxx

 

[katastrophic]

Oh Em you have sooooo cheered me up!!!! PMSL!

Thank you thank you thank you and I think I will complain to my regular midwife when I see her next, I'm just worried that in complaining they will think I'm even more mental than they already do!

Cheers me dear!

Kat x

 

[Em78]

pmsl - careful what you wish for thats a regular occurance in the last few weeks sneezing does it too!

Take care and def complain though!!


em x

 

[Bagpuss17]

That's appalling treatment. You should definitely put a formal complaint in, too many of us just put up with this rubbish treatment, we don't deserve it.

 

[Vicky]

Oh Em you have sooooo cheered me up!!!! PMSL!

Thank you thank you thank you and I think I will complain to my regular midwife when I see her next, I'm just worried that in complaining they will think I'm even more mental than they already do!

Cheers me dear!

Kat x

Their is no point complaining to your midwife when you go and see her next what you need to do is find out the address or telephone number of your complaints office and write to them because they might do something, your midwife wouldn't be able to do anything i'm affriad.

THAT IS APPLAING how they treated you MIDWIFES

 

[lauramumof2]

Has anyone else had difficulties with hospital staff? Anyone been made to feel a little stupid or talked down to?

Get used to it honey, they are a nightmare. As long as you are sure of what you are asking and dont be afraid to speak up you will be fine. You are the mum and they are there to assist you, not to be high handed.

I was nervous and shy first time but this time round Im ready for them.

 

[Bagpuss17]

Your regular midwife might at least tell you who to complain to though and what the procedure is.


I wasn't happy at all with my first midwife and complained to my GP, I had the head of midwives call me up and they took it very seriously.

I've since swapped midwives and have had several since and thankfully, they've all been great.

It's a different situation to yours but my point is if you don't complain they won't know how upsetting it can be from a patients point of view.

I would mention it to your regular midwife, she might be able to help advise where you should send your complaint to.

 

[Dee1985]

i had a crap midwife once,
with my first daughter i had mumps i was 15weeks preg looked on the net and it said that after 12weeks it shouldnt be dangerous for baby..

so i asked the midwife when i seen her she was confused and said "ummm not to sure"

i said well on the net a site said it should be ok, she then said..
yh should be ok then

omg she made no effort to find out for me and just trusted what i read on a random internet site

 

[hayley]

complain.... and keep complaining until you get an apology that you are satisfied with... midwifes forget they are playing with delicate hormones.. to them its their every day job... its disgusting to leave you waiting for 5 hours when your pregnant but being pregnant, sick and anxious!!!! aaarrrhh i'm getting annoyed for you... and then to question you OH... out of order...

My DH complained about treatment we received.. he called the hospital direct and asked for the senior midwife - he didn't get the reply he wanted so he asked for the compaints department... he got a bloke - he apologised and said he'd sort it out and call us back... DH didn't leave it he called him every day until he knew it had been dealt with.... i think too many people let it go! and midwifes are getting used to being rude... i haven't seen the same one twice yet... they are either harsh.. straight to the point or don't seem to be listen...

x

 

[bubble_dreamer]

my god thats disgusting the way you were treated! i would definatly complain and dont let it go until u are happy hun.

i dont even remember the midwife i had with my son so i cant comment on her but i have had the same midwifes with my last and this pregnancy. under community care i have 3 midwives, 2 of them i know well and i see them at every appointment the other one i have only met once and that was a few days after i had my daughter i can only guess she is just a stand by incase the other 2 cant get there. but they have been fantastic with everything - i guess im one of the lucky ones by reading some of the posts on here

 

[Wobbles]

Jesus!!! Complain never mind an apology I'd be satisfied that this woman had a talking down from her boss. That’s flaming outrageous.

I had problems with the ward staff when I first took myself to the hospital. They looked at me stupid, spoke to me stupid.. Need I go on ... It was them who were stupid because it took them weeks to find out my pregnancy was ectopic. Hateful!