Annoyed: Mum

[dannii87]

I love her to pieces but she's REALLY getting on my nerves now.

She's understandably really excited about Evie's arrival, but she's winding me up with her comments... I've told her how I feel under pressure, and still it doesn't register with her to just leave me to do my thing!

Every time I stop what I'm doing I get "you alright? You getting pains?" "Does she feel engaged yet?" "Got any more BH?"

Anyway, she came home from work at 3:45pm (it's now 4:17pm) so in the last 30 minutes I've had;

I was in the bath, came downstairs and Mum said "you rarely have a bath this late in the day! I thought 'ooooh maybe she's getting pains and had a bath' ha!" Then "well, any time between now & Tuesday is fine with me! I've done the wages at work today so bear that in mind" with a little wink

Then she said "I always thought you'd be early, but now you're almost at your due date I expect she'll be late"

And I just get random comments like "you know what'll get things started - Caster oil! Do some Dan! Go on!" - And stuff like "night Dan, sleep well, actually, don't sleep well! I'm wishing labour on you!" And "Have you been on your ball today?" As if I'm still at school & getting asked if I've done my homework

It's CONSTANT comments like this, & it's doing my head in! I'm not even overdue yet!! And even if I do go overdue which is very likely - Leave me alone!!

I feel like everyone's putting pressure on me I told her this is how I feel and that I wish she'd just stop going on and she just said "oh for Gods sake, you're in a mood, go and be in a mood somewhere else please" & she's just not understanding!

Yesterday, she asked me to call her after my MW appointment, I told her how things went and said I was a bit disappointed but there's not a lot I can do. She said "did you ask about the caster oil?" I said the MW doesn't agree with it (I don't know if she does or not, it was to get her off my back) and just said that she told me your cervix has to be "favourable" - which I think is actually true, then she comes back with "well it might be!"

Just needed a whinge. She told me to go and be in a mood somewhere else, so I'm being in a mood here Now she's pissed off with me xx

 

[NickyB]

Anyone would get annoyed with it, I know I will in a few weeks. In fact, I've stopped answering the house phone already!

One of our MW's said to avoid castor oil, it'll apparently work on your bowels and the baby's, and can make her poop merconium in the waters. I'm not saying it's gospel and I haven't looked into it, but it is what we were told at antenatal classes.

You know all this will be over in two weeks, so easier said than done, but deep breath and grin and bear it!

 

[badgergirl]

I remember all of this very well.

You could always tell her your midwife's said that people putting pressure on you to have it has been scientifically proven to keep you "clenched", and the baby well in there

 

[dannii87]

You could always tell her your midwife's said that people putting pressure on you to have it has been scientifically proven to keep you "clenched", and the baby well in there

I'm actually going to say that next time she says anything!!!

Thanks Nicky hun for replying!! I'm not drinking caster oil It will make me sick and I have piles at the moment too so I don't fancy sloppy poo passing by those mofos!! xx

 

[Babylicious]

really pisses you off doesn't it, even though they mean well

 

[lella]

I think its just that your mom is really excited. But I undersatnd how it would get right on your nerves. Dont have any caster oil, it will make you really ill.

 

[dannii87]

Ahhh she's not talking to me now

I've just asked when we are going to take the dogs for a walk because this is childish, and she just said "don't know". So I went to the loo and heard her say "Ryan, do you want to walk the dogs with me?" (Ryan being my 13 year old brother)

If left alone (with no pressure) I would be absolutely fine going overdue! It's not the being overdue that annoys me, I'd like to avoid induction... Which is probably down to my Mum and her making statements about how bad inductions hurt... But when people close to you make you feel like you're letting them down it's a horrible feeling

Oh and with the caster oil comments, I get "Well stop moaning then, you can't be THAT desperate if you won't try it" - I bet she'd feel a million dollars if I took it and something went wrong

Along with this (which also frustrates me) I get "Oooh I didn't get any stretchmarks" & "Your bump still looks high to me" & "induction is THE worst thing EVER... It hurts loads more than natural labour" & "oh well, looks like we'll have to go to that street party on Saturday as there is no sign of Evie " (She doesn't want to go)... Making me feel like I've failed everyone because Evie's not here yet?! xx

 

[Mildly]

I went to see my Mum today and she came out with some great lines.

1) She wants me to hurry up and have this baby because she wants to see it - hmm.. not that when I'm having him is really in my control lol.

2) She has written in her diary that I will be giving birth either on my due date, the day after, or the day after that - I had to clarify with her that this was just her impression as she sounded so sure I wondered if she knew something I didn't.

3) Then she asked me if my OH was planning on taking any pictures after the birth - wtf, I had to again clarify she meant of the baby and then bite my lip so I didn't say that we were planning on waiting until the kid was at least 18 before taking any pictures I mean, who doesn't take pictures of their baby after the birth?

I also get asked if the baby is still moving whenever I go round too

I'm very glad I don't live with my Mum she would drive me up the wall so I know what you're going through Dannii

 

[dannii87]

LOL Mildly!

I know she's excited, and I'm soooo pleased she is because she's going to play a huge part in Evie's future (because me and her are very close), but it's the pressure she puts on me to "do something about it" - There's not a lot I can do! lol She buys me pineapple, caster oil, gets me out walking every day blah blah... xx

 

[NooNoo]

this is exactly what my mum was like...in fact it got that bad i banned her from talking about the baby....everytime she went to speak to me i said..do you want to talk to me or the baby??? if its the baby then save it for when shes here

soooooooooooooooo annoying

 

[Mildly]

Yeah I must admit they are only driving us crazy because they care - that's why I have to bite my tongue a lot!

 

[lfc_sarah]

Im SO glad i didnt have to get all this

 

[Jade&Evie]

Im SO glad i didnt have to get all this

me too! although I still had people say "cor she was late!" when I had Evie at 38+4!

 

[Red_Fairy]

my mum/family was exactly the same!

my older sister was getting married on the 10th (booked before i got pregnant) and when i went over due (i was due on the 5th) - everyone in my family put pressure on me so much - as if id done it on purpuse. (i wanted my mum at the birth, my sister wanted her at the wedding - we wernt talking at the time as she thought i got pregnant on purpose to ruin her day (plus she was doing IVF at the time i got pregnant) so, the family was in bits. grrrs... god even remebering that time almost makes me wanna cry! (it was with my first) i have alot of sympathy!
(hananh was born 4 hours before the 10th lol - so my mum could attend both! (the wedding was 100 miles away so she had to drive through the night lmao)

 

[dannii87]

Aww Red Fairy!! Glad she managed to make it to the birth of your LO in the end though

I tried to talk to her last night before bed (A-Because I was worried I would typically go into labour when we weren't talking and B-Because I hate sleeping on an argument ) She said she's made a conscious decision to only speak to me if I speak to her first, that way she can't be blamed for saying the wrong thing

She can be incredibly childish at times. I told her I'd stop moaning about her going on if she says anything and can we just be OK please and she replied with "well, I know how you feel now so I'd rather not say anything in case you fly off the handle" I did NOT fly off the handle yesterday, I just said "grrr Mum please!! Stop going on!"

Hmmm... I feel bad though because I usually get up with her in the morning (she's the only one in the household working, my step Dad owns his own business and works one day a week). & this morning, ashamed to admit it, I didn't bother getting up after how we left things last night

Her & my step dad had a big row last night over something completely unrelated too, so I reckon she's in a bad mood lately and getting everyone's backs up. Either way, I feel sorry for her that she's now fallen out with 2 people in the house (my 13 yr old brother is going back to his Dads tomorrow) and she'll have isolated herself with no one to talk to

Grrr I feel like the adult!! x

 

[Gem & Leland]

and dont let her keep saying how horrid inductions are , yes prob alot different , but i had my first contraction at 8pm he was born at 12.31 am , so altho fast and furious ! it was alot quicker then alot of naturals !! and how do i know if its worse or more painfull then natural , cos ive never had natural !!! simple !

 

[dannii87]

Thanks ladies!! Now I'm overdue everyone seems to have got over the fact that there's nothing I can do to force her out!

She's totally backed off now - I'm so pleased - We're talking again & I told her that her words have made me totally freak out about inductions now and she apologised and said it was just her experience and didn't mean to scare me...

So... We're back on track and I'm hoping my MW can reassure me that I won't die if I have to have an induction! xxx