A sex question

[CARNAT22]

Sorry to be blunt, just wanted some advice.

Both of my previous M/c's coincidentally began after OH and I had been intimate (not immediately after but within a day / 36 hours?)

Now I know that in no way, shape or form was having sex to blame BUT as I am sure you can all understand I don't want to chance it.

However I am scared the longer I leave it the more worrisome it will be.

My OH is a lovely, tactile guy and I feel bad! I do miss the intimacy sex brings.. I also know that there will plenty of time in the future when I wont actually fancy sex.

Three weeks ago I was making the OH do it twice a day and now he is on a ban. It seems a little unfair.

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[deedee84]

its funny you should say that hun as my bleedin started the morning after with me and my OH, he has mentioned sex recently and i just told him that he will have to wait until i am further on and know everything is ok etc, luckily he understands as he wants this as much as me, i'm sure your OH will feel the same, more hugs and favours for him possibly?? lol, thats all my OH gets at the moment but hes happy with that for now!! xx

 

[CARNAT22]

its funny you should say that hun as my bleedin started the morning after with me and my OH, he has mentioned sex recently and i just told him that he will have to wait until i am further on and know everything is ok etc, luckily he understands as he wants this as much as me, i'm sure your OH will feel the same, more hugs and favours for him possibly?? lol, thats all my OH gets at the moment but hes happy with that for now!! xx

My OH is more scared of doing it that I am and if he started asking for it I'd tell him to bog off. He can go a few weeks without I am sure.

I was just wondering if it was one of those things that get more awkward the longer you leave it? Seems strange to even think that considering how much sex we've had over the years

I guess I just don't want to put 'our' relationship too much to one side this early on?

Isn't it weird about the bleeding and sex?

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[deedee84]

i did the same when i was pregnant with my DD though, i made him wait until after the 12 week scan and it wasnt awkward it was fine just a little scary lol! And yeah it is strange, i'm beginning to wonder if the professionals have got it wrong, i'm steering well clear of sex until after 12 weeks again haha!! xx

 

[kanga86]

My oh is on a sex ban too, we haven't done it since ov! when I was pregnant earlier this year he was on a ban too, we didn't dtd for around 3-4 months with all the problems I had after my mc too. I think they are quite understanding though, even though my oh does keep pestering me. Think I might have to give him a helping hand to keep him quiet! xx

 

[CARNAT22]

i did the same when i was pregnant with my DD though, i made him wait until after the 12 week scan and it wasnt awkward it was fine just a little scary lol! And yeah it is strange, i'm beginning to wonder if the professionals have got it wrong, i'm steering well clear of sex until after 12 weeks again haha!! xx

I was only going to wait until after the early scan LOL!

If I wait until 12 weeks it will be like being a born again virgin

Actually I will see what the Dr says about it all? As you say though they Dr's could have it wrong?

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[BabyBrain]

We found plenty of other ways to satisfy each other without having intercourse. We are happy to do it now....apart from the fact that my best friend had sex twice a day when carrying her youngest and he turned out to be a bit.....wappy which they blame on the happy hormones lol

It seems that sex in early pregnancy especially after mc is not really recommended but it's individual choice xxxxxxxxxx

 

[deedee84]

hehe thats all i do kanga, keeps him sweet for a few days lol x

 

[CARNAT22]

My oh is on a sex ban too, we haven't done it since ov! when I was pregnant earlier this year he was on a ban too, we didn't dtd for around 3-4 months with all the problems I had after my mc too. I think they are quite understanding though, even though my oh does keep pestering me. Think I might have to give him a helping hand to keep him quiet! xx

I bled for the best part of 3 months before, during and after my M/c.

Oh was fine with it. As I was bleeding very lightly at points, we did fit a few sessions in - at my insistance

This time round though it's going to be a total no-no!

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[deedee84]

i did the same when i was pregnant with my DD though, i made him wait until after the 12 week scan and it wasnt awkward it was fine just a little scary lol! And yeah it is strange, i'm beginning to wonder if the professionals have got it wrong, i'm steering well clear of sex until after 12 weeks again haha!! xx

I was only going to wait until after the early scan LOL!

If I wait until 12 weeks it will be like being a born again virgin

Actually I will see what the Dr says about it all? As you say though they Dr's could have it wrong?

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haha you do it when you feel comfortable to do it hun, i'm just waiting until 12 weeks as thats what i did with my DD so ive just got it into my head that thats how long i'm gonna wait again!
Just makes me wonder with the profs as thats me and you now that have mc'd more or less after sex...wonder how many other people are the same :/ may mention it to midwife when i go and see what her thoughts are on the subject!! xx

 

[kanga86]

I bled for 13 weeks in total! I had a erpc op 11 weeks after I mc'ed naturally then bled for 2 weeks after. We manage a couple of times while bleeding lightly but I was bleeding quite heavy for most of it. Hard to believe at time that I went through it all! This time my oh will definitely not be getting any til 12 weeks, I'm not actually wanting it so makes it easier. Xx