A Mothers worry..

Discussion in 'Ask a Mum!' started by Red_Fairy, Jan 18, 2008.

  1. Red_Fairy

    Red_Fairy Well-Known Member

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    Just a quick question to see if my behaviour is normal...

    I seem to constantly worry that Hannah might die. When i put her to bed of a night all i can think about is cot death, and i have to check on her like 4-8 times in the few hours before i go to bed. Never really relaxing. Ive been known also if i wake in the night and cant hear her, i have got out of bed just to check shes ok. (or i cant sleep otherwise) (My OH goes mad when i do this tho lol so i reaaallly try not to now.)

    Part of me thinks its normal, natural mother worry type of thing, but another part of me wishes i wasnt like this, i seem to be making more work for myself (going up and downstaires with spd/heavily pregnant)

    Anyway is it normal? Is it somthing to worry about?
     
  2. Nic'n'Keeley

    Nic'n'Keeley Well-Known Member

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    When we first brought her home i was so scared of cot death but as time went on as long as i checked on her a few times a night and before i went to bed i tried not to worry about it.

    What freaks me out now is if i wake before her..(usually she wakes me up) i have this feeling in my stomach like i'm scared to go into her room but everytime (touchwood for the future) she is fine :D

    Another thing that worries me being single and it being just me and her here is me dying and it taking ages for someone to come to my flat the thought of her screaming cos she's all alone scares me so much so i've made my mum promise to ring me every morning by 9am and if i don't answer to come over.... :oops: :oops: :oops:

    I worry too much i think :(
     
  3. Red_Fairy

    Red_Fairy Well-Known Member

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    Hahha i do that EVERYTIME too! its reasureing to knwo that im not the only one tho :)
     
  4. trixipaws

    trixipaws Well-Known Member

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    i am SO like that! i thought it was just me bein a neurotic mummy! guess its normal then thats reassuring!
     
  5. Krystal

    Krystal Well-Known Member

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    I as just like this :( I used to get OH to check on him all the time cos I was too scared of what I'd find if I went to check.. I bought an andelg care monitor and got to say it's been an amazing purchase as it's totally put my mind at rest re cotdeath :)
     
  6. Tangerinedream

    Tangerinedream Well-Known Member

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    OMG Im like that too, then I feel like a bad mum for sending OH in :wall:
     
  7. Red_Fairy

    Red_Fairy Well-Known Member

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    hmmm :think: :think: then i wounder when it easers/fades? (not having to check every bloody half hour lol) I dont rememeber my mum being like this with me. :|

    I expected new mums to be like it, but was thinking i was weird that i still done it with my 8 month old.
     
  8. Krystal

    Krystal Well-Known Member

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    a few of my aunts and stuff I've mentioned the worry too and each and everyone of them has said that the worry never leaves you, I guess our children are the most precious gift for us all so we're bound to worry :hug: :hug:

    N&J - I was like that.. thinking I was a bad mummy for not checking but I just felt panicked each time :(
     
  9. Hells

    Hells Well-Known Member

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    My little girl is six and a half and we still use a baby monitor for her every night. :lol:
     
  10. lella

    lella Well-Known Member

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    When we brought our little one home i was so conscious of cot death and would lsiten to him breathing and if i couldnt hear him over OHs snoring i would get up and see if he was breathing several times night. my Oh used to go mad at me, but i said to him i always check cuz if the one time i dont he may have stopped breathing.

    He is now 7 months and im more relaxed but i still check him if i cant hear him. I think its just your instinct as a mother to protect your little one.

    And as for the bit about you dying, i havent been well lately with gallstones, i have to have an operation. Everytime i have an attack i give my Oh instructions about LO and how he is to bring him up. I dont care about me anymore all my thoughts are centre on my LO and if he is ok.
     
  11. leckershell

    leckershell Well-Known Member

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    I'm like this too although I have got better! I was really bad for it to start with but now I don't check *as* much. I'm quite a paranoid person in general though to be honest.

    We do this controlled crying thing if he is being annoying to settle, where we let him cry for 10 minutes on his own and then go up and check on him and then leave him for another 10 minutes and then after 20 minutes of crying we do take him out and either give more food/calpol etc. But it's when it suddenly goes quiet (he's fallen asleep) that I'm wondering OMG did we leave him crying when he was actually in pain and needed us and now something really bad is up etc. OH always breathes a sigh of relief when he stops crying as it means he's asleep, but I can't relax until I go up and check on him. I put my finger on the bit of skin between the nose and mouth, to feel him breathe on me.

    :hug:
     
  12. Kylie1007

    Kylie1007 Well-Known Member

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    No I'd say it was perfectly normal to worry about your baby! I'm paranoid about what illnesses he could get in the future
     
  13. Misslarue

    Misslarue Well-Known Member

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    :rotfl: :rotfl: omg you have just described me!!!

    I do all of that hun and more! I still check Dan constantly when he is asleep even though he's a year old. Up until he was 6 months (90% of SIDS is in the first 6 months) I would check literally every few minutes, it was exhausting! I would be scared to check first thing after waking up. I have calmed down quite a lot but I still check he breathing all the time.
    You are def not alone!

    I used to always sit in the back of the car with him so i could check his breathing. I still do on long journeys.........but even if I'm in the front I constantly turning around to check he's ok!
     
  14. Squiglet

    Squiglet Well-Known Member

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    :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

    Oh dear... I'm the same. I still worry about Tia and she's 8.. she's started crossing the road alone and she terrifies me EVERY SINGLE TIME... DH thinks its hilarious, but it's really frightening. Not to mention the constant worry of her contracting some horrible disease and dying or getting hooked on drugs... well it never really gets easier.. but when they are tiny its soooooo much worse..

    I find these video baby monitors laughable.. because you might be alble to see the baby but its nothing compared to running in there, checking their breathing with a mirror, and end up shaking them till they stir anyways.. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: yes.. I might have done this a few times.. :oops:

    This time I've got one of those breathing monitors....

    Cot death used to scare me constantly... and it's scaring me now and the baby isn't even here yet. :shock:
     
  15. Xena

    Xena Well-Known Member

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    I'm just the same. I still worry about Lydia in terms of cot death, only now there's a zillion more things like falling down the stairs that I worry about as well.

    And I worry a lot about Alex. If he's sleeping I have to check him ALL the time. Freaks me out if he's not snoring lol.
     
  16. Sabrina

    Sabrina Well-Known Member

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    I think we all do it to some degree. I check on George's breathing very carefully every night before I get into bed.

    I remember being the same with my first. I can't remember when I stopped but I definitely don't do it now - he's almost 18! LOL :lol:
     
  17. jenni32

    jenni32 Well-Known Member

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    I'm exactly the same , ended up buying an angelcare monitor which has made things a bit better. Also have a video monitor but I still check him a lot! Can't help myself.
     

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