10 months old and tantrums

[kumber]

Ohhh I hope he doesn't get louder, I've had a few embarrassing convos with the neighbours who have come to check if we're both ok cus he's been so loud! I'm looking forward to him being able to verbalise in a way we can understand, he gets so frustrated when he's trying to make us understand what he wants or needs.

 

[Durhamchance]

I had this with my boy at around the same age, it might not be practical, but I borrowed a playpen from a friend and it was a godsend. He didn't spend all his time in it, it was more for when he was playing up or I needed to do something and keep him safe. It was filled with his toys and books and he was quite happy in there (and couldn't grab the cats!)

I'm not sure why you got some rude responses on this thread Kumber, I didn't get the impression that you were trying to make out your child to be 'advanced' in any way x

Gosh, I'd be worried about putting him in a playpen, I did this previously when he was smaller and we had no carpets, and got accused of putting him in a dog cage and being more worried about the cats than him! I have thought about reconstructing the playpen but the living room is very small and it's a large Lindam 8-sided one which takes up most of the floor space. I wonder though if there's a smaller one we can get, especially one that's more easily stored? Or perhaps we can set it up in his bedroom once it's been sorted and furnished.

How about a travel cot instead?

 

[kumber]

Yes, great idea! Thank you!

 

[littlemonkey]

Don't feel bad about the play pen or travel cot. We also had baby jail up for a while. It makes life easier knowing your LO is safe while your backs turned and they're still learning boundaries. Personally I think it's a great idea for when the baby arrives.

 

[LaceyKeo]

If you put baby in jail for a bit to get something done, you're a terrible mother who abandons her child.

If you let baby roam the living room while you get something done, you're a terrible mother who doesn't care for her child's safety.

So.

You do you. Whatever works best is the right thing, and if anyone wants to question you on not/having a playpen, tell them nicely to please remove their unrequired opinions from your area, and carry on with what you feel works best. Xx

 

[Mummybexee]

I had and have this with my son - he's 14 months now and still has a meltdown when I say no!

Apparently at 1 year they are only just figuring out what no means and trying to over ride the urge - it's common for them to strop and get upset because it's frustration more than anything

We have a playpen so we can turn our backs without fear - the mornings when getting ready for nursery and work are stressful etc. And by god it will be a total life saver when 2nd baby comes along - we call it his prision lol - laugh about it - but only use it where necessary - he's mainly playing with us on the floor.

I must admit - your HV sounds abit odd. I remember your HV told you to stop every 45 mins on your car Journey is against all regulations they are told to advise ( the 2 hour rule )

I always take on board HV advice - but regardless I take it with a pinch of salt - don't take what she says for gospel as I can tell you for sure they all say different things unlike what daniowl seems to think!

Meal time wise wherever possible we always eat as a family. I find it important for social development aswell as him getting used to daily life. If when back from work there's not time to cook etc I always have good portions in the freezer and he will eat that and we will eat when he's gone to bed. Weekends we eat breakfast dinner and tea and have done since he was little.

 

[kumber]

I have 2 different hvs.

I think a playpen/travel cot idea is a good idea, I'll look into an easily collapsible travel cot.

 

[Syndilou]

Isabelle used to do this at this age, in fact she's go into such a melt down when I said no I actually found it hilarious. (Sounds awful doesn't it!!) I know it's already been suggested but I literally distracted her with toys and tried to engage with her! I have to be honest she's still doing it now and she's a year... I'm hoping she stops acting the princess soon!! X

 

[DaniOwl]

I had and have this with my son - he's 14 months now and still has a meltdown when I say no!

Apparently at 1 year they are only just figuring out what no means and trying to over ride the urge - it's common for them to strop and get upset because it's frustration more than anything

We have a playpen so we can turn our backs without fear - the mornings when getting ready for nursery and work are stressful etc. And by god it will be a total life saver when 2nd baby comes along - we call it his prision lol - laugh about it - but only use it where necessary - he's mainly playing with us on the floor.

I must admit - your HV sounds abit odd. I remember your HV told you to stop every 45 mins on your car Journey is against all regulations they are told to advise ( the 2 hour rule )

I always take on board HV advice - but regardless I take it with a pinch of salt - don't take what she says for gospel as I can tell you for sure they all say different things unlike what daniowl seems to think!

Meal time wise wherever possible we always eat as a family. I find it important for social development aswell as him getting used to daily life. If when back from work there's not time to cook etc I always have good portions in the freezer and he will eat that and we will eat when he's gone to bed. Weekends we eat breakfast dinner and tea and have done since he was little.

The reason one 'HV' sounds odd because I believe it's her mother from previous discussions with her on and off the forum. From the posts you've made I would change actual HV and get the other one to stop offering you advice - they are chatting absoulete BS to you.

 

[Lulu90]

Dani, may I ask why you feel the need to post her personal business on a public forum? You really do act like you're in the school playground. Jesus Christ, I'm only 24 and wouldn't dream of hassling someone on a forum. You have no decency, respect or class. She's a heavily pregnant woman, seeking some advice, if you don't like her/don't agree with the things she says, you don't have to respond. As we all well know, it is a public forum and everyone is ENTITLED to their own opinion, but I think you only give it to be petty, you don't actually care, you just like playing the game. It's quite sad.

 

[H16]

My LO went through a phase of having her dinner and then not letting us eat our in peace but we just put her in her high chair with lots of books and she would happily entertain herself for 20 mins while we ate. Luckily now she is a bit older we all eat the same dinners at the same time so she feels more included which solved the issue. I had the same issue of LO not really understanding the word NO when she was being naughty so I just kept persisting with moving her away from whatever she was being naughty with and eventually she stopped doing the things she was doing. Even now at 18 months she likes to try and push boundaries though and see what she can get away with haha and I am still telling her no sometimes but it is becoming less and less as she gets older. Some days she is a little angel and other days she is a little monster. I'm afraid I don't have any magical answers other than keep doing what you are doing and eventually it will pay off hun, it is so hard when they are little as you can't explain why what they are doing is wrong as they don't understand x

 

[Ella1979]

I'd use a playpen, travel cot, cot. We "Daniel-proofed" our living room as he's so naughty when it comes to touching things - tv is up high (currently just out of arms reach), fireguard is in place, there's basically nothing he can hurt himself on bar his own toys!!! Admittedly he never had these early tantrums. He was just really inquisitive and would ignore me when I said 'no' or would just smile. He had his first proper tantrum last week (17 months old!). His sister on the other hand had her first tantrum at 13 months old when I was watching Pointless while she was having her bedtime milk - she went beserk, kept saying "RaRa, RaRa" and bouncing manically in her chair and shouting and screaming until I switched to CBeebies!!!

I still occasionally use the playpen as I know my son is then really safe. My parents also have one for him so we can all sit for 10 mins or so and have a cup of tea without worrying.

Food-wise, I tend to eat breakfast and dinner with them both, which helps. I'll sit with them while they have their bedtime milk. Teatime (now) I leave them to eat with each other, but when I just had my daughter I'd sit with her and perhaps have something small like a biscuit or piece of toast.

I think the key is consistency. Saying no, perhaps following it up with putting your LO in a playpen for a minute to reinforce the no? It's so difficult when they're so little as they don't really understand fully.

 

[kumber]

That's a possibility Ella, kind of like the naughty step but not?

 

[Ella1979]

Yes, I guess so! My 3 year old is useless with the naughty step, she just calms herself right down and says she's fine and will be good and there's no need for her to be there! Nightmare!!! I'm still working out ways to sort her behaviour out, but I think for a younger child saying no and moving them away so they can't get to whatever it is, is probably reasonable enough.

Good luck with whatever you try! I have both of mine throwing tantrums now and sometimes at the same time! xx