will i cope? rant

[elliej]

arggh
today is a bad day. one of those where everything seems to be ten times worse than it really is, cept for me, it really is that bad. i just dont know how i am going to cope when LO arrives. i have less than 40 days left til DD and the nursery needs the plasterboard joins re doing, the paint redoing, the floor varnishing, skirting, cornice, arcitrave, and a door. not to mention furniture. i have all my baby stuff everywhere, its all filthy with dust and grime and there is no point cleaning it cuz i have no where to put it. the rest of the house is a renovation project, literally, no room is in a fit state to leave a dog, let alone a baby. i have cobwebs the size of tents, you dont want to kow how big the spiders are, i have so much rubbish Kim and Aggie would be horrified and i dont know where to start!!! this afternoon i just felt so down i couldnt stop thinking that i wont be able to cope looking after LO when she arrives. i have such a short temper at the moment i am afraid of myself. i havent the first clue how to look after a child and my DH is not in the slightest bit sympathetic towards my mood swings. you cant tell him its normal cuz he still has a moan and so i just dont bother to tell him if im feeling down now as all i get is 'pull yourself together' and 'well you wanted to stay here (in this house)'. i was so looking forward to the day when i would be pregnant and getting ready to have my first baby, i have wanted it for so long. now its nearly here i am worrying myself sick thinking of what a state my home is in. all i wanted was the nursery finished so i had somewhere i could go which was clean and done but every single thing we/ i have done to it has gone wrong. i cant help thinking it just wont get finished and i wont be able to manage all this. i can hardly tell her to stay where she is till im ready, but it does cross my mind i was stupid to think i was capable and grownup enough to do this.
sorry for the rant, but i needed to get things off my chest. any words of wisdom? i know im probably being stupid but i dont know what to do for the best.
plaese excuse me while i cry myself sick.

 

[spacehopper]

First things first have some of these

Right now take a deep breath and think posative. I know its hard but it will all work out fine.

Me and OH dont have a house yet and im worried sick we will be moving out last minute and nothing will be done.

Take it one step at a time and think to yourself that even if the rest of the house is not done the nursery WILL be done. The rest of the house can wait.

I know how you feel in a way because were the same and OH tells me get a grip.

I hope this helps and go have some chocolate

Heres some more of these for you

 

[elliej]

thank you spacehopper, need a lot of those at the mo, just feeling really lonely and tired. its stupid really but its probably the first time in my life i have felt this strongly about doing something right and it feels like i will be useless if it doesnt get done, but on the other hand i dont want to make myself ill doing it.
i really hope you can get sorted too. just noticed we are due the same day too. that is a nice feeling for some reason.

 

[spacehopper]

Oh yeah Thats made me smile aswell. Lets hope we have them the same day

Your not useless and it will be done. Your OH should be helping out and im sure you will have it done way before LO is here.

If not i will come round and help lol give me something to do.

xx

 

[nori]

aww hun.. you need to stop and calm down for 2 seconds. I'm already doing the panicing thing about the house being tidy and clean and went on a spree this morning and realised how knackering it is at my stage let alone yours! I was going to move house so i actually had a nursery but so glad i didnt as its just too stressful (now i just dont have a nursery).

Ok.. heres what i would suggest:

Concerntrate on the nursery first: Write a list of what you need doing and tick it off one by one. Also make you OH do most of it! I think when you break it down and you can see that things are getting down it doesnt seem so pointless. It was also the only way for me to get my OH to do anything and for me to stop doing everything! Some men work better by seeing it in black and white as they just dont SEE the dirt and grime like we do and havent a clue where to start!

Hope you feel better soon.

Claire x

 

[aramintalovegrove]

Babies arnt bothered by clutter, disorganisation, dust or mamouth spiders so if the worst comes to the worst and you are stiil in the state the house is in now, she will be fine.

I lived at my mums out of boxes when DS arrived and moved 4 weeks later it (as we were going from rented to buying) It took me ages to get sorted due to breast feeding being constant at that time and then going back to work early, but we coped and I had a happy and helthy LO dispite of everything.

We just get niggly at ANYTHING at this stage, if you had the perfect show home something would be wrong!

As long as its done by the time she can walk you will be fine, chin up take one day at a time and one task at a time and remember you are not going to be able to do everything before LO is here but there will be realstic goals you can do by then, even if it is just setting up a cot and having it in the middle of a building site!!

 

[elliej]

anyone who fancies a free holiday can come out here and help, my hubby works too hard to be bothered about anything else, and he hates the house anyway, so wont help unless i nag like mad and i havent the energy to argue with him. WHEN i get it finished i will show you the before and after, until then i will show you one of the house so you understand. dont ever think of renovating a house in France. it just isnt worth it.

the window above the front door is the nursery. please note, new roof (i did that tiling) and large hole in barn roof, which has since been fixed, (by me).

 

[bunnymom1980]

Have loads of these

Our house is the same, but we're slowly getting there. The baby's room was only painted and carpeted last week. We've got no carpet on our stairs and landing, all the woodwork needs glossing and the walls finishing off painting.

We've had to hire a skip to clear out all our junk. My mum and Dad have been over several times to help us and things are slowly looking better.

You'll get there hun, just tackle one room at a time as it gets overwhelming if you look at all the jobs collectively cos you feel like you'll never get anything finished.

 

[nori]

Aww hun.. Kind of get what you mean now! I was just imagining a messy new house with boxes everywhere.

I dont think my list will help.. Good luck!!

Claire x

 

[elliej]

yes, im afraid i did write a list once, but it was so long it literally covered a wall of the hall, needless to say it ended up in the bin. but talking to you lot is really good, i feel a little better now, and tomorrow is a new day, think i will give myself a few jobs and tackle it piece by piece. just hoping this baby sticks to her DD i need the time!