What a silly idea...

[Hayley1608]

After being on here and surfing labour and birth on the net i decided it would be a good idea to see an actual birth video as the only ones i have seen are the ones that are on shows like one born every minute which in reality im not sure show an exact picture of what it's actually like having a beautiful little baby tearing apart your area!

Well that was silly of me...

I have been so relaxed about the labour and birthing process and have really been looking forward to it! After watching these videos i can well and truely say that i am nothing but terrified about what I am (in a few short weeks) about to go through!

I was hoping for a natural birth with just gas an air and maybe using a birthing pool to labour in however after watching these videos I feel rather idiotic for even considering this as an option! I have the lowest pain threshold and cried my eyes out when getting a tiny tattoo on my wrist.

Now I have gone from excited and relaxed to petrified and anxious.

Any Advice?!



Hayley
xx

 

[HeppiBean]

Look at it in a different way hun...

You cry your eyes out over getting a small tattoo on your wrist?
Tattoo's are un-natural, it's not a pain our bodies were made to deal with.
Labour and birth on the other hand IS natural. It's what we are made to do!

I'v watched quite a few video's of births but I haven't let them get to me as I have just been telling myself that everyone's labour is different. Everyone copes in different ways. And everyone prepares themselves differently.

I'm preparing myself for the worst possible pain and ending up in hospital crying my eyes out by cm's lol. But I'm planning on having a homebirth and only going for gas and air once I hit maybe 6cm's... I've practiced breathing techniques when I've had pains from LO that have made me wanna scream, I've done the whole standing and swaying, kneeling, leaning, getting OH to massage my back. We've practiced all of that. And my MIL will be there as well as a helping hand from someone who's been through it all before.

You'll be fine hun. Just don't freak out xx

 

[tinytoes]

Silly , avoid watching labour videos . I scared myself badly last time . If your worried about pain I'd suggest arming yourself with facts about pain relief and deciding what you think you will need but be prepared for it too be tough work .The thing is as soon as your baby is born honestly that pain doesnt even matter it honestly is totally worth it xxx

 

[Xcitedmum]

Ohhh I so know where you are coming from! I did the same thing a wee while back and literally scared the bajaysus out of myself! I have since put these videos to the back of my mind as they really weren#t helping.

I have tried to console myself with the fact that women do this everyday and many go back multiple times. I think it is probably safe to say that EVERYONE is afraid but when it starts to happen we naturally click into the zone and deal with it as it comes. As Heppi says, we are built for this purpose. The key is to stay calm and breathe through it all.

Try to gain some confidence in your body and its ability - a tattoo is a different type of pain xx

 

[Hayley1608]

Thanks everyone!

It's great to have some reassurance.

I know that no matter what happens to me it will all be worth it when we see our little girl.

xx

 

[AbbyJ]

Aw Hayley, try not to worry, everyone's birth experiences are different and what looks awful for someone else might be totally different for you. I've had 4 babies, my first was long and awful, mainly because I went into hosp far too early and so was exhausted by the time bubs came. Second i got scared very early on and begged for an epidural..luckily they gave it to me and it was a wonderful experience, I was actually sat up in bed and able to watch my son being born, without any pain whatsoever. My 3rd was quicker still but my anxiety was back, i was so pre-occupied with getting another epidural that i got myself in a right state, which i think made it much worse than it had to be. My 4th was super quick, after having mild pains all day the painful part was only 45 mins..i only had gas and air but for some reason that time i wasn't scared and i just went with it. i discovered that my body knew what to do and i just went with the flow, it was by far the easiest birth, and i think that was because i wasn't preoccupied with worry and fear, or needing extra pain relief. This time i'm having a home birth and i 'm hoping for another easy labour..i know it sounds cliched but giving birth is what we are made for , your body knows what to do and will do it just fine..but i honestly believe that fear and anxiety cause you more pain..try to relax and use the gas and air to help you, i found with that i was able to really concentrate on each contraction, and kind of go into myself, sounds weird but it helped! x

 

[littlemiss83]

Uh - oh

Please stay away from those horrid videos - I have never in my life watched one and I dont plan to. I am absolutely terrified of going into labour again, i've been having panic attacks and making myself sick over it. The one thing helping is the little bit of hope that the 2nd is not as bad as the 1st. I struggle to even read the birth stories as it brings back horrible flash-backs - not everyone had as horrible an experience as me, but i'd say majority are not far off, and I didn't even need stitches with mine.

On the other hand, its good to be prepared, because in all honesty, it is as bad as it looks, if not worse. Your best to prepare yourself as mentioned above with what pain relief you will take and also as heppi said - prepare for the worst and anything better is good.

One good technique that helped me through the labour is to bear in mind that it isn't forever!! It might last days but it will end and the end result will be amazing. Also try not to go to hospital as soon as pain starts, as it makes it a longer labour, hold out at home as much as you can!

 

[suzzi]

ah bless you honey, never a good idea to watch birth videos as there all different and not how your labour will go, were all different and you may cope with pain batter than you think and actually have a good experience.

my 2 labours were very different from each other so expecting this one to be a suprise too.

just remember to relax. pain relief is there for a reason and if you need it take it.

and youll forget all about them videos when you go into labour!!!

 

[Hayley1608]

I feel much better after reading all of the above!

I have been reading up more and moer on different types of pain relief should i need to use it, I think my plan is to try to labour in the water and see how that goes with a bit of gas and air but after thinking things over and reading what Abby said about having an epidural I am definately no longer opposed to having one if i need to.

I think its quite common for first time mums to think that they need to be some sort of figure of strength and take as little pain relief as possible however after speaking to you guys and hubby I have decided thats rather a silly thing to think as anything that will make it less stressful for me and especially less stessful baby is definately a good idea if i'm not coping well enough.

Heres to an open minded labour!

Thanks Again,

Hayley
xx

 

[AbbyJ]

You're welcome Hayley, glad i could help put your mind at rest xx

 

[littlemiss83]

I feel much better after reading all of the above!

I have been reading up more and moer on different types of pain relief should i need to use it, I think my plan is to try to labour in the water and see how that goes with a bit of gas and air but after thinking things over and reading what Abby said about having an epidural I am definately no longer opposed to having one if i need to.

I think its quite common for first time mums to think that they need to be some sort of figure of strength and take as little pain relief as possible however after speaking to you guys and hubby I have decided thats rather a silly thing to think as anything that will make it less stressful for me and especially less stessful baby is definately a good idea if i'm not coping well enough.

Heres to an open minded labour!

Thanks Again,

Hayley
xx

This is soooo true - every 1st time mum wants to do it differently to everyone else.

 

[Hayley1608]

It is very true... Im not sure why we feel this pressure... I am just glad that i have overseen it!