Wahhh!

[paige23]

Hey ladies, I haven't posted on here very much but I just need to have a bit of a moan.

My baby boy is driving me round the bend!

I love my little lad so much but he has been a very difficult baby from birth!
And I don't know why!

When he was born all he did was cry, all the time. Even my mil was so shocked at the amount and severity of his crying and they have had a lot of babies in their family.

I was hoping as time went by things would become a little easier but honestly they haven't and the stress of it all is making me sick to my stomach.

He seems to be really unhappy most of the time. He doesn't cry like he used to but all he does now is winge and moan. I cant lye him down to change his nappy without a tantrum. I can't dress him without him screaming. I dread bath time because getting him into his vest and babygrow afterwards makes him scream until he stop breathing. He wont nap very well in the day. The only way I can get him to go to sleep is pushing him in his pram. He isnt a big eater really. He is slowly dropping percentiles, but my hv isnt bothered so I try not to be, plus he is as strong as on ox for such a skinny thing!

I spend most of my days outside walking around. Im sick of walking mindlessly. I try to make it nice by going for walks alongside canals and lakes.

I have never been able to hold him the cradle position for a cuddle, I can only hold him like this when he feeds. He just arches his back screaming at me and trying his best to wriggle free.
He loves being on his feet and grabbing things. But that is only short lived until he is crying again.
He does have a little giggle with me now and then when he is in a good mood, and it is so lovely, I really cherish those moments!

Bed time is a nighmare. I do a bath bottle bed routine. With the bath every other day. But after bath he cries like I said. Its almost like he knows its bed time. I do my best to distract him. He screams a lot at bed time. Tonight it wrecked my nerves. It just really upsets me that I cannot comfort him easily. For example, he would cry in his cot, I wait a min to see if he settles down, or stroke his head, pat him, shush him to get him to settles but he doesn't. So I pick him up for a cuddle, but 9 out of 10 times he screams being cuddled! Its horrible.

The past few weeks/month he has started waking in the night every 2 hours, sometimes every hour and a half. I know that they say there is a sleep regression at this age. But still it doesn't make it any better.

My sil had a baby whilst I was pregnant. Me and my oh were staying at his mums where she lived and he rarely cried at all. Ate really well, sleeped really well. He has always been so loving, would snuggle into his mums shoulder. He's now nearly 9 months and is still good as ever. We were there when he cried once and whole house was so shocked because they had never heard him cry before! I know its not fair to compare babies, but when all mines does is cry it really seems unfair! I wanted this little bubba so much and obviously still do but heck im still very shell shocked at how hard it is!

I'm sorry for having such a moan, but when will this end! I feel at the end of tether tonight.

 

[mrs_b_x]

First off, don't be too hard on yourself, you're doing a fantastic job and sometimes babies are just unsettled and that's no ones fault.

I don't have any experience but could it be colic? I know that can cause babies to cry a lot but not sure if it would still affect him at 4months as I'm not sure when it tends to stop. You can get things like colief which can help.

It could also be wind if he's arching his back?! I know when my little one was younger I had to burp him constantly, gripe water helped him quite a lot.

Another thing to consider is teething pain? There's lots of things you can test out for that to see if it helps?

It's so hard when they can't tell us what's up, but it's usually hunger, nappy, wind, teeth, tired! Maybe try getting something like a jumperoo if you haven't already if he likes being up on his feet? My LO went in his from 8 weeks (although it wasn't until around 4 months he would stay in it for any length of time)

If bath time is too stressful, don't do it at bedtime, save it for the morning when he's just woken up and is more likely to be happy rather than when he is getting tired.

And lastly don't worry about other babies, comparing them is pointless because they're all so different! For all you know ur LO will grow out of this and be a dream and their LO will hit the terrible twos and be a night mare

I hope LO starts to feel more settled And you start to feel abit better about it all. Xxxxx

 

[SpinSugar]

Oh hun. I can't see tickets so how old is he?

I could have written this word for word. My lo cried CONSTANTLY. everything was a battle. I couldn't take her anywhere. Baby groups were out of the question. I was just told. ...Some babies are like that.

I don't know if it helps but at 4 to 5 m she started to grow out if it. Getting her to nap in the day was a big key ( she didn't nap for the first few months. She'd be awake for hours and hours) and I cracked that with the help of a sleep consultant.

I found slings helped alot. Helped me regain sanity. And I'd try and visit people to get some respite as often as possible. Sometimes I just had to stand in the garden, leave her, and go cry myself. It's so hard. It's impossible not to compare. At baby groups where every other baby is sleeping feeding or just quietly alert. ... any there's your baby. Screaming and screaming. ..i feel for you.

And don't even get me started in cuddles. I can count in 1 hand the voluntary cuddles I've had from my 1 yr old.

If it's any consolation. Now...She's an amazing eater. Amazing sleeper (12h solid! !) And such a happy soul. But the first few months were shit. I hope your LO turns a corner soon.

Have you had any success with a dummy? Xxxx

 

[StaceyRainbow]

I just wanted to say sorry your having a hard time but the other ladies have give some great advice there.. Hope your little one grows out of it soon! Hang in there it can only get easier right!? x

 

[paige23]

Thank you for replying ladies.


I've tried, gripe water and colic relief things. I changed his milk once to a thicker one as hv advised it could be silent reflux. But he ended up in hospital for nearly a week due to severe constipation. So I stopped all the 'extra' bits and have just kept him on his milk for fear of something going wrong again (god help me when I begin to wean him! I'll be a nervous wreck haha).

He seems to have been teething from birth too. Always chewing on something with such force! Ive also been looking into a jumperoo, they look fun, so its worth a try!

He does love the bath though, its the getting dressed afterwards that he hates! Which I have to do at bedtime anyway so he is nice and fresh for bed. So no win there. I mostly try and stand him up to dress him or on my lap so its not as stressful for him.

He does have a dummy, which seems to sooth him slightly. I agree that getting them to nap has alot to do with it! And once they are over tired, you might as well put the earplugs in!

I have tried a sling too, he hated it so much he would just cry and struggle in that too, scratching and punching at me ( I know he doesn't mean it towards me but still it wears you down). And yep baby groups are horrid and going and visiting people is a nightmare unless we are out walking in the buggy because he cries so much. Went to vist the inlaws a few days ago and my fil held him and how much he cried was unbelievable! Like the whopper of cries. I felt so sorry for him (my fil that is haha).

Ive got a gut feeling that something isn't right with him though. Ive noticed that went he eats he goes all red and blotchy on his face and neck. He also gets really bad rashes on his face and body which we have creams for now. That combined with his fussy feeding and unsettledness is really making me wonder if he has a milk allergy or something. But when I think it I just feel like a hypochondriac which is why I havent been to the gp protesting. Im very close to it though mind!

And im glad you lo is better for you! Im holding on to that though to help me from going insane!

 

[mrssmith2011]

Hi there I hope your little one settles soon. My little boy has a cow milk protein allergy. He was diagnosed at 8 weeks old. He would scream if I put him down, wouldn't settle, was severely constipated to the point the only thing that cleared his was sipositories (sorry I will have spelt that wrong). he was diagnosed with his allergy at Easter. He was batting bottles out of my hand at 4 weeks old and screamed if he saw a bottle. If you would like to know any more please pm me and I will gladly answer any questions. Anything to try and settle your little one x

 

[paige23]

Your poor lo! Glad youve found answers! Sounds very similar to what's going on with mine!
Just a quick question or two. How did you get it diagnosed? And was it a struggle to get the doctors to take you seriously?

And I know suppositories (googled it haha) are horrible, freddie even had to have several enemas in hospital because the suppositories wouldnt fit in well
Poor babas!

 

[mrs_b_x]

When u say thicker milk do u mean comfort formula? My LO was on it for a while and it helped him a lot, the odd bit of water n oj (5oz water 1oz oj - only drinking around 2oz) helped to clear him out if he ever got abit constipated.

And yes to the jumperoo! Get on some fb baby selling pages local to you, you can usually pick them up for £30-40 near me so should be similar near u. It's a lifesaver! xx

 

[paige23]

Tried the anti reflux one, which caused the constipation. And tried the comfort one for a while with no change. And Ive had a quick look seems the cheapest is £40 so far which isnt bad! So ill keep my eye out. He does like to sit in his walker for a while propped a bit, its just keeping the toys on the tray for him, so the jumperoo will be better!
Might get to the docs on monday to see if they will do some sort of lactose intolerance test, just for ease of mind!

 

[mrs_b_x]

Defo sounds like a good idea with the docs.

I used to fold a blanket it up and wedge it behind LO when he first went in his jumperoo, worked like a charm! x

 

[JD.Deedee]

Sounds like colic, baby's tend to wiggle A LOT when they have wind stuck... I only kind of figured this out when my sister in law pointed it out when he was quite a bit older I'd say maybe even 8 months or so when it was hard to find his wind by rubbing his back when you hit the spot where it's stuck they try to move away from it in essence wiggle. My little boy never wanted to lie down only a tiny bit uprightish or on pillows he'd tolerate it. If only I'd knew normal winding wasn't enough back then it would've made it so much easier.. Once they get more in upright positions it will get miles easier in the day. Ask to see a different HV or go see the doctors for more advice x

 

[Melily24]

Eish.... shame man, sounds like you and baby are having a really rough time. I know you mentioned your HV said all is okay, but have you taken him to your doctor? First things that popped to my mind were - colic and osteopathy.

I know sometimes when a baby cries loads from birth for no apparent reason they go to a baby osteopathy person.Usually after a couple visits baby is a totally NEW baby, happy and no more crying. Look at www.cranial.org.uk. I have no idea if its this, but worth mentioning to your doctor maybe?

Big hug.
xxx

 

[paige23]

Thanks again for all the replies ladies
Just a little update since I posted this rant.
The day after this post I started to put Freddie down for his naps in his cot. Was such a struggle to begin with. Tried to let him cry it out a little with gentle shushs and strokes on his head. Today he has gone down for his naps like a dream! So fingers crossed this continues. But he is much more happy being more rested. And he only woke up twice last night!
We also have bought a jumperoo today and he loves this too, will bounce in it for a good while.
Have been to the doctors to and they are referring us to a paediatrician.
So all good news :

 

[mrs_b_x]

Aww yay! Good news! Glad he loves the jumperoo, they're so funny in them! Xx

 

[Mummybexee]

Glad to hear it! X

 

[Natalilly1288]

Only just read this but glad to hear things have gotten about better Hun it's so hard at times but remember ur doing brill b this won't last forever xzxx

 

[paige23]

I know this is a super dooper old thread of mine. But I thought it would be noce to give an update / closure on how things were with Freddie and perhaps it will help any other mummies out there going through what we did.
Hands down Freddie was a nightmare baby. Cried all day all night kind of guy.
But it does get better and wow looking back I can't believe how much life has improved.
Freddie is amazing! He is so funny and clever and kind in so many ways already.
Yeah we still have issues with sleep. He is still in our bed haha.
But things improve!
The tips I have gathered on the way are.
Do what you need to to get some sleep. Whether it is bringing the buggy into your living room. Or having a friend or relative take the screaming baby for an hour while you nap.
I used to take Freddie out everyday in the buggy it was the only way to stop the crying.
Go to groups with other parents and stick to them. We still go two or three times a week. It will really help them with other kids too when they get older!
I'm sidetracking now but I just really wanted to say how proud I am of myself and my partner of roughing through it, but it's all so so so worth it! They won't be this way forever ��