trying for another baby

[maria1976]

Me and my hubby were discussing today that we should try for another wee one when Ruby is 6 months old!!! I reallyw anted to wait a few years so I could spoil Ruby, but OH has done a good job trying to convince me.

What do you all think? Is this too soon??

M x

 

[clairescunny55]

i dont think theres a right or a wrong time, as long as you are both ready. Dont let him convince you if youre not 100%. if you do decide to start trying, then best of luck, and have lots of fun

 

[BeckyJ]

i said to OH the other day i want another baby, his reply was u need to have this one first lol

 

[kalia]

There are arguments for having or not having every age gap possible. So just do what is right for you as a family. For me, I want to have children close together in age so that they can play together. For others (like you) they prefer to spend the time with their child before having another. There is no right or wrong.

 

[Kylie1007]

Maria - your husband is not the one who will get any more stretch marks or any of the uncomfortable symptom associated with pregnancy! You should be the one to say when you get pregnant!!

We've just been having this discussion in our family because my cousin's wife announced that she was pregnant again when her baby was only 5 mths old so there will only be a year's age difference in them.

Personally I think she should have waited more time because
1. her little girl needs all of her attention while she is still so young
2. it takes a while for your body to get back to normal - I know that after 3.5 months I'm still not back to normal.

My nan (silly old woman) said that she doesn't blame my cousin (male) but she blames his wife - we said well it takes two to tango and he should have been equally responsible for contraception. However I would have hoped that if I'd been in that situation, my husband would have said "Are you sure you want to do this" and had a bit of consideration about me. My mum asked me when I'd ever known my cousin to have any consideration about anyone apart from himself...

 

[amzhunny]

hey i have been wondering this too..
MyOH wants to try again after we get married in May so Amber will be 9 months old and about 18-20 months between them. I am not sure either..i want to work for a bit soon and wait until Amber is a little less dependant on me...

Do what is right for you and dont feel pressured. My body is no where near ready to go through all that again yet and its nearly 6 months its still battered and i am still loosing the excess weight i put on!!

 

[Squiglet]

We've been talking about our next one...I've managed to convince DH to do it again...not that it took much convincing ...but we will be waiting until lil miss starts nursery. Having Tia at school has meant that I've had time alone with the baby to bond and bf which has been lovely

 

[tattybear85]

when we talked about it we said we would try for another when Oliver was 18months old as we didnt want a huge age gap between them so they could play together and as Oliver would be growing up he wouldnt get jelous of a new baby as there is 5years difference between matt and his sister and when his sister was born matt had a hate campaign going against both his sister and his mum to the point where he was writing letters saying he hates them(if i rmember correctly what his mum said) and took him a few months to come around to the idea!!!

 

[rachie29]

ideally i would like to wait until dd is 18mths before starting to try again...if i can convince OH that is...

 

[Redshoes]

I don't think ANY age gap is wrong, if you're ready, never mind what people say, you'll love all your babies equally, whether they're 1 or 10yrs apart Although just because your OH is ready it doesn't mean anything if you're not, very best wishes

 

[Red_Fairy]

Maria - your husband is not the one who will get any more stretch marks or any of the uncomfortable symptom associated with pregnancy! You should be the one to say when you get pregnant!!

We've just been having this discussion in our family because my cousin's wife announced that she was pregnant again when her baby was only 5 mths old so there will only be a year's age difference in them.

Personally I think she should have waited more time because
1. her little girl needs all of her attention while she is still so young
2. it takes a while for your body to get back to normal - I know that after 3.5 months I'm still not back to normal.

My nan (silly old woman) said that she doesn't blame my cousin (male) but she blames his wife - we said well it takes two to tango and he should have been equally responsible for contraception. However I would have hoped that if I'd been in that situation, my husband would have said "Are you sure you want to do this" and had a bit of consideration about me. My mum asked me when I'd ever known my cousin to have any consideration about anyone apart from himself...

accidents do happen tho. I did not plan my two this close together. Infact after having hannah i didnt want anymore.
I didnt have a period between babies, and straight after hannah i was refused the pill because they said 'we like to wait attleast 3 months after a child before giving this' I insisted and got the pill at about 6-7 weeks. little did i know (9-10 weeks later) i was already pregnant.
(wont bloody happen this time tho)

I dont look forward to all the work ahead. My 9 month old still dosent sleep through. But i have to look on the brightside, and in 2-3 years it'll be over with. where as some mothers then try for another, i wont be! (if you think about it they'll be doing the difficult bit for 6+ years by having a 3 year gap) were as im doing it for 2 in 3 years) nappy, bottles, sleepless nights will be over for good!

ack... ask me in a year and ill let you know how it goes

 

[bobtheunfortunateone]

I don't think there is a right age gap, but remember that it may not be the same type of pregnancy. I'm soo tired with this one, hard to sleep. I'm lucky I have a lovely 2 year old. He is old enough to understand something good is coming and is independent enough to help, but young enough not to get too jelous.

But you do get alot more tired at least if they are abit older they can understand why mummy is not giving them 100% attention.

Bare in mind just because they are close in age don't expect them to be close in relationship, 22 months between my hubby and his brother and they have never got on! But still did not put us off! We always said 2 and half years between them, (Got pregnant abit quicker) and then if we want another see how we feel when this one is 3 ish. All planned out!

 

[bonny]

i really want a having another, and iv already told OH that we will be having another.

We will probably start trying when isobell is a year old so we will have minimum 19 months age gap. That said we took 2 years to get pregnant with isobell so it could be alot more. My MW told me that your are most fertile in the year after you have had a baby but i reallyy dont fancy being pregnant whilst she is still under a year.

 

[maybebaby]

As you can see from my ticker we started trying when Austin was 9 months. This is the second cycle TTC. I would have loved to start trying earlier but OH wanted to wait a bit.

You'll know what feels right for you.

 

[BEX101]

We've been trying again for a couple of months now. I would love Rosie to have a brother or sister so close to her age. And i get loads of suport of OH because he gets a lot of time off for his job.

 

[moomoo192]

I can give you both sides...

I got pregnant with Jesse (#2) when Kirsty (#1) was 6 months old so there is only 15 months between them, it took about 14 months to get pregnant with kirsty so that was another reason we tried earlier as we thought it would take a while again but i caught 1st time. People said it was going to be hard, especially if kirsty wasn't walking, i'd be heavily pregnant and still have to carry her,i guess i was lucky as she started walking by 10 1/4 months , it wasn't as hard as i thought it would be from what people said, i think with a first baby you adapt around them but with any other babies they HAVE to adapt to your way. They are very close with each other and sometimes you'd think they were twins but they also fight like cat and dog but thats kids i guess. Potty training seemed to last for ages cause it was one and then the other and nappies seemed a normal part of my life, i couldn't remember life without nappies and wetwipes lol.

Had Ben (#3) when Kirsty was 7 and Jesse was 6, Kirsty was a gr8 but Jesse was unsure how to take to the baby, wouldn't hold him till he was about 2/3 wks old, now he is a godsend, they get on so well it makes me so happy watching them together.

When Ben was 20 months i got pregnant with Becky (#4), i knew i wanted a 4th but i enjoyed the one on one time with Ben so much, i did feel i missed out on this with the Kirsty & Jesse, i couldn't imagine it not being just 'us' anymore, anyway Becky is here now and ben was exactly like Jesse was when Ben was born, he didn't want to hold her or anything at first but has soon come around, now he goes up to her and kisses and cuddles her its lovely.

I do feel i missed out a bit on that one to one as the 1st two were close together, but also as they were so close they didn't wish the other one to grow up so fast so they could play together like my bigger 2 did when Ben as born, because he couldn't play, walk, talk, run etc they soon didn't bother with him untill he started crawling etc, thats more so when they started to interact with him.

At the end of the day, its your decision, you have the hard work, have to carry the baby etc and its your body it'll be taking its toll on.

Do what you feel is right and don't let anybody tell you otherwise.

 

[trixipaws]

i didnt plan to have kids until im in my 30's and altho this one arrived much earlier than planned, ill try not to pop any more out before im 30! im too obsessed with millie-pops atm to give up any of her mummy to another baby also im getting my figure back i dont wanna ruin it again
i think i would like more tho