Torn :-/

[jenni16]

Hi girls,
So deciding on a name that my partner and I both love is proving to be quite a challenge! We are team yellow which makes it even harder to decide on two potential names. He came home from working away a few weeks ago and suggested Isla for a girl.....I fell in love with it pretty much straight away, its the only name we both like at the minute so it's looking like a contender....
One problem though....I met up with two close friends this week and the conversation turned to baby names. As soon as I mentioned this name the one friend piped up saying that she has already chosen this name for when she and her boyfriend have kids (she's not pregnant and isn't planning on it for a long while yet.)
My question is, would it be totally wrong of us to go ahead and choose this name, knowing that she already has dibs on it for when she has babies??? I'm totally torn on what to do, I obviously don't want to upset my friend, but we're really struggling to come up with anything else!!

Wow, that was a long post!

 

[claire_louise9]

I would go with the name you want, seeing as you are the ones that's pregnant and she is not. Why should you please somebody else , you didn't know she liked that name so tough luck. The name we always liked for a boy we couldn't have because OH best mate named his kid it, so we just had to think of another one. She will just have to do the same. I say go for it.

 

[mylullaby]

No-one has dibs on a name. If you love it, then go for it. I quite liked Isla for my hypothetical child at one point but a) I would never have told anyone in case they chose it too and, like you, were worried about what I'd think and b) I now know 6 babies (including 1 family member) who have been named Isla so I'm ruling it out. One or two would be fine but I just know too many now - ha!

When it comes to names, it's your baby, your choice as far as I'm concerned. Do what everyone else does - have a think about it, throw a few names around and if you love it and you keep coming back to it then go for it. She can still use it if she wants to - or she can pick a new name if/when the time comes.

 

[SparkleBug]

Definitely don't worry. In all probability they'll move on to a different name when the time comes and you'll feel mad if you didn't choose it because of some weird 'dibs'. We've been unlucky with boys names, friends and family have snapped up our front runners but unless you've got that name on a certificate, it's fair game!

 

[jenni16]

I guess you're all right, it's no ones 'name' until it's actually given at birth.
I just know that she will kick off and cause big arguments about it, she can get really funny over things and there's no winning her round sometimes.
You never know, we might end up with a boy and not even need to worry about this at all.

Does anyone have any suggestions of other names we could consider? I'll feel better if I've at least considered all other options

 

[claire_louise9]

If she kicks off and causes an arguments over a name when she's not even pregnant that's her look out. At the end of the day you will have your daughter forever, friends come and go. You might have a boy and who's says she will have a girl. I wouldn't consider anything else if that's the name you and your OH likes, don't change it for her.

 

[jenni16]

So true.
I know if it was the other way round, yes I'd be gutted I couldn't use the name myself; but I'd still be happy that a close friend and someone I see a lot of will be using the name for their child, so in a way I'd still get to use it.
It's so difficult! I think we will end up going with it....if we have a girl

 

[claire_louise9]

I saw that you liked Isabelle but a family member named there daughter it. You had to get used to it and choose another name , they will have to aswell xxx
Like I said earlier my OH best mate named his son Liam which we wanted so we have had to change it , so we have decided on Lewis which is sort or similar .

 

[jenni16]

Thank you so much for your advice it's really helpful just to hear someone else's opinion.
I like Liam and Lewis, both names we've considered too.
I never thought it would be so hard to sort names out! Xxx

 

[ft90]

I say definitely go for it if that's what you like! My older brother and I have sons a month apart and my sister in law called dibs on the name Olly for their little boy and I didn't think much of it, it wasn't on my list so I though fair play and then we found out we were having a boy too and called him Caleb, so we obviously have different tastes in names and would have never picked the same.

This time we've chosen Reuben and I mentioned it to one of my best friends, she was pestering me even though I'd said we weren't spilling. Then she said "oh that has been our boys name choice for years." All I said was "ah well sorry" and left it at that, we're still using it. I've liked loads of names in my life but it all went out of the window when I actually was pregnant and looking, I chose totally different ones and I think a lot of people are like that.

Plus your friend could have ten boys and not a single girl! Calling dibs is pointless unless your baby is in your arms nameless! I'd say if you have a girl and want to use Isla, use it. Years down the line you could regret it if you don't, especially if she then has a girl and doesn't use it!!

 

[Jojo84]

Go with the name you like!

Also my chosen names I had "dibs" on were Joshua and issac for a boy and Cecelia and Louisa for girls but when our time came we chose Luke or Alexander or Jennifer or Lucy fir a girl. You never know!

 

[TaffyRose1]

I would agree with the others that you should go with the name you love. It may be different if she was also pregnant but the fact she's not I don't see how she can claim the name. Like others have said she may well choose a different name when she does have a baby or have a load of boys and you'd be gutted you hadn't used it. Plus you did say you liked the name first it's not like she said 'I like the name Isla' and then you chose it. My OH's 2 cousins are pregnant and we are all due within 2 months of each other so I've been trying to get an idea of the types of names they like just in case I fall in love with a name and they give birth first and use it but we seem to all have different tastes. The only issue would be we have chosen Theo Jack for a boy and I would be gutted if one of them used it as we really love it but I know one is having a girl and the other likes very American names so I don't think it'll be a problem xxx