Too much information!

Discussion in 'Baby & Toddler' started by minikins, Dec 16, 2005.

  1. minikins

    minikins Well-Known Member

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    Wondered what you thought about this topic, but personally I think there is too much information these days on TTC, pregnancy and baby care.

    I have found some information in these areas to be conflicting, unpractical and unrealistic and as I result I am not ashamed to say it made me a bit neurotic and paranoid and that's not good for mummy or baby.

    I remember when I first came home with Dominic, I was so worried about feeding and caring for him that every break I got (which was not many) I read various books. This totally exhausted me and I never felt I was getting anywhere due to the conflicting information in so many books. One day I just turned around and thought 'these books don't know my situation and my baby, so I am going to do things my way and use my mother instinct'. This was the best thought I had since Dominic was born and I wish I trusted my instinct earlier.

    Since then I have hardly read anything, I feel more relaxed about motherhood and am doing things at Dominic's and my pace and not some stupid book.

    Granted there are great things in books, but I think it can be better to find your own natural way with your baby and I thinks it's better to get some good information from books but not to follow them to the letter.

    When our mothers had us there was the odd snippet of information but they had to learn from themselves and they coped - ok I am sure not all was perfect - but they had to just get on and do it.

    What do you think?? Too much information or not enough information??

    :) x
     
  2. littlebump

    littlebump Well-Known Member

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    Hi Minikins

    I still feel overwhelmed and inadequate at times. There is certainly too much conflicting information - you really don't know where to start and what to read, and when you do, a lot of the stuff is so different from the last book you read.

    But when our mothers were having children they were getting a lot of help, support and advice from their mothers/MILs, which isn't so readily available now as it's more common to be quite some distance from immediate family. So I think that - while they coped without the use of copious books, the books sort of plug a gap that wasn't there 30 years ago.

    I'm with Kerry - I really love Tracey Hogg's baby whisperer book, and since reading it, I feel as if I can understand Maddie's needs more when she cries, and can often anticipate what's wrong before she breaks out into a full on cry. But I'm still at the bottom end of the learning curve. There seems to be so much to be stressed about - especially regarding cot death - I sometimes wish I knew less!
     
  3. Rosebay

    Rosebay Well-Known Member

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    I've actually hidden the books I bought on baby care from my husband now as he was getting paranoid and questionning things that we just felt instinctively. Advice from our Mums and from here has been much better. It's very easy to get totally anxious to the point paranoia otherwise and they do seem to change advice with the seasons!

    +++
     
  4. Sarah W Baby Belly

    Sarah W Baby Belly Well-Known Member

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    I did go out and buy the contended baby book but I haven't read it after reading what you wrote about it making you feel like a bad mother. How bad is that? Especially when you find out that the author hasn't even had children or the accompanying cracked nipples or sleepless nights, so what the hell does she really know? No disrespect but she hasn't actually done it.

    If I feel as if I need any information I am just going to do what I have done over the past seven and a half months. Log on here. The information is priceless and from real mums! What else do I need?

    I won't be buying any books.
     
  5. Hypnorm

    Hypnorm Well-Known Member

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    hi, i agree with minikins, i read so much info during pregnancy, and just after he was born, and there was conflicting advice and the midwives and Health visitors added to the confusion. now i am just 'going with the flow' as it were letting my baby lead me, i'm not worried about routines or trying to sleep through the night (though that is a bonus!!) i believe he will do that when he is ready... as with weaning i am taking that slowly and again letting baby lead.
    I think instinct has alot to do with it. trust your self every baby is different. i don't believe in text book babies.
     
  6. lauramumof2

    lauramumof2 Well-Known Member

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    Hi ladies,
    I would agree there is too much. I bought the contented baby book and in theory it sounds good and suited to a organsied life but in reality its better off as toilet paper. The baby whisperer programs are better I thought and I used traceys method for contolled crying with success. I liked the way it taught you to recognise the pitch of the cry and didnt advocate letting the baby cry it out. I have had minimal trouble with my baby and I would say to all mums find a routine that suits your family and stick to it whether its a few hours in front or behind. Jess is 18 months and baby no 2 is on the way.


    Laura.
     
  7. minikins

    minikins Well-Known Member

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    Giggle!

    Hypnorm you are right about Health Visitors and Midwives they all have different opinions and advice too. I remember when I just gave birth they all did my head in as they all said different things.

    Mummy knows best.

    Actually at times I have found this site more useful than any book as you know you are not alone.

    :)
     
  8. Sarah W Baby Belly

    Sarah W Baby Belly Well-Known Member

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    Ditto!

    I am only going to use this site for all my info.

    :D
     
  9. AmberNicole

    AmberNicole Well-Known Member

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    I haven't bought any parenting books, but I'll occassionally do some research online if there's something I'm curious about. No baby is exactly the same so I've found myself better off following my instincts as well. Ava is a pretty easy baby to read though.
     

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