Stressed

[xMillie]

Long term ttc'ers any advice?
How do you relax? What helps?

I'm only on day 5 of my second cycle since failed ivf and I'm feeling super stressed and not sure how to calm down and chill out.

It's very unlike me to get this stressed... I usually just have a sort of whatever "shrug" approach to it. Cause after almost 4 years I don't really expect anything to happen.

Just tried having a bath but if anything it made me think about everything a whole lot more!
I'm feeling so desperate and it's awful.

 

[andy2016]

I have the same attitude as you but totally know where you're coming from, the best way to see it is in the UK we have great access to good healthcare and in the end what will be will be and no amount of stressing will change anything.. Easier said than done I know!

I go through periods of stressing and periods of being chilled out and thinking if it's meant to be it will happen.

Sorry that's probably not much help, good luck!

 

[MrsS15]

I'm really not sure Millie. I need some of this advice too! I go through such manic stages of feeling I can cope I can do this, I'll get my baby eventually. To the next month I'm weepy and sure I'll never have a baby. I've been through a lot of shit throughout the years but ttc and miscarrying has been the most painful thing I've ever went through. I try to just keep myself busy and make plans, otherwise I could sit in and wallow most of my life. I don't really have any other recommendations! My hubby said he's going to start booking me in a wee massage for around my period to help cheer me up which I thought was sweet! A also find reading a good book a distraction but I'm a bit of a book worm! Xx

 

[xMillie]

thank you both for posting.


I need something to keep me busy I guess, though I'm easily distracted.
boo

 

[Crazycatwoman]

Maca root can help the anxiety, it helped for me x

 

[phonixgirl]

Acupuncture is great for relaxing, I booked a session when my sister told me she was pregnant lol. But other than that, I wish I knew. I think we are coming to terms gradually with the fact it will never happen now. I did want to take up a hobby like cross stitch or knitting so I wouldn't think about it so much.

It will happen ladies xx

 

[xMillie]

I'll look into Maca root, thanks!

Acupuncture looked costly when I looked into it before, maybe if the next day ivf cycle doesn't work I can convince OH that it's worth a go...


Sometimes I feel like it will just be me, him and the cat and that's ok... :/
I hope we all get our babies one day

 

[MoominGirl]

I had my first reflexology this week. Decided I deserve a chance to relax and some 'me' time. It actually did chill me out more than I realised so I think I might stick with it and see if it helps. Was also considering acupuncture but it is expensive. Gonna wait til the tests are back first I think. I also think too much. I find it very hard to switch off my brain haha so I've been teaching myself to crochet. Always liked crafty things when I was younger but now I claim I don't have time so I'm making time!! I'm also making a conscious effort to plan things to look forward to. Had some vouchers so booked a weekend away in Feb for me and OH. Will be nice just to get away together.

 

[xMillie]

I'll have a look into reflexology, thanks

Wish I could get into some kind of hobby or something to keep busy but I get distracted to easily
I did start reading again last year, finished a book and tried to move onto another but just can't get into it. I'll either try another book or give up lol.

Getting away is a good idea

Me and OH have never been on holiday. I had hoped the few nights we stay away after our wedding in Feb would line up with ovulation but instead they line up with my period
Just suggested to him that we could take a weekend away a couple of weeks after our day, he seems up for that
would be nice to get away from everywhere we know. Somewhere new!

 

[MoominGirl]

The reflexologist I have found has an interest in fertility. I'm aware that evidence of benefits are very limited so I thought if it helps great but really I'm just aiming to feel good about myself again. I decided new year, new me. I think me and OH have got caught in a rut a little bit. Sometimes I feel like all we do is work and sleep and in my case obsess about TTC so it's time to take back control!! I've also joined a yoga class. I'm also going to book a treat around the time AF is due so I've got something to cheer me up or celebrate with haha. Today we're going out for a meal since AF got me. Booked the table couple of weeks ago so I knew I'd have something to look forward to. Think I deserve a steak haha!!

 

[phonixgirl]

You sound like us! Yep you are doing the right thing xx

 

[MoominGirl]

Glad to hear I'm in good company!! We had a really nice meal. It was good to spend time together. Yes we did have steak. I think it was well deserved!!

 

[xMillie]

Hope the steak was good!


We just booked a weekend away in Edinburgh, a couple of weeks after the wedding, sadly not around Ovulation (a Rugby game put the price up on hotels on the weekend I wanted!) but its something to look forward to anyway! Going to go to Edinburgh Zoo to hopefully catch the Pandas which is something we've both wanted to do for a long time.

 

[Blondie_x]

It's definitely hard not to stess, especially on the worst day of the month - when AF shows up! I find that having something to look forward to helps. As the other ladies have mentioned, weekends away, events booked etc.