Hi, I know this is a very personal question but I am really worried about how sex is going to be after giving birth. Does it ruin it in any way? I am really scared that I will be stretched so much that I will no longer feel as good during sex or that he won't feel it. It may be trivial to some people, but I really need that closeness and intimacy with my husband and I need to know how much it really does effect a woman and what I need to do to help myself stay semi the same (if at all possible). Can anyone tell me truthfully what goes on down there after a natural birth?
sex after childbirth?
- Thread starter nickie.s
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Well I don't feel that I've stretched which I was really surprised about! I was imagining things to be really baggy down there and not very nice 
But apart from still feeling a bit sore where I had stitches I can honestly say things are fine For the first few months just take things real slow
But apart from still feeling a bit sore where I had stitches I can honestly say things are fine For the first few months just take things real slow I agree with Kina. I was cut when I had my daughter, and was worried about the stitches and things looking and feeling different down there. But after the stitches had healed, everything was okay. A bit strange the first couple of times, but with a loving partner, you can work through this.
I'm now with another partner (my DH, married just over a year), and he has told me he can feel no difference at all betweeen me and other partners he has had in the past.
I'm now with another partner (my DH, married just over a year), and he has told me he can feel no difference at all betweeen me and other partners he has had in the past.
Dee1985
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i feel i have stretched a bit, cant sneeze with out weeing ect
but sex is still good 8)
the only thing that changed my sex life is the fact i feel fat and wobbely and covered in stretch marks grrrrrrrrr.
no way im doing a naked dance for my fella
but sex is still good 8)
the only thing that changed my sex life is the fact i feel fat and wobbely and covered in stretch marks grrrrrrrrr.
no way im doing a naked dance for my fella
Hi Nicki
I was also worried like yourself, I thought how on earth could things be the same again after giving birth! After my stitches had healed we gently started to get intimate again and straight away my DH said that it didn't feel any different than before, although for me it was a little sore for a while, however now 5 months on I can honestly say that it's like before for both of us and it's not sore at all.
Don't worry, I'm sure you'll be fine as well. Not sure if it's helped me but I didn't hundreds of pelvic floor exercises during and post pregnancy and have never had a problem with weeing when sneezing (Dionne you poor thing, have pelvic floor exercises helped ?).
Lucy
I was also worried like yourself, I thought how on earth could things be the same again after giving birth! After my stitches had healed we gently started to get intimate again and straight away my DH said that it didn't feel any different than before, although for me it was a little sore for a while, however now 5 months on I can honestly say that it's like before for both of us and it's not sore at all.
Don't worry, I'm sure you'll be fine as well. Not sure if it's helped me but I didn't hundreds of pelvic floor exercises during and post pregnancy and have never had a problem with weeing when sneezing (Dionne you poor thing, have pelvic floor exercises helped ?).
Lucy
Hi everyone, I just want to thank you all for your responses. It has eased my mind quite a bit. I think I should probably start doing more pelvic floor exersizes, even though they are really annoying and you can't see any improvement! It will help in the long run.
All of you seem to have had stitches!!!!! Is this basically the norm? Should I be bracing myself for that now? One more fear to add to my childbirth list. I have read about third degree tears etc, but was hoping that most people do not tear.
Sometimes it feels like there are never ending worries in this area! I am sure it will all be worth it once I am holding my baby. It's just hard to imagine right now. Who designed our bodies this way!
All of you seem to have had stitches!!!!! Is this basically the norm? Should I be bracing myself for that now? One more fear to add to my childbirth list. I have read about third degree tears etc, but was hoping that most people do not tear.
Sometimes it feels like there are never ending worries in this area! I am sure it will all be worth it once I am holding my baby. It's just hard to imagine right now. Who designed our bodies this way!
Hi Nicki
I didn't tear - I had to be cut as Olivia was back to back and needed a forceps delivery. I was terrified of giving birth but when you're having contractions and you're so close to meeting your baby you just deal with whats going on. You may well not need stitches but in case you do I'd definately recommend you get some lavender oil and tea tree oil in ready - putting a few drops in a carrier oil then on a maternity pad really eased the stitches and helped mine heal quickly, also put them in your bath post birth.
I waited 3 wks post birth, I was too tired before then!
Lucy
I didn't tear - I had to be cut as Olivia was back to back and needed a forceps delivery. I was terrified of giving birth but when you're having contractions and you're so close to meeting your baby you just deal with whats going on. You may well not need stitches but in case you do I'd definately recommend you get some lavender oil and tea tree oil in ready - putting a few drops in a carrier oil then on a maternity pad really eased the stitches and helped mine heal quickly, also put them in your bath post birth.
I waited 3 wks post birth, I was too tired before then!
Lucy
Thanks Lucy. I don't imagine I will feel much like having sex at all for at least three weeks after birth, I imagined it would be months, but obviously some people can do it sooner. Good news!
Thanks for the advice re lavender oil for the stitches & healing.
Thanks for the advice re lavender oil for the stitches & healing.
I torn having Noah and had a few stitches, but at the time I didnt feel that I had tore or feel them stitching me, if the guy haddent told me he was stitching atear I wouldnt have known! As for things being normal afterwards, well it took a little while for the stitches to heal and the area would sting a bit, but bathing the area with a little salt water and tea tree really helped. Sex resumed as normal, with no erm 'widening' to speak of the muscles are still tight and I have no problems, in fact somehow I have found that my clit is a lot more sensitive, so when my OH plays with me first I can orgasm within one minute!! and it makes intercourse itself more sensitive.
i didnt tear and im so glad cos peein afterwards was bad enuff 
i was very self conscious the 1st time we had sex, and kept askin.. does it feel different etc etc but my oh assured me it didnt, dunno bout the 2nd time round tho lol!!!
i was very self conscious the 1st time we had sex, and kept askin.. does it feel different etc etc but my oh assured me it didnt, dunno bout the 2nd time round tho lol!!!My and my OH had sex about 2 weeks after I had kaiden, I had a natural birth and no stiches, if anything ive got smaller than larger in the love tunnel department, but Ive done alot of situps and pelvic floor exercises to get it back to normal, i actually over done them and made sex a bit uncomfortable, so ive stopped doing the pelvic ones and still do the situps. The only difference ive noticed it the opening of the vagina is more oval than round like before but the inside aint affected. I was a bit paranoid at first as theres a whole lotta jiggling goin on after youve had the baby, but if you are in a good relationship then talk about your concerns with your OH, as he might miss interpit the embaressment for you not wanting him my OH thought that, as I avoided it on a few occasions XkelX
XkelX
We were back to it 11 days after I had James. Natural delivery. Felt a bit odd but no complaints 8) Our sex life has been even better since he arrived so it definitely doesn't always have to be doom and gloom afterwards. Did lots of pelvic floor exercises from the minute he popped out and am pretty sure that helped healing.
