Hi I'm Jay,
This is my first post and I'm brand new to forums of any kind. I'm feeling a bit like I need to chat but don't really have any one I can or want to chat to.
I'm pregnant with our second baby, my wife carried our first who is nearly two.
Tonight she's really upset me with something she has said. She said she feels that I'm excluding her from the pregnancy and that in her opinion she did everything she could to make sure me feel involved when she was pregnant. Obviously I'm upset that she feels upset/not involved but also upset that she thinks I'm either not bothered or deliberately trying to exclude her.
I don't want to diminish how she feels, but I just don't get it.
I'm just 18 weeks. I've been suffering with severe HG since week 7 and I've been admitted to hospital on three occasions needing iv fluids and iv anti sickness. Thankfully for the last few weeks I've been on meds which are really helping. Her pregnancy was the polar opposite no sickness and she enjoyed it.
We are both very different in how we approach things. I'm free flow and very laid back, I don't have a plan for everything and can make a decision quickly. I also am not one for chat groups, forums or Facebook pages. My wife is the total opposite and in a lot of ways, that's why we work so well. She can be quite negative and defensive though which to me are the only things that sometimes get to me.
The examples she gave of what she did to involve me was taking pictures, she used the doppler a lot and told me when baby kicked so I could feel. She took a lot of pictures because she set up an insta page for her pregnancy. Which I am supportive of as she enjoys it, it's just not my kind of thing. I've literally only just felt my first flutters on Friday but you can't feel from outside yet. I've obviously told her whenever I have felt anything.
I know if she could have carried this one she would have loved to but financially it made more sense for me to. She also said she wanted me to be able to experience it.
I think some of her negativity towards what I am or am not doing to make her feel more involved. Comes from the fact I'm not enjoying my pregnancy and she would love to be the one carrying baby.
I just don't get if I'm supposed to change how I am to make her feel better/more involved, by taking pictures, joining groups etc or just point out that just because I approach things differently to how she would, doesn't mean that it is wrong. What can I do?
I'm feeling a bit lonely and sad.
Sorry for rambling.
This is my first post and I'm brand new to forums of any kind. I'm feeling a bit like I need to chat but don't really have any one I can or want to chat to.
I'm pregnant with our second baby, my wife carried our first who is nearly two.
Tonight she's really upset me with something she has said. She said she feels that I'm excluding her from the pregnancy and that in her opinion she did everything she could to make sure me feel involved when she was pregnant. Obviously I'm upset that she feels upset/not involved but also upset that she thinks I'm either not bothered or deliberately trying to exclude her.
I don't want to diminish how she feels, but I just don't get it.
I'm just 18 weeks. I've been suffering with severe HG since week 7 and I've been admitted to hospital on three occasions needing iv fluids and iv anti sickness. Thankfully for the last few weeks I've been on meds which are really helping. Her pregnancy was the polar opposite no sickness and she enjoyed it.
We are both very different in how we approach things. I'm free flow and very laid back, I don't have a plan for everything and can make a decision quickly. I also am not one for chat groups, forums or Facebook pages. My wife is the total opposite and in a lot of ways, that's why we work so well. She can be quite negative and defensive though which to me are the only things that sometimes get to me.
The examples she gave of what she did to involve me was taking pictures, she used the doppler a lot and told me when baby kicked so I could feel. She took a lot of pictures because she set up an insta page for her pregnancy. Which I am supportive of as she enjoys it, it's just not my kind of thing. I've literally only just felt my first flutters on Friday but you can't feel from outside yet. I've obviously told her whenever I have felt anything.
I know if she could have carried this one she would have loved to but financially it made more sense for me to. She also said she wanted me to be able to experience it.
I think some of her negativity towards what I am or am not doing to make her feel more involved. Comes from the fact I'm not enjoying my pregnancy and she would love to be the one carrying baby.
I just don't get if I'm supposed to change how I am to make her feel better/more involved, by taking pictures, joining groups etc or just point out that just because I approach things differently to how she would, doesn't mean that it is wrong. What can I do?
I'm feeling a bit lonely and sad.
Sorry for rambling.
