really down

[HelenJ]

Hello ladies,

sorry for this post but I am feeling so so down today. This is day ten after my miscarriage ( had the tissue removed in the hospital) and I am still bleeding (not an insane amount) but since I am only allowed to use pads now and with the hot weather I am getting really frustrated. It is so warm and itchy and I am just so fed up with the bleeding. Many hours there is nothing and then all of a sudden a gush of it (so I cannot wear pantyliners).

My temperatures are still high and I did an ovulation test just now (because I don't have pregnancy tests anymore) and it came up positive-ish. Meaning those f*cking hormones are not gone yet which also means I am not myself, feel like the baby and my body have been stolen.

I feel down a lot and was hoping the hormones would be gone by now (the doctor said it would drop quickly). So basically I am feeling emotional, crappy about the bleeding and the heat, annoyed that hubby and I cannot do anything and the fact that the bleeding doesn't stop+high temps means nowhere near ovulation.

Why does this suck so much? Is there anyone else who feels the same or am I just overreacting?

thanks in advance.

xx Helen

 

[jojo3972]

aww helen (((hugs))) the way ur feeling is natural i was exactly the same altho this time i only bled 1 day after n that was it but the mmc before that and with erpc the same i bled for almost 3 weeks on and off it was a nightmare altho i wasnt tracking my hormones as was on holiday 2 weeks after erpc in greece so was relaxed and just got on with it but this time i have been tyracking and i only got a negative preg test last week which was 4 weeks after erpc but i also got a wat i think was possitive opk cos as long as the hcg is under 1000 ur body will ovulate and the last few preg tests i did were mega faint so was little hcg in my body then, i just dont know where the hell i am at the moment well not 100% it takes time and all goes on how far u were and when u have erpc it takes longer for the hcg to get out ya system and i know this sucks but u will get bk to normal and soon, i have gd n bad days and i felt like u that i had been robbed and life is shit why me and my baby why why,it does not help that hormones are flying around all over the place this makes us feel even shitter only this past week i have felt normal again and not a crazy woman wanted to kill everyone,take it easy and take care xxxx

 

[Rednursie]

Oh Helen, you are not overreacting Hun. What you are going through sucks, plain and simple. It's just cruel. I felt exactly the same when I lost my little one. I was so frustrated that I couldn't 'fix' my body or get my body to do as I wanted. As hard as it is the only thing you can do right now is be patient. Your body's going to do what it wants (unfortunately) What you can do is look after yourself as best as you can. I know you must be feeling so raw right now. But maybe your body is doing this to give you a chance to absorb what's happened before anther pregnancy? I know that's no consolation though but maybe a reason. Sending you a massive hug, I really hope your hormones settle down soon and you start to feel a bit better xxx

 

[tinselcat]

Hi helen

So sorry to hear you're going through this bad time

As the other ladies have said you're not over-reacting, grief takes us all in different ways and you have just lost something very precious

xxx

 

[netty]

you can feel however you need to feel to get past this sweety, its a part of the grieving process

so sorry for your loss

 

[HelenJ]

Thank you all for e lovely replies. It just feels to me that I am not allowed to feel down since it has already been some time sce it happened. I know I don't sh to people how I feel and I don't want the sympathy but just feeling strange for not being very sad but being down that I want my body to settle down. It just seems like people think only two weeks in nothing and that I shld be patient but it feels likeforever and that it will never end at the moment. Still bleeding today but not so down luckily.

 

[netty]

sweety its been 9 months for me and I still get upset

 

[jojo3972]

helen i was upset,angry confused all sorts of emotions but after i had calmed down a bit the when will my body be bk to normal again set in and i have been in tears cos while ur body is not bk to normal u cannot get pregnant and this is what i wanted but then i realised my body needs time to get over this aswel and its been 6 weeks now since mc and 5 since erpc and today i actualy think i have got my first af so feeling better about everything and just a little bit of time and ur body will be right as rain and strong enough again,take care and if ya want a chat just pm me its fine xxx