Partner working away? (O/T)

[lmarszall]

Hi all,

My Fiance has been asked to go and work in Germany for a week or two in 6-8 weeks time.

He has asked what he should do. As he will stay if i want him too but it is more money and a good opportunity for him. I don't how things will be then. The baby could be anything from 3-4 weeks or 8-9 weeks old. And i have no idea how i will be coping then.

What do you reckon, would you be happy for your partner to go away for a week or two at that stage. I will have my mum around so i wont be entirely on my own.

Lau
xxx

 

[topbird]

That is a tough one...

I personally would rather he didn't go if it was my DH, but then I am a bit of a wimp.. he is away for 2 days at the minute and I miss him terribly! But if it is a good opportunity and more money etc... then maybe he should

(sorry really not very helpful! )

 

[Nicola]

I'd kinda echo what Topbird said, I'd hate it personally but then you have to weight up the career opportunity (long term effect that will have if he gains the overseas experience) plus the extra money with a newborn would be warmly welcomed. Mind you I know you have other support locally, I don't have that here, it's very much just DH and me! Really, no help either I suppose I'd just suggest you weight it up properly, would not going dent his future promotion opportunities, would going mean a possible raise/promotion in the future? Would the experience qualify him to apply for a differet job/position with another international company type thing. I can see pro's and con's to both going and staying. Tough one honey I think you need to really sit down and chew over the plus and minus points on that one.

 

[Julie33]

That is a tough one . If it were me I'd be OK with it as long as he was definately here for the birth - he won't want to miss that.

I've got a good family and friend support network so I think I could cope with the baby for a couple of weeks. I'd miss him alot but we'd be greatful money It has to be you and OH's choice tho.

If it helps you could think about the women who don't have partners and most of them cope just fine from day one.

 

[bizzygirl101]

i agree with Julie, but it is hard to know how you will be feeling then.

I think that if he is there for the birth and the first few weeks and you have suffucient help and support from elsewhere then thats not too bad, if it was me personally then i would let him go as long as it wasnt longer than 2 weeks

 

[*saulino*]

Hi

I never want my OH to go away, the only one time he did when i was pregnant with Kiara i cried and cried and didnt sleep.
But im sure the two of you are the only ones that can decide what best good luck
Katrina

 

[trixipaws]

i personally wouldnt want my OH away, even though we dont hav enough money but its a very personal choice. good luck

 

[mamichuli]

I dont know, seems like a tough one, but if you have Mum and good support network...How does he feel about it? Does he want to go? I think it might be good if you could wait to make the decision until baby is born, is that possible, or do you need to decide immediately?
This is certainly difficult for you ,
Lisa

 

[Sabrina]

I agree with Lisa. If you have a good support network you should be ok as you'll likely be in some sort of routine by then.

I wouldn't want my OH to be away if it was near birth time but aside from that I know I have my mum, dad, sister, son, etc to help so I'm sure I'd cope. Let's face it - the money probably will be really useful at that time.

 

[OverTheMoon]

I can understand your dilemma as my husband used to work away a lot. My thoughts on it are, just remember if baby is only about 3 weeks old your hormones will still be all over the place. Its good that you have family around but if he does go I would ask my mum to stay overnight at least a few days a week so you can get some help with the night feeds and early mornings. If you can have that kind of 'full on' support then i would say reluctantly yes, if the money will really help you. Oh and make sure when hubby comes home that he catches up on lots of the night feeds and gives you a lot of pampering!!!

 

[lmarszall]

Thanks for the advice.

I think i will be ok if he goes as long as it is only 2 weeks maximum. I will have my mum and sis and his mum around and the money will come in handy!

Thanks for the views is interesting to know others opinions!

Lau
xx