Not enough support

[HannahBubble7]

Grrrrrrrr my oh is driving me mad !!! I really don't feel like I'm getting enough support from him at all ! I thought I was getting PND but I seemed to be feeling a lot better last week and this week . When I was feeling better I told him he wasn't supportive enough and he accepted it . I have been feeling awful today and i told him lylah was acting up and I couldn't wait from him to be in from work . He kept ignoring everything I was saying about her crying a lot today and me not happy . So when he got home, I said to him and he started all the how am I not supporting you crap !!! Fucking hell why do men not have a clue !! I'm at the point I don't know if I want to be with him ...but I'm scared not to be ! Uch sorry just needed a moan before I punch his face in !!! Xxxxx

 

[BevG]

aww hun its so hard isnt it, we have all the responsibility and their lives just carry on as usual. i wish i could suggest something. maybe set up a schedual for him to do a few jobs / activities with lo. my oh deals with bathtime and some night feeds. when you need help ask and try to get a bit of time for yourself if you can. maybe a date night too relationships change and often suffer when you have a baby. xx

 

[leannesxb]

hun it is like I wrote this!!! I can't offer you any advice but can give you a virtual hug (wish it was the real thing). I know exactly how you feel.xxxxxxxxx

 

[My1stBaby]

Unfortunately I think most of us have a bit of this going on!! Men really don't get how hard it is for us-physically mentally and emotionally!! And I don't think they ever will. You just gotta hope yopure wth someone that helps when he's asked, my oh has helped a lot today but I actually think my mum has text him to kick his arse into gear lol I felt like I was bringing a baby up on my own but I didn't ask him for help I got to a point where I couldn't cope n now when I really needed it he's helped a lot.

Your OH needs to help you out or he should be shown the door! Its not fair to keep going on your own and not be supported, PND can still happen at any point and feeling like you're unsupported can trigger it. Good luck hope things improve for you lots of love xxxx

 

[jojo_2012]

Can you leave him with baby just for an hour or so when she's overtired, just as a taster? I don't get any help either but just the acknowledgement of how hard it is helps.

 

[AugustMum]

I remember this feeling well its not just your OH, most men struggle to understand how hard a baby is or understand how much the dynamics of a relationship will change. Give it time and ask him to help more but be specific. Say you will be spending 2 hours to yourself (like having a bath or a sleep etc) and just say you want him to take over as you need the rest. Short and simple. They like it that way.

My OH was exactly the same and we went through a huge huge rough patch (luckily we weren't living together anyway) but now he's amazing with our LO. It does get better! (usually lol) its just stress has a massive part to play from everyone's side.

 

[Olive]

Unfortunately Men really don't get how hard it is for us-physically mentally and emotionally!! And I don't think they ever will.xxxx

Agree. I don't think it's intentional tho. Unless you spend 24hrs a day with your bub, carry it for 9 months, get up at night etc I think it's impossible to understand how it is! Doesn't stop it getting to you sometimes tho hope you're ok xx




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