Nervous about everything changing.Scared :(

[scaredbuthappy]

Im 34 weeks pg at the mo. I dont feel too excited really about having my baby
I do really want her and i love feeling her move around in me but i just dont feel excited. Im not really worried about labour im more nervous about how i will feel after and how i will cope with everything. Im not very good with change, i like things to be familiar and if they arent then i get anxious and panicky.
Im worried i wont love her like i should or feel excited when i bring her home. I love babies and always have, ive wanted a baby for as long as i can remember but now its happening to me im scared. Im nearly 26 and in a stable relationship, my partner is great and i have a supportive family.
People say their whole life changes and i know that it will change but what if it changes in a bad way and i feel like i wish she wasnt here I dont want to look at her just like a blob that i have to take care of. I think of little things like when im by myself and i cant cope or that i dont have time to myself to even take a shower etc or make lunch. That sounds horribly selfish but all im imagining is now my life will be non-existant and i wont ever be able to do the things i used to and all my days will be consumed with is the baby, nappies, feeding, crying, sleepless nights etc and i cant seem to focus beyond that, my life is simple at the moment and i know it wont be soon.
I really want my baby more than anything but i feel like crying when i think of what things will be like when she is here because i dont know how i will feel. Im even confusing myself with what im thinking at the minute, i want to meet her and hold her so much and i would be completely devastated and empty if anything bad happened to her but at the same time i feel like i dont want the worry and uncertainty of everything I feel horrible and guilty for even thinking any of these things.

 

[BabyMagic]

I am sure that there are many other mums-to-be who have similar thoughts to yours. I read quite a while ago that those pregnant women who question their becoming motherhood are often actually better than those who expect things to be smooth.

Being a mum can be a bit challenging at times, particularly when the little one cries. Having said that our instinct will enable us to look after and love our children. Why would every mother otherwise think that their baby is the most beautiful baby in the whole world? I hope you will be pleasantly surprised when you first meet your baby!

Change can be scary but also SO very rewarding, particularly when it comes to having a baby. Remember you are not alone. There are plenty of support groups for new mums. You can also speak to your midwife etc.

Good luck

 

[trixipaws]

omg u sound like me when i was preggas

my baby was not planned and i had no interest in kids or babies whatsoever b4 i got pg and i cant even begin to tell u the sort of person i was b4- really, really, REALLY not the type to be a mother, i was the unlikeliest mum ever i thought, because as u said i wouldnt have wanted this 24/7 responsibility, it gave me cold sweats just the thought of not having time to shower, do my make-up, or have to interrupt my precious sleep and not be able to go out and do whatever the hell i wanted!

so for those reasons, i was petrified of getting PND and/or resenting my baby.

im sorry iv no advice, as i dont think there was anything i did to escape that happening- i think i was just lucky. im just posting to let u kno ur not alone i kno where ur coming from

im amazed at how iv adjusted, and i think iv amazed all my family too- and i kno iv amazed my boyf he's admitted it!
i hope ur lucky like me too, im sure youll amaze urself too

 

[Jade&Evie]

I was worried too. I'm 19, my friends are all out clubbing and having a laugh and I was shit scared I was going to end up hating my baby because I couldn't go out.

Now she's here I would give up everything for her! My OH takes over for a bit to give me time for a bath and to do my hair and TBH she sleeps most of the day at the moment so I can take things slow.

Being a mum is the best thing in th world- as soon as you see your baby you'll know what I mean!

 

[scaredbuthappy]

Thankyou everyone. Im feeling a bit more positive today although my partner is at work at the minute so im all alone and wondering what it will be like when she is here Maybe i should just go to bed
Thanks again it helps talking about this stuff and to people who are in the same situation or have done it already

 

[Steelgoddess]

Im going to assume you're a first time mum? I think that in itself IS very scary i think its the thought of not know how things will be i know what u mean in a sense... I want everything to be perfectand ideal but realistically that cannot always be so... Just remember you will be just fine give yourself time to adjust and just take everyday as it comes...

 

[clarey]

I think its normal to have all those feelings, its a major life change and you would have to be a saint to not wonder if you will ever have time for yourself again. It IS hard work but its sooooo worth it, just take it day by day and after a few weeks you realise you can still do a lot of stuff you used to, you just have to be a bit organised and time it right! I usually go out with Eva in her pram while she has her afternoon sleep, i know i have about 3 hours which is plenty long enough for a wander round the shops or to go for lunch with friends and i feel much happier for doing something 'normal'. The bonus is i always have my little friend with me now so I also feel a lot less self concious sitting in cafe's or parks alone, and babies are a fab ice-breaker - everyone wants to chat and coo over her lol

you will be fine hun, dont be too hard on yourself

 

[loz]

I was quite scared too, but it is the greatest thing that you can ever do! Being a mum is fantastic - it is hard work, but also wonderful. You meet lots of new people and can still go out if you can get your OH to help out with bottle feeds and family to babysit to let you both go out. You just have to see yourself as a family unit now.