ClaireBear22 is right, its all guidelines.
I am a dad by the way and I feel for your husband. It was tough for me the first time round because I didn't want to crowd my wife with our new baby. I just made sure I was making the tea, bringing her what she needed and telling her to rest when she could. I just gave her space.
The first few times I took care of Sophia when she was just a little baby were so weird. I was worried that I wasn't doing it right but she just sat there gurgling away at me so she must have been happy!
Back to the guideline thing... We had our second baby 4 months ago and I was amazed that compared to the amount of visits and advice we had the first time around, this time we had two visits for weighing and that was it! I kept asking my wife when the midwife or health visitor was coming next and I couldn't believe we were just left to our own devices like that.
I think most of the advice and guidance is aimed at those who cannot take care of themselves, or maybe need that extra bit of monitoring (i'm sure you know the kind of person I am talking about). Most of us actually know how to do it, we just need to feel our way a little bit as we go.
You will try to clean everything, wash everything and worry about what goes near your baby but eventually you will probably tire of it and not bother. The obvious things like dogs licking faces and stuff still stands but they will touch things, dribble over things and put fingers in their mouth. Its all good for them as it builds up their immune systems.
Something that I read the other day will freak you out - parents actually arrange Pox Parties. They get their children together with other children with Chicken Pox so they all get it early on and it over and done with. I had no idea, how worrying it that???! 
The key to this is that no child is the same and no parent is the same. Follow the guidelines you get from your surgery or health visitors. There are so many different website out there that tell you to do different things that contradict themselves. All you need to do is find out what works for you.
From how my wife often feels and how I feel as well, if you find yourself getting so upset by it all, remember you are not on your own and there is always someone who can help. I would talk to my GP just to make sure I was feeling all the same things that everyone does in your position.
Babies are tough little things. Don't think any less of us but one time ours rolled off the sofa on to the floor
. No tears, no fuss but a lot of disappointment in us for letting it happen.
Then the usual things happen. You will be used to your baby not reaching out for things or grabbing stuff but all of a sudden one day they will and it'll be a cup of tea or bowl of hot soup. There will be tears and there will be holding a hand under the cold tap for a while (theirs, not yours...) but its all part of growing up and learning.
Sorry this was such a long post and the over use of smileys, I bet it made you forget about washing stuff for 5 minutes!!
Despite all my advice above I still worry and now our eldest is off to nursery twice a week I worry even more. Is she being looked after? Will she fall over? Will another child hurt her? Its perfectly natural.
Take care
Stu
hun xxxxxx
