Mixing with other kids who are ill....

[Lou]

Hi

Simple'ish question. If you went to a playgroup and there were kids there who always seemed ill with coughs and colds would you still take you LO or would you say something about it? I don't want to elaborate on this anymore because I don't like talking about people behind their backs, I just need advice and don't want to upset anyone at playgroup but I have to put Isaac's health first right but I don't see why he should miss out and us not go anymore because some mums insist on bringing their kids even when they are obviously ill.

 

[Princess_Puddles]

I would still take them. Harrison is one of them children who is always ill, well he has been for the past 2/3 months its one cold & chest infection after the other. Ive taken him to the Doctors and he's told me it's normal for a child his age to catch alot of things esp now he is mixing with other children at nursery his immune system is still building up. Personally I think it would be rude to say something to someone, I know I would tell someone to mind their own business if they said something to me about Harrison but if you think their child really isn't well and they seem not bothered by how ill their child is then yes maybe say something but I know with Harrisons nursery he is still allowed to go when he has a cough/cold/virus/certain infections, I don't think its fair on a child to be taken to nursery/playgroup if they are really poorly though, Harrison has had quite a few days off because the first few days of his cold is always the worst where he is feverish etc.. and he isn't in the mood to play so it wouldn't be fair on him or the other children. Hmm I'm not sure if I'm much help and I know you said Issac goes to playgroup and it may not be the same thing as nursery but thats the only reference I have as Harrison cannot go to playgroup yet.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

I dont think mums should take their kids if they are sick, but if they are gettintg over a illness thats not going to make other children then i dont see why not.

Im in the sme school of thought with you on this one lou, I have to put my kids health first.

Sick kids should be kept at home until their getting over it.

I once took stephen to a playgroup years ago and there was this other boy that was obviously very ill, snotty nose, coughing the works so i packed stephen uo again and said i was off and i wasnt allowing stephen to mix with il kids and got some right dirty looks - never wewnt again.

 

[Lou]

Its hard isn't it because I don't want to upset anyone but Isaac needs me to protect him. I know kids have to be exposed to a certain amount of dirt and germs but these kids are always ill and are having tests. The last thing I want to do though is upset their mum, she is nice but I'm seriously worried about it . OH just says if I have a problem I should speak to her

 

[Xena]

I dont think mums should take their kids if they are sick, but if they are gettintg over a illness thats not going to make other children then i dont see why not.

Well if you have a cold it is contagious until it has fully gone. Even if you're getting over it, unless it's fully gone, it's contagious.

The question is whether or not parents should be bothered about that.

 

[beanie]

a cold doesn't really bother me, however if it was something like chicken pox or measles then I would question why they felt it appropriate to bring them into a group with other children (saying that I wanted Seren to get these over and done with and despite the notices at nursery saying that there was chicken pox doing the rounds she never got it)

 

[emma28]

If they are leaving huge great greeners all over the toys, then yes, i would be most certainly p1ssed off.

It's other kids behaviour and lack of parents actually watching their kids that gets me really at our toddlers though.

Someone should take charge and enforce the rules....mind your child, don't bring them when they are contagious etc you'd think it was common sense

 

[Sarah&Braydon]

Braydon is asthmatic and is always coughing, etc, iv now shown him to put his hand over his mouth, but one day someone had a go at me for taking him to childplays whilst he was ill, and she had a a right go at me, didnt realise the reason he had been coughing so much was coz his asthma

i think it really depends hun coz there could be another problem like asthma which u cant catch difficult one !

 

[LucyBee]

Personally, I always keep Tom away from any playgroups when he is ill and that means a cold/cough/anything.
I feel like giving up though as every time we go, there is always at least two or three children there who are snotty and bunged up or have hacking coughs. Tom's caught so many colds from playgroups and it irritates me so much.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

I dont think mums should take their kids if they are sick, but if they are gettintg over a illness thats not going to make other children then i dont see why not.

Well if you have a cold it is contagious until it has fully gone. Even if you're getting over it, unless it's fully gone, it's contagious.

The question is whether or not parents should be bothered about that.

Yeah fair enough Xena, but my answer to that is within my answer - I am bothered by it personally which is why i dont let stephen go to nursery or aa playgroup if hes ill, even a cold because im thinking of the other children that could become ill by him.

You should have told them to sod off Sarah, he has asthma like my stephen does and people make cmments about him coughing alot. Im going to print a t shirt saying hes asthmatic!

 

[trixipaws]

it depends on the illness. i agree with beanie, if it summit like chicken pox then no way should they take their child out of the house and around other children- but colds and suchlike- well, we all have to build up our immunity somehow! they will hav to be exposed to them sooner or later, whether its at school, or college, or nightclubs, or work!
havin said that, before millie was 3 months old, i didnt want her near others with a cold, coz she just seemed too tiny to deal with even a sniffle!

 

[lauramumof2]

I dont think I would say anything to the mum, im a shitbag like that,
I think tho lou you should say to the playgroup organiser about your concerns.

I feel for the mum too though as there was a period last year where all two of them had something wrong all the time. Joe had the cold which turned into purpura, then he had the cold again then the two of them had chicken pox, it was neverending and very lonely as I couldnt go anywhere.

 

[Princess_Puddles]

The more you keep your child away from other kids even if they have a petty cold then you're not helping their immune system because by catching things like colds it helps their immune system build up and fight it better where as if you keep them away at the first sight of another child having one then when your child does catch it they could come down worse because their immune system isn't built up enough to fight it as well. I know its not nice for them and obviously Im not suggesting you purposely make your child catch something but when they go to full time school they will catch alot of things and you can't take your child out of school because another pupil has a bad cough/snotty nose/cold. And I do put my Sons health first too, I hate it when he's ill and yes when he is really ill I dont send him to nursery (He only goes 2 afternoons a week anyway) but I'd prefer him to catch things to build up his immunity than him not to and end up worse off when he does catch something.

Everyone has their own ways of doing things so if you think that it would be best to approach the childs parent/s then thats what you should do, but maybe have a word with the playgroup worker first and see what s/he says

 

[weenik]

I would speak to the organiser if you're concerned about it. The nursery Dylan will be going to has a policy and all parents & staff are aware of it and the staff enforce it. It's not mega strict or anything, it's just if it's something like measles/fever/sickness you keep them off which I think is just common sense. The staff check on the kids return (with their parents of course) that they have been treated for it. Even recently there was head lice and as long as they had started treatment they were ok to return, even with it still there. I'm happy with that because I know that they're going to get colds & such and things are going to get passed about.

 

[Sarah&Braydon]

You should have told them to sod off Sarah, he has asthma like my stephen does and people make cmments about him coughing alot. Im going to print a t shirt saying hes asthmatic!

ohhh could we have one off them to lol

 

[Urchin]

To me it totally depends on how sick they are.
A bit of a cough/cold is OK but green snot, high temp and coughing all over the toys every week I wouldn't be happy with.

Fair enough some people don't mind it but if my child was ill for that long I would keep them at home so they had a chance to get better instead of bringing them out all the time which obviously isn't helping matters.

 

[jennywren]

The more you keep your child away from other kids even if they have a petty cold then you're not helping their immune system because by catching things like colds it helps their immune system build up and fight it better where as if you keep them away at the first sight of another child having one then when your child does catch it they could come down worse because their immune system isn't built up enough to fight it as well. I know its not nice for them and obviously Im not suggesting you purposely make your child catch something but when they go to full time school they will catch alot of things and you can't take your child out of school because another pupil has a bad cough/snotty nose/cold. And I do put my Sons health first too, I hate it when he's ill and yes when he is really ill I dont send him to nursery (He only goes 2 afternoons a week anyway) but I'd prefer him to catch things to build up his immunity than him not to and end up worse off when he does catch something.

Everyone has their own ways of doing things so if you think that it would be best to approach the childs parent/s then thats what you should do, but maybe have a word with the playgroup worker first and see what s/he says

Ditto.

Oran has quite a few little cousins all around the same age if I were to keep him away from them all when they all had a cold, he wouldnt have seen anyone the past 4 months!! Like you say they are building up the immune system

 

[maybebaby]

Don't all shoot me at once...

I took Austin to our parent & toddler session this week with chicken pox. He is generally well in himself & he loves going. I kept him away from the baby area & close to me the whole time, and if a child came over I made sure the parent was aware before they got close. No-one said they had a problem with him being there, the organisers said it was fine & I actually had a couple of parents encouraging their toddlers to play with Austin because they hadn't had chicken pox.

With something like chicken pox he's contagious 4 or 5 days before the spots come out, and last week we went to music and swimming before he got spotty so there's a higher chance he infected someone there than this week.

I wouldn't keep Austin away from a group just because there were some ill children there. At the most I would encourage him to play away from them.

You can't protect your child from every illness circulating - what's going to happen when they start school? Coughs and colds are just something you have to get used to & I don't think it's appropriate to ask a mother to keep her children away just because they're coughing.

 

[LucyBee]

Just goes to show that we're all different!
Personally I'd be livid if someone turned up to the playgroup with chickenpox! A cold is one thing but chickenpox! I don't want someone else making the decision that it's ok for my child to catch that kind of illness. I'm amazed your playgroup said it was ok.

 

[Lou]

I have to say if a child turned up to playgroup with chicken pox I'd leave. I don't take Isaac to playgroup if he has even a little cold because I like to keep him at home in the warm and like I said before I do know they need some germs to build up their immune system but I just think its selfish to still go to playgroup when either of us have a cold. The kids I am talking about have been coughing and snotty for weeks now and she still brings them along as though its normal for them to be ill. The thing is I am careful to make sure Isaac is healthy by giving him a balanced diet and keeping him active so why should he go to playgroup and play with unhealthy kids who could make him ill. As it turns out Isaac seem's to have a good resistance to colds but still I don't want to deliberately put him in the firing line so to speak.

I'm going to speak to the mum next week. We get on quite well so it shouldn't kick off. Like I say I hate speaking about people behind their back.