Message to my PF Friends

[Tara1985]

Hi Ladies,

I just wanted to let you know why I’ve been quiet over the past week or so, I’ve not forgotten you lovely girlies!!!

Sorry for creating a thread all about ME but it was the easiest way to message all the ladies I usually reply to and reply to me, I’ve felt bad because I haven’t been able to keep up and send you support. I am so grateful for the support I have had and hope it will continue but I won’t be on here as much as I initially was because the OH spoke to me at the weekend and said he felt like I was getting too stressed which was having an impact on us.

I don’t know what it is and why I started acting irrational but I know he’s right, even when he was saying it I got really humpy with him, I just got my hopes up so much last month.

I found this site for some advice because I thought I was pregnant last month and learnt all about the 2ww and BD and OV (and everything else that involves conceiving a bundle of joy) and during that period I realised how happy I would be to become a mother. At that time me and the OH weren’t actively trying, we just weren’t preventing after I come and the pill and still not. OH knew about the ‘scare’ as we done the test together and we had the ‘talk’ and come to the conclusion it would be something we really wanted from the relationship. So after he said he would be happy to become a father I ran with it and became a bit nymp like . My OH is very laid back and I got wrapped up in the whole ‘TTC’ process and I think it’s freaked him out. He knows I want to become a mother and he says all the right things to me and says he wants the same but I think I’ve just applied too much pressure and it’s scared him a bit. I was so upset after getting AF after 8 days of no show I don’t think he liked seeing me so disappointed.

On the positive side I’m thinking (hoping) he has something up his sleeve that will make me want to put TTC on hold, like a BFR (Big Fat Ring)!!! We’ve talked about marriage and I joked over the weekend (after the serious talk) that we should just do it - it was our 2 year anniversary, but he said he wanted to propose to me properly so will have to watch this space.

I know he is right so I just going to take a back seat for the time being and start having fun with my OH again, will try and pop in once or twice a week to say hello so please don’t think I’ve stopped caring (bit weird because I don’t really know you but I hope you understand what I mean). I really hope you all get your BFP soon, I know how much you’ve all worked at it!!

Tara xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[kanga86]

Hey Hun, sorry that ur oh feels that way about it. Give it a few months and I'm sure he will change his mind. When I had my coil out in January my oh was so scared to ttc straight away that we used condoms for all of feb and most of march. We got our bfp in may after ntnp on both parts and that's when I found this forum. Since my mc my oh is all for ttc properly and isn't as scared of me telling him when I ov etc.

I feel as though men didn't a while to get used to the idea more than us ladies. I did start wondering where u had got to Hun so I'm glad to hear u are ok. Fx u get ur BFR soon xxx

 

[itisbabytime]

hi, I hope you get your BFR! My hubby freaked out at the begging of ttc too - its just such a change from being told from such a young age "contraception, contraception, contraception"!!!!!

He will come around and hopefully you will have a wee bubba soon enough!

 

[Lander]

We’ve talked about marriage and I joked over the weekend (after the serious talk) that we should just do it - it was our 2 year anniversary, but he said he wanted to propose to me properly so will have to watch this space.

Better than my OH's 'Can't afford it'.... It was our 2yr Anniversary on Friday

Look after yourself what ever your plans

Lxx

 

[Water_Melon]

My OH was incredibly freaked out by the idea for a long time but then suddenly he just warmed to it. So now we're trying to conceive. Its a male thing ;p
He will come round in his own time

 

[blondy13]

Hey Tara, just wanted to share that my DH was exactly the same when I first stopped the pill, he insisted we were ntnp, where as I joined here after a month and learnt everything there is to know!! I don't think he was too impressed at first but I don't know he just seemed to accept it slower than me and now I have pcos he's an expert on these things too!! Glad you're still going to be around, and fx for a speedy bfp xxx

 

[louielly]

Hi Tara, My OH is exactly the same! We have actually had a few arguments over it, as he says I put too much pressure on him with the whole 'I'm ovulating so sexy time please' He wants it to be a happy accident....

This is actually going to be my last month of ttc and, as I did get a BFR to take my mind off it. We had agreed children before marriage (his preferment) but he surprised me. So I'm keeping my fingers & toes crossed that you get your BFR very soon too!! x

 

[Tara1985]

Awww thanks girls, it's nice that you shared your own experiences is well. I just thought it was me, don't get me wrong I will still be checking my cycle etc - just not include my OH in everything regarding that part. I think he momentarily thought 'you only want me for my swimmers' bless him.

Anyway it was so nice of you to reply. Will try and keep up with some threads and put my two pence worth him but will be avoiding symtom spotting as I got a bit upset last time. I've also promised myself not to test until I'm late so I'll be getting my POAS fix from you beauties. All the best and hopefully catch you online soon. xxxxxx

 

[BevG]

men never perform well when under pressure lol. i got my OH to agree i could stop the contraceptive i was on and then we just ntnp while it wore off. took 4 months and no stress really at all. im so lucky it was that easy and im really thankful for that.

 

[Tara1985]

Thanks Bev, I don't think they like anything that isn't there idea hahaha. Do you know what you're having?

 

[BevG]

no idea yet, i shall find out on monday if its possible at my anomaly scan. i think stress is counterproductive to ttc really so i found it much easier to not think about it. if a year had gone by and nothing had happened i might have looked into medical reasons but i dont think i could handle actually tracking ov lol. its quite often when ppl have given up trying or stopped worrying that it happens

 

[Tara1985]

Tis very true but for some it's just not as easy as that because they have been wanting for some long. Good luck for your scan xxx

 

[LuW]

We've like .... 3 tries before we're saying no more and waiting until after the wedding! so Nov, April and May I think are my chances (if the army play ball anyways)


And wait a minute.... Kanga .... I think I've missed something here..... CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!


Keep us all informed Bev, I WANNA KNOW NOOWWWWW .... sorry I'm at the stage we're I get overly excited over other peoples babies! haha! xxxx

 

[kanga86]

And wait a minute.... Kanga .... I think I've missed something here..... CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank u hun xx

 

[BevG]

lol i'll tell dont worry, i wanted kids since i was 18 so i do honestly know what its like to want one so bad it makes you cry and hate anyone else that gets it so easily. i just couldnt bring myself to even try if i didnt have a good dad for my kids.
i truly hope everyone here gets their babies soon xxxx

 

[LuW]

oodesperate for an R&R baba!! Just know my cycles are sh*tty so we don't have much chance, BUT it only takes one 'little solider' (ys everything in our relationship has bloody military references) at the end of the day!

 

[Tara1985]

Good luck LuW and looking forward to hearing what you're having Bev.


Me? Nothing new except me and OH are back to 'normal' now but at this rate I'm not banking on conceiving as he has recently started the 'withdrawal' method so he is definitely not ready and it's just my wishful thinking he has a proposal planned. Feel silly even being here but really enjoy talking to the ladies I've met on here. Won't go on about how alone I feel but I'm really gutted and upset with OH for not talking to me. I feel like I can't talk to him now because it will be adding pressure. It's weird because he hasn't changed towards me, still gives me hugs and kisses, doesn't avoid sex and we're getting on fine. Just not my time girls.

xxx

 

[LuW]

-SQUEEZES- Everyones time comes around and when it does everything will be amazing hun XXXX