"Maternity" leave as a surrogate

[MrsG81]

So I am a bit torn as to how much maternity leave to take. I'm only like 6 weeks pregnant so have PLENTY of time to think about it, but it's something that has been on my mind.

I'm a surrogate for my sister and brother in law so I don't need time off to look after a new baby. However, I have had two c-sections so I will need another so will obviously need time to recover from that.

My company only offer standard maternity pay so I am entitled to 6 weeks at 90% of my pay and the SMP for however many weeks. I can't afford to drop down on to maternity pay so need to start working again once the 6 weeks is up.

I know that I will be able to work from home for a little while too as my job is mostly done on my laptop.

I was thinking of taking 2 weeks (out of the 6 weeks at 90% pay) before the baby arrives as experience has shown me that I get tired out towards the end, swollen ankles etc. I had to finish a little earlier than planned with both my boys. Then using the remaining 4 weeks at 90% pay to actually recover from the c-section at home. And then officially starting back working, but doing it from home for 2 weeks. That would take me up to the 6 week check up that I would need to get from the doctor before I am covered by my insurance to drive again (I live 20 miles away from the office).

Do you think it would be cheeky to take the full 6 weeks at 90% pay? Part of me thinks yes but I know it's going to probably be quite emotional and I think spending time at home with my husband and my two boys will help with any emotional ups and downs I might feel.

How long would you take if you were in the same situation?

 

[queenriccy]

No you are entitled to it. What your doing is an amazing fantastic thing - pregnancy is bloody hard work and every woman who has done it knows that. You need time after to rest, especially if you are having a C-section. They cannot make you go back straight away, that's just stupid. Even though you are carrying your niece/nephew you are still entitled to the same rights as everybody else.

I would take exactly what you have said above and I don't think its unreasonable at all

xx

 

[mellie_88]

No why would it be cheeky of you? You're body is going through a massive thing, with a great deal to recover from. The fact you're doing it for someone else makes you even more entitled to it!

You're work shouldn't be funny about it, they can't be legally anyway!

 

[Cakey]

No you should definitely take as much time as you need! As queenriccy said, what you're doing is wonderful and you are still carrying a baby which is bloody hard work, you should be entitled to the rest afterwards, especially if you're having a c section xx

 

[SpinSugar]

It's not cheeky at all! Your plan sounds well thought out.
What you are doing is so wonderful. What a kind soul you are x

 

[Beckyb1991]

Take what your entitles to hun. I think what your doing is incredible , your sister is very lucky to have you. What an amazing lady you are xxx

 

[Mrs M]

What about annual leave?

I've got some questions - can I private message you?

 

[MrsG81]

Thanks everyone, you have really reassured me x

Mrs m I guess that is why I feel a little cheeky as I could take some holiday leave instead but figured as I am entitled to 6 weeks at almost full pay I wanted to take it and spend time with my family. But I guess if it had been any other kind of abdominal surgery that required 6 weeks recovery I probably would be happy to take the full 6 weeks. Oh and sure feel free to message me x

 

[x_larlybelle_x]

I'd take it all. Ur doing an amazing thing for ur sister but ur body will still need time to recover after the section.

 

[SpinSugar]

Given the circumstances would you be covered under your works sick policy rather then maternity? And be entitled to full pay?

 

[Jostu]

I think there will be policies in place to cover surrogacy as well as having your own baby to look after.
A c section is major abdominal surgery and you will need the recovery time. Use it! Xx

 

[mummyofdragons]

I know at my work the maternity policy is regardless of the outcome of your pregnancy, if you get to 29 weeks, you're still entitled to the years maternity leave and 39 weeks maternity pay.

Take whatever time you feel you need. I know after I had my son, I physically didn't feel myself until a while afterwards, and there is no way I could've gone back to work after a month. I wasn't even driving until about 5-6 weeks afterwards! Even without a baby to look after, you still need time to recover. As you said yourself, it's going to be a pretty emotional time for you and you're probably also going to need some time to deal with that.

 

[Jolly81]

No, you're absolutely not cheeky at all!!! Regardless of whether you're a surrogate or not you're still having a baby and need time to recover xxx