'juts relax and it will happen' .... arrghhhhhhhhhh

[Gizzy Kelly]

Ladies

s it me or am I the only one who wants to punch someone when they say that??
I was at dinner with friends the other night. One of the girls who i dont really know that well as she was a friend of a friend (who has 3 children of her own and conceived very easily) was banging on on about how you cannot POAS (ovulation) and plan babies like that and it has to happen naturally when we are both 'relaxed'. She kept saying you will never get pregnant unless you relax!!!!!!!!

It sooo does not work like that and I get so annoyed when people who take that 'relaxed it will happen' approach.

I came off the pill in September 2009 and I was totally 100% relaxed about it for ages. It was not until well over a year later that we realsied that sopmething may be wrong.

I find it as the time goes on I get more annoyed with that comment... am i juts sensative???

Gizzy xxxxx

 

[laurat]

Im with you on this I hate this phrase! Yes it may be the phrase if u have been trying for like 6 months but 2 and a half years down the line and 1 mc later I also want to slap someone everytime I hear this! So frustrating!!!!

 

[Eutha]

Yep sounds about right... I have also heard that subconusly you don't want one!and just relax......people can be sooo dumb I have been ttc for 10 years now and I have heard it all and luckly I have not hit anyone yet.....I like to look at it like practing my patients for when my little ones comes.....

 

[Chazabell]

I wanna punch anyone who says that, or tries to pass comment like they know how it feels, when they didnt even try for 6 months or it was an accident!

I'm having a low moment, i could punch anyone. Just found out one of my friends is 12 weeks pregnant. I am happy for them don't get me wrong, just so unbelievably jealous and envious of her working bits pffft! Lol xxxx

 

[Vickyxx]

I can just about tolerate someone saying that to me when they dont know of my situation, but it really gets my back up when people who know we have fertility issues say it

of course how silly of me, I thought I would go through all this heartache, countles blood tests, cameras in areas they shouldnt be, an operation when all along I should just relax .... ahhhhhhhh frickin dumb arse!!

 

[Chazabell]

Ha ha Vicky that made me chuckle! xx

 

[Vickyxx]

Its just bleeding common sense tho Chaz, when people have been trying as long as us it clearly means there is a bigger problem then simply relaxing!!

Hope your feeling better hun, I just swore at the TV because it announced yet another pregnant celebrity, god I am turning into a bitter old cow!

 

[blondy13]

I agree Vicky, sometimes if people don't know the situation you can't blame them for saying things like that, but when people do, grrrrr!! And also every time I go to a hospital appointment I get all the reception staff at work winking at me saying 'have you got an announcement to make then?!' I feel like saying, no it's the absolute opposite of what you think!!! Hope you're feeling a bit better now Chaz xxx

 

[Vickyxx]

I think this is one of the reasons why I choose to share my fertility journey with my family and friends, to avoid all the questions, and I do find it helps as I have lots of support and dont have to worry about people finding out etc .... this is hard enough as it is!!

 

[Kay Kay]

This is so weird gizzy cos a friend of mine said the exact same thing to me last week! She knows my situation and unfortunately she recently had to have a forced termination. She is so grief stricken and heartbroken and I'm so so sad for her. We had a heart to heart and I told her if she ever needed to talk or cry I was there. Then at the end of the conversation she said and if you just relax it will happen for you! Maybe if you just focus on something else it'll probably happen! I swear if she wasn't my friend I would have smacked her on the jaw!

Thing is I know she isn't trying to piss me off, she just doesn't understand my situation. Her pregnancy wasn't planned and she's back on the pill now. She has no idea what its like ttc. And I have no idea what its like to bury my baby. *and breathe*

Gizzy, on a seperate note, that's another thing we have in common, I came off the pill Sep 2009 aswell. You didn't start ttc Feb 2010 did you? Lol

It's good to vent with ladies who get it xxxxxxxx

 

[Chazabell]

Jeeeeez just relax you lot, it will happen!

Ha ha ha ha

Couldnt resist xxx

 

[Vickyxx]

Jeeeeez just relax you lot, it will happen!

Ha ha ha ha

Couldnt resist xxx

Ha ha ha ha love it

 

[julianne]

Gizzy, I hear ya loud and clear! I am not a violent person but.......

 

[charliebear]

Did you forget about the comment 'just forget about it and it'll happen!' Grrr, how can you forget about it?

I'm with you girls, I'm not violent but geez when some one says any of these they should expect a slap!

 

[Gizzy Kelly]

Thanks Ladies, I am glad it is not just me!!!!!!

Kay Kay re starting trying in Sept 2009 as well a someone told me that I am most fertile the first month I come off the pill.... Clearly not! LOL.

Vicky I love the gun icon... really made me chuckle.

Gizzy xxxx

 

[sarah1]

this thread is a good one, you forgot 'don't worry, it'll all work out for you, it did for my friend and she had something like you have....' That's right, all the doctors who tell us it might not work are clearly just having a bit of a laugh, and everyone is exactly the same! xxxx

 

[Tinkerbell3]

I can't stand people that say this.
Thankfully know one has said it to me as we decided not to tell people we were trying and then just tell them I'm pregnant once the forst 3 months have passed. I caved in and told my mum though but she knows it's now been a year of trying and still not happened but she wouldn't dare say that to me.

 

[Esperanza84]

No, you're not being sensative gizzy! Only you know how you feel about it and it doesn't help what they say! People can be so sensitive on this issue. I don't think they know how hard it is!

xx

 

[ETee]

I agree.. horrible, horrible, horrible...

 

[LouiseB]

Actually... i used to hate people saying things like that but to be honest it's kind of become my only hope.

I just have to hope that they are right and one day it will just happen when it's my turn and that all this IVF crap is just killing time until then

My brother said something similar the other day and i didn't think "omg if only you knew what we're up against!!!" i thought "Shit. I hope you're right" lol