Just so fed up of the same old.

[prettypenguin]

Feel like my oh is a brick wall with a penis on top.

In our household i look after Charlie 90% of the time, the only.times i don't is when i work 16 hours in the evenings and an hour doing my driving lessons. When i work my mum and auntie take in turns to give Charlie his tea and bath/settle him for the night til oh gets home from work. I've only recently started so although Charlie is supposed to be asleep when he gets back at the min he's a little unsettled with the change.


So today i worked 8-4 not a usual shift just doing some extra training which was compulsory. Got home, and was happy to see Charlie and oh, got in and the house was a state. It literally looked like he hadn't lifted a finger all day. Charlie's nappy was dirty he said he forgot to change it.but wasn't sure if he was joking but his bum looked a worse red than this morning. But to be fair its an easy mistake to make when you're not used to looking after him.

Anyway so i basically gave Charlie his tea, played with him read to him bathed him put him to bed and also ended up cleaning all the dishes he'd used today,the bath as he'd left hairs everywhere, the whole kitchen, living room, floors etc. So i was in a bit of a mood and argued with oh that I've been at work all day and i would have at least expected the dishes to be done as he'd used them(he did this on other training days in the past too) so he went on about how Charlie's hardly slept, when he did he had stuff to do on his work laptop for tomorrow and he refuses to put the tv on for him even just for a quick 5 mins whilst he does a bit if cleaning.

Then he went off out in a huff for half an hour.

Now, tell me if i sound like a massive diva but i honestly don't expect the whole house to be sparkling i know how messy it can get but seriously he didn't even do the dishes or even less just wash Charlies bottles. So when he got back i carried on.cleaning and doing loads of washing thinking he needed to do more work, and apart from making the tea he just sat on his arse watching tv and playing on ebay and YouTube. What a joke. After my cleaning i crammed for my theory test which.is this week; i can only use ohs work laptop on this disc which he takes to work in the day and im at work in the evening. Every night this week so im stressing on that.

I then resigned to doing the stupid dishes and didn't put the pans away properly and they all fell out on the floor crashing and waking Charlie. So i just said for fucks sake and half slammed a plastic cup on the side.before seeing to Charlie.

When i got back down oh was like 'should i get you an anger management cd cause i don't want you passing on these moods tp Charlie and stressing the.baby out (for those on tapatalk im 4/5 months pg)

I was like !!!!!!!!!! Fucking anger management??? No its YOU you twat dicking about all night whilst i fucking skivvy round after being at work all day and telling you what was wrong.before!!!!

Im so angry i didn't even say anything i just ignored him and I've gone to bedband he's sulking cause im being off with him.

I wouldn't even mind if i hadn't had the argument with.him before, and also the other day too. He just doesn't listen and he knows damn well what's bleeding wrong. How i am going to do this with 2 kiddies as much as i tell him it just doesn't get through im sick of saying pick up and clean up after yourself, is that really too much to ask? The other.night whilst i was at work he did do a lot of cleaning but I've said all i want is for you to clean up after yourself, wash plates and put your crap away etc.



Grrrrrrrrrr

Sorry for the long and in depth post i just need to get it out, feel special stressed i can't handle arguing with him when it gets me nowhere.

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[Princess81]

Oh I can sympathise my o/h does very little too and when he does do something he seems to think it deserves praise
I'd like to know how they'd cope if we fell off the face of the earth eh?
I don't even know what to suggest you do Hun xx

 

[prettypenguin]

Oh god that annoys me when he comes up reeling off little jobs he's.done like he wants a pat on the head. Now he's trying to turn it round on me when:/ x

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[VikkiR]

I'm sorry but I'd be telling him to shape up or ship out. If the OH doesn't add value to your life what's the point. He should've been making you dinner and if he's had the time to make the mess then he should have the time to blinking clean it up!

 

[prettypenguin]

Gah we had a talk last night and he was going on about how he does try which i know he does but he never listens properly.

We then got off topic on about.big jobs that needs doing and in the end i just said how if he uses dishes he should wash them, he then went on about how he had to do them when he was younger and his mum and dad were really strict and his dad.sometimes used to smack him etc, so that's why he doesn't like doing them....so i said how i had to.do them every night when i was younger regardless of if id been home that evening and my mum used to smack me all the time but at the end of the day jobs still need doing. I then said Italy funny how he could wash up at uni and do bits of housework but not now he lives with me and not 4 other scruff bags.

Pah excuses excuses eh x

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[LoopyLouize]

I know you get really wound up with R and it's totally understandable, I'd feel exactly the same!

If i was in your situation I would stop doing his washing, just do yours, do your own ironing and leave his, literally do only your own stuff and clean up your own stuff but leave everything of his.

My ex was the same, in the end I would cook tea, wash my plate and serve my food into it and then get a dirty dish out the sink that he'd said he would wash 4 days earlier but yet it was still in the sunk along with the majority of the kitchen too, so I served his food on a dirty plate with old tomato sauce and Christ knows what stuck to the plate. He looked at me funny and asked why was the plate not clean... My reply "well apparently you are happy living in a shit hole so you can eat of a plate that you was supposed to clean!"
He got the point after that.

Lol O is the same now but I think he had got that sick of my nagging he has started to do little jobs here and there so even though he doesn't do much it's a damn sight more than what my ex did so I can't complain much really.

I think with your R, he doesn't help himself with his sarcastic comments , such as 'anger management etc' , it only ends up upsetting the situation even more.

Not sure what to suggest really other than just make him do his own stuff x

 

[VikkiR]

There seems to be a lot of posts lately about men and their selfishness/unthoughtfulness I honestly can't understand it. I'm wondering if it's a generational thing and whether young lads in their early 20s are so different now as they were 20 years ago when I was a slip of a girl. One thing I do know for sure is that we teach people how to treat us, if they can get away with doing jack they will. I wish I could put my old head on your lovely ladies shoulders, better still send the buggers to me for a month it makes me really sad you ladies are being treated like dirt, and that you feel you have to put up with it. We have enough to deal with as new mums without the OH turning into the 'child' from hell xx
Ps I agree with loopylouise, just look after yourself and LO even if it means buying paper plates