Just had words about bfing

[pinkyprincess]

With my OH!

I mentioned that I'd considered trying Tyler on formula (in a cup) and I'd decided against it (for various reasons including that I worry he'll prefer it and refuse the breast and I want to carry on feeding)
OH said to this that he 'wants him on formula so we can go out'
To which I responded that I made a commitment to have a child and it's not the formula stopping us it's the fact he won't drink it out of anything
He said that id done 6 months and that was 'enough' (!)I pointed out that WHO recommends is 2 years and I may carry on bfing past a year
He then went on a rant saying how he hates that we can't go out or I can't have more than 1 glass of wine and he can't remember the last time the 2 of us did something together.
I told him were raising a child we have out whole life ahead of us to go out drinking and this is what we are doing at the moment.

I understand his point but I'm pissed off at his bfing comments!!!

 

[LoopyLouize]

Awww Hun

You are doing so well and I don't see why you should stop if your committed and comfortable.

On the other hand, I can understand your OH's point of view, that being said, your perfectly right with your reply! You have your whole life ahead of you! X

 

[winnie89]

Oh hun I get it all the time harry was crying and rooting this morning while we were in the doctors surgery so I started to feed him he had a whinge about how everyone was looking at me because I had my boob out, but no one can tell me to stop, if u wanna bf till tylers one then do it chick it's ur body ur carried him and gave birth to him and u feed him so why shouldn't u choose when to stop. I have to start weaning harry onto a bottle because I can't pump at work and it's not practical hope ur OH comes round soon x

 

[winnie89]

Oh and tell him it's a load of bullshit if u can't go out and bf I do it all the time, popping baby on boobs seems hell of a lot easier than pissing about warming a bottle!

 

[jojo_2012]

Seriously he'll look back on this time and realise it's gone by in a flash. Is he the youngest child in his family by any chance?

 

[vickib_1984]

Believe me having a baby that won't take cold milk is a nightmare!!! I wanted to feed James but he had no interest at all he won't have milk room temp so I take a flask if hot water with me and warn it that way bfing would of been so much easier for me


xxx

 

[mum2b410]

Like others have said hun u do what u r happy and comfortable with! Your OH can't argue that it won't benefit Tyler! I can c what he's saying but it seems a little selfish? Maybe he could have put it better or u guys could have discussed it and made a joint decision rather than him just saying coz uve done 6 months Tyler has had enough!! My OH commented the other day that he thought I should stop soon (I only do a couple of bf's a day now) but he knows I will stop when I'm ready and doesn't push me on it! Hope ur OH can b a bit more understanding of ur pov! Xx

 

[Lulabell]

Could you not express and put it in a cup?

Personally think your oh is being selfish. You are trying to do what's best for your child. And think of all the money you are saving! It's one thing I've noticed since having to switch to formula...it's so expensive!

 

[Sassysugar]

It would be nice to have a night out but like you say, you have the rest of your lives to go out and it's going in so quickly at the mo. Stick to your guns hun, I want to try and bf until around the year mark. It's also so much easier (IMO) to bf than having to make formula.

 

[TORino]

Oh lordy. It's a shame your oh isn't more supportive. It's rather selfish of him to ask you to stop bf so you can go out together.

I hope he comes to his senses

 

[pinkyprincess]

I'm glad you've all said that! I thought he was being incredibly selfish but Tyler is my life and I'd do anything for him so I would think that lol! Sometimes I think he thinks it's 'my fault' he won't take a bottle! I did point out bfing a 1 y/o if different to a 6 month old. I do wonder of its that bfing after 6 months stigma maybe?

 

[Sassysugar]

Everyone out here is supportive of me bf but I am starting to get some people asking how long I'm going to bf for, or am I not stopping yet now that he's on solids. I do wonder though is it because he's quite big and maybe he looks like he should just be in solids?

I was chatting to a few of the girls about him not sleeping through and they were saying that he will sleep through once I stop bf and that he wakes for comfort etc, that he shouldn't need to wake for feeds now etc. I'm starting to feel like its acceptable to bf to 6 months but after that I've defo had more comments from friends etc (never had a stranger say something to me while in public)

Im going to keep going though until at least september....

 

[knopk@]

Hun Antonis mixed fed from 7 weeks and I couldnt leave him until he was 7-8 months or so. So formula wont solve the problem necessarily.

We have been out together just couple of times, we dont have anyone helping but we knew that before we were having him.

Tell OH formula is not a solution to all problems and only stop BFing when you and him are ready.
My NCT friends introduced bottles around 6 months and many babies start preferring the bottle.

 

[Susanne]

I sympathise with you. Sometimes men (and women) don't really appreciate what a massive commitment they let themselves in for when they decide to have a baby, and then get a massive shock when they realise life doesn't just go back to the way it was before once the baby is a few months old. It's all a balance game of finding compromises where possible and sticking to your guns where you have to fight for your baby's best interests. I have my fingers crossed for you that you manage to make your OH see your point of view without having a falling out about it!

 

[littlemiss83]

Oh hun - your OH is being quite selfish. It maybe wouldn't be too bad if he had genuine reasons for wanting you to give up, but it seems his reasons are based on himself.

When I was BF'ing my wee girl they said its best to do it until 6 months old, rather than 1yr or whatever it is now. But it was the same with formula, you stopped formula at 6 months too.

I'm still giving Kayden formula even tho I think its a bit silly because he gets 3 biggg meals & I feel like he should be on water/fruit juice.

I think in general this is a bit of a stigma about doing it after 6 m/o (which is silly) because they start solids, start sleeping better, drink out beakers, alot of mums go back to work at 6 m/o & stop BF'ing. Various things like that make it a stigma I suppose. But forget all that, he's your baby, you do as you please.

I suppose in a tiny way I can understand your OH wanting some sort of normality, it is a shame that you cant go out for his b.day. Esp if its only one night. Effectively you should be able to leave your LO for a few hours, BF'ing or not. So there must be some issues need addressing but i def wouldn't say the answer is to stop BF'ing iykwim.

xxxxxxxx

 

[BabyBrain]

I got it the other way round last weekend, we went out for lunch and were trying to warm Albert's bottle in a half full cupaccino cup, apparently thats all the useless, spotty little oik of a waiter could find, and OH said he wished I'd have bf cos it would be easier when we are out! It wasn't for the want of trying love! Made me feel a bit shit but nevermind

Fancy swapping for the day lol? xxxxxxx

 

[pinkyprincess]

Awww BB! Tell him to use his own breasts!!

The thing is things ARE getting better the last 2 nights he's been asleep by 7 for 2 1/2 hours had a feed and either gone 4 1/2 hours or another 2 then 4 1/2!!!! Really trying to not get my hopes up but hear it takes 3 days to create a habit so if he does it again I'll feel more confident! If this sticks (or even gets better) 2 1/2 hours is plenty of time to go for a meal isn't it?

 

[BabyBrain]

Yeah I would say it's plenty of time!

 

[GregorysGirl]

I agree with louise. bless u PP - ur doing fab xx