Joining you - so much to take in

[miss_kseniya]

Ok, so I think it's safe to say the the FR test I did yesterday (and the 2 others afterwards ) show that I am pregnant.

As awful as this is going to sound, it was totally unplanned and was from a split condom with a guy I have been having a fling with recently. I had no idea that I was at that stage in my cycle to be honest so this has come as a massive shock to me. Anyway, there is no doubt in my mind what the dad will say, so I am having to face up to the fact i'm going to be a single parent.

I have got so much to take in at the moment and my blinking hormones are all over the place which isn't helping. Once minute I am crazily happy and excited that i'm growing this baby inside me and the next I am bawling my eyes out as what is facing me as a single parent!

Is anyone else out there having to go through their pregnancy alone or is it only me. I feel awful as this is never the way I thought it would happen and always assumed I would be married or at least settled before planning children.

Sorry to sound if I am moaning. I'm aware that lots of people are desperately TTC and unable to (my brother and his wife included) which is going to make it even worse when I eventually tell them that I fell pregnant after an accident with my fling.

Sorry ladies, self indulgent whinge post, I feel so confused at the moment and a bit of a failure really as I have allowed myself to be in this situation. I am happy about being pregnant as its wonderful, but so scary at the same time.

 

[nmf1987]

im not in the same position hun but just wanted to say congrates and good luck. you might be suprised when telling the dad sometimes men shock us in a good way.

to me it doesn't matter how the baby is conceived aslong as it is loved and cared for the way all babies should be and it sounds like whatever the next 9 months hold when the baby is here you will be the person to make sure that happens.

here's to a happy and healthy 9 months.

nadia xxx

 

[xshauna_bazx]

Lots of people have to do it alone...but enjoy it its an amazing experience! People cope and you will too. xxx

 

[star fish]

I am really impressed by your attitude. Thinking of how much it could upset your brother and his wife. Clearly you are mature and thoughtful and so will be a fabulous mother. You should definitely tell the dad, he may want to be a lot more involved than you thought. I know a few people who have done it alone. But you know what, they don't stay alone. They still met someone in time and got married and it doesnt matter that it was in the wrong order. We're all here if you want to come and be as hormonal as you like, you wont be the only one! XXXX

 

[amandapanda]

Awww congratulations! Sorry it was not your ideal way of conceiving but baby is here now and you have 9 months to plan and prepare! I agree you need to tell the father - maybe he won't step up, maybe he will, but tell him anyway. There are def people on here who are single - there is also a single parent forum on here which you can post on, but you'll get support from everyone here wherever you post. Good luck hun, you've got a lot to take in like you say and hormones won't be helping, so just go easy on yourself! xx

 

[miss_kseniya]

Thanks ladies, it's nice to hear everyone being so supportive.

I feel so emotional at the moment it's crazy. I'm not far off turning 30 and had to tell my mum yesterday. I honestly felt like I was 16 and telling her, lol. Although she never said in so many words, I know she thinks I will be mad if I go ahead with this pregancy, although she will be incredibly supportive of my decision.

I will let the dad know later this week and I guess he may surprise me, but if I'm toally honest with myself, I don't think he will.

I can't tell you how amazing it feels to know there is a little bean growing inside me though, even if it is scary. I have been incredibly broody recently as lots of ladies at work have just had babies or left on maternity leave and due any day, and most of my friends are getting married and having babies now as they are all about 30 too.

No sign of any proper symptoms yet though, except an incredibly gurgling belly all the time and a little bit of a sore back. I suppose I should probably make a doctors appointment too. As I've never considered TTC before, I genuinly don't really know what I'm suposed to be doing. Am not planning on telling anyone though until after my 12 week scan.

 

[nadine]

helloooooo hunni,

well were to start i was in the same situation as you with my first little boy, i was 25, i was seeing a guy i was on the rebound and it was just a little fun, then same thing happened.......condom split

i never planned that i would have a baby on my own, spesh at the age of 25, i had never held a baby b4 let alone want one, i was more interested in my career and going out ect, it was the last thing on my mind, however i new i was going to have it as i don't believe in anything else

ill not lie it was hard and with me the baby's dad really didn't want to know so it was hard in the fact of having no one to share things with, in fact i was 4 weeks pregnant when i found out and told him and since that day i have never seen him since and only spoke to him 3 times, and my son is 2, ............ive later found out hes in jail (real good catch)

me and my son are happier then ever now n im so glad i was bless with my little boy even if his daddy is a cold man, i believe im a better person for having him, as hard as it got some time,

now im pregnant again with a real gem who i love to bits, not planned again but never the less happy

if you need to talk about anything im here hun x x x x

 

[mumofmany]

firstly congratualations, this pregnancy was a bit of a shock and even though i am married my little boy is only now 11 months old i had only just stopped breastfeeding him thought i was safe but was drunk and had the condom in my hand the whole time lol and we are in a 3 bedroomed house got a 7 seater car just wasn;t any room for another baby, what about the 5 kids i already have is it fair on them, everything went through my head, so much stress on my husbands head to provide for another mouth and he only 29, but in the end i just knew what i wanted to do and we are so happy to now be this far along and are so looking forward to having another baby and the kids are all made up, and space as my nan used to say theres always room for one more. i know my situation is different but when i was pregnant with my 3rd it could have been a totally different story, i had only been with my husband then for 2 weeks (1st 2 to an ex) and i had to tell him i was pregnant, i made my decision to keep the baby wether he wanted to be involved or not I was already a single parent to 2 children who's father didn;t want to know once we split so what was 1 more. my husband shcked me and was so made up bless him he was only 22 and i was 26 at the time, i would definately say as long as you are happy thats what is important, and as daft as this will sound sometimes i miss being a single parent, my kids used to do everything for me they would run to me for cuddles and if they did something good i was the first one they wanted to tell, now i have to share them m husband adopted them and they see him as their dad and my daughter is a daddy's girl and she was only 4 when we got together and she always goes to him now and still cuddles him she is 12 now, my son who is 14 told me when we get divorced he is living with dad (my husband)so as much as it can be hard work on your own you get all the benefits too.

 

[mumofmany]

just to add no intentions of getting a divorce lol just my son letting me know in advance what he is doing