I need some advice to get the romance back

[Der5050]

I'm looking for some advice too get the romance back in my life.
My gf hade our baby 5 months ago. It was a very easy birth no ripping it only lasted 7 min of hard labour. She keeps on coming up with things too get out of sex. a fight and frustration always comes out when I try to start some thing with her Evan rub her back or kiss her. Our daughter sleeps through the night and takes regular naps. And all the parenting and house work is shared between both of us. I am a very frustrated and it is affecting our relationship. I really don't know what too do I've asked her too go see a doctor but she says she will just wait till the 6 month check up. Ive also suggested counciling she does not think we need it so she won't go.
It would be nice if I could find a solution soon. I am a very carring person and I love her with all my heart. I just don't want this too be a problem any more.

 

[Verity2011]

Didn't want to read and run. Is sex the. Only problem you're having or is there other stuff? If it's just sex I think councilling and seeing doctors is a little pre-emptive. It can take women quite a while before they feel ready to have sex again even if labour was a breeze - 5 months really isn't that long. Is she breastfeeding? Even if you think parenting is completely equal, if you're breastfeeding, it's a huge responsibility and can be very tiring. The worst think to get anyone in the mood and begin relations is pressure. I would advise backing off a little and just having a nice relaxed conversation about how she's feeling in that respect. If that's the only thing then just try and be patient and supportive, having a baby is a big upheaval and it can take quite a while to get back in the swing of things

 

[Froslass]

Whilst I understand your frustration, please try and remember she only had a baby five months ago! Even though it may have been an "easy" birth, some women don't feel the same for a long time after. She may not feel physically attractive or the need for sex. I'm sure she does want to have sex with you, but its really intrusive for women and she probably just doesn't feel ready. Talk about it with her, ask her how she feels and explain your not going to make her feel she has to be intimate, but if there's anything you can do to help her you will.

Sent from my HTC Sensation Z710e using Tapatalk

 

[Der5050]

Sex is not the only thing that is missing. She seams very distant, does not want too talk about what's going on, does not want to be kissed or touched things like that. She is not breast feeding she had too stop she was not making enough. I have also tryed to give her space I am very supportive and I do understand she just pushed out a (watermelon). I have talked with very close friends (both of ours) friends that know both of us very closely. They are just as stumped as I am. It seems like the relationship is very one sided.

 

[Froslass]

It could be post natal depression - if she's very distant and seems down in general maybe you could suggest she speak to her health visitor or GP about how she's feeling.

 

[gslamcx]

hello