How is the whole process exactly ????????????

[Ebony_Mommy]

I watch all them birthing programmes, but I doubt 'real life' is like that.

So my question is:

To all moms

What exactly is the whole process like?

(From you have your first contraction, to you being in labour, to the baby being dressed etc)

E.g (They take the baby out, place her on my tummy, etc)

Also, if you deliver in the early hours (say 1am) when does your partner have to leave?


(It would be nice to here from someone from Reading as well who delivered at RBH)

 

[Nicky_Jones]

Hi Ebony I live in Wokingham and come under RBH, but I had a home birth. However I did the hospital tour etc just in case I ended up having to go to Royal Berks if there was a problem. On Marsh Ward (and Ively etc) there are limited visiting times for your OH IIRC they have to leave by 9pm and can't come back until 9am. This was one of the reasons I was VERY keen on a homebirth. I can relate my experience if you are interested but might not be quite what you are after.

I felt very restless but lathargic on the day I went into labour. I tried to have a snooze on the afternoon (as usual) but couldn't. So I got up and went into Tesco's as I needed some bits (mainly catfood as the cats had decided they didn't like the food I had for them). While driving in I was getting a few stomach cramps but that wasn't unusual. While going round Tesco's they were getting worse and more frequent and I called my husband from the queue at around 4pm to ask him to leave work early. I drove home and asked my neighbour to come round so I wasn't on my own. The contractions were getting worse and more frequent. I timed them and they were 3-4mins apart which didn't seem right by what I had been told at the antenatal classes. They had said when they are 3mins apart they should be lasting 1min long. I called the number anyway at about 4:30 and there was a midwife available for home delivery who they sent round to do an assessment. He didn't go home. He arrived around 5pm and I was 1cm dilated. He recommended a bath and was going to re-examine me in 1hr. I couldn't stay in the bath for more than about 20mins. He re-examined me after only 30mins and I was 5cm dilated. She was born at 8:45. The official labour time was only 2hrs 15mins (don't know what they consider official labour) and the final stage was only 15mins. Unfortunately I had 2 complicated tears so I had to be transferred to Royal Berks for sewing up and neither midwife felt confident. They were very good there and we eventualy left there at 2am. NB the breast feeding clinic at the Royal Berks is fantastic!

 

[Ebony_Mommy]

aaaawwww thnx sweetie...

i know visiting hours are from 3pm to 9pm

and partners from 9am..

but what if you go into labour say at 2am and have your baby at 4am,..

then what time they shove your partner out?

 

[Nicky_Jones]

Sorry forgot to put that bit - while you are in labour your partner can stay with you the whole time - don't know how quickl they transfer you to the ward though. Sorry

 

[budge]

ive answered you in third trimester ebony

 

[Urchin]

When I had mine in the night, OH stayed until maybe 2 hours after I had him, when I went up to the ward. They don't kick them out straight away.

 

[Cat&Noah]

Yeah my OH stayed with me for several hours once Noah was born. It normally depends on how busy they are. If they are really busy and need the room for another woman coming in then you will have to go to the ward normally, but most of the time you should get a couple of hours together at least.

Oh and be prepared for a bit of coming and going, in particular with your first its common to go into hospital and be sent home again if your under 3cm dilated, its only considered established labour once you have gone over the 3cm stage and that can take a long time, it took me over a day of contractions to get from 1cm to 3cm. If you show up and they examine you and find your not established they normally send you home again as its not worth you sitting around for what could be hours still. Although its worth noting that if you do go home again, dont feel silly if you fell you need to go back again in only a couple of hours, I went to hospital after nearly a day f contractions and was told I was only 1 1/2cm dilated I went home in tears cause I could belive how long it was taking and I could sleep from contractions, I was only home for a couple of hours, before sobbing to OH I said I wanted to so back, this time I was 4cm dilated!! so thinks can change dramtically very quickly, so dont feel like you cant go back cause they turned you away only a short while ago.

 

[Icecream]

Your partner has to leave? I am not being left in hospital.

 

[Strangeness]

You partner will have to leave out of visiting hours hun. It's so mum's can get rest without having loads of people's partners and family around.

I had Aaron at 7.30am and was up on the ward at 8.30am. My hubby went out to get my bag from the car and asked if he could come straight back in seen as I had just had Aaron and they said it was fine. When he buzzed to come back in to the ward they wouldn't let him in till 9am even though he explained. Stupid mw's! But he would stay from 9am till 8pm. I was in for 3 days due to a c section.

 

[Icecream]

I AM NOT BEING LEFT

 

[little*red]

Icecream, sorry if im being nosey, but do you have a fear of hospitals? if you do then why don't you consider a home birth?

 

[Icecream]

Besides what do other patients have to do with it? They can't see your room.

 

[Jo]

sorry hun, you don't have much choice after a couple of hours

After i had had Emily and Jack Oh was a loud to stay until i was taken upto the wrd a couple of hours i think, bit hazy lol

 

[Strangeness]

Room? You're usually on a ward with 3 other women. That's why they don't allow people to stay.

 

[Icecream]

I never saw any wards when I visited my sister.

 

[Jo]

Besides what do other patients have to do with it? They can't see your room.

you get moved from delivery room up to a ward after a couple of hours and thats why partners have to go until visiting hours.
You'll be that knackered you won't really notice anyway

 

[Strangeness]

There are wards but you can hire the rooms for about £50 a night in my hospital. I was moved to my own room due to infection but my hubby still wasn't allowed to stay past 8pm. Only the night I was going home because I left at 9pm.

 

[Icecream]

Well, suppose it'd be a homebirth then, or I'd leave anyway. Not sure about leaving my child with strangers though (and idiots- don't seem too intelligent at my hospital).

I'm sorry. I know I sound horrid but I have my reasons - honest. I'm a positive person and if it wasn't tearing me apart I'd get over it.

 

[Nicky_Jones]

TBH that was one of the MANY reasons I wanted a homebirth. I am really glad I got my homebirth OK. Go for it.

 

[Gnomentum]

Icecream - check with your midwife about the policy at your hospital, as they vary. I was VERY anti a hospital birth until I visited my local midwife led maternity ward.. if you get transferred to a ward with other women your OH does have to leave outside visiting hours but, and this was the deciding factor, unless there are strong medical reasons they let you go home with your partner and baby an hour or two after you give birth anyway. And if your unit is anything similar, then there shouldn't be any more risk of them keeping you in than of them transferring you to hospital from a home birth in any case..

Frankly I feel the same as you, if I was told I had to be left in hospital without my OH I would go absolutely mental.. make sure you make your wishes clear in your birth plan then it shouldn't be an issue if and when it comes to the time.

To be honest I'd have to be pretty much at death's door to consent to staying in, especially without my OH, I wouldn't want to be away from him or take the baby away from him in those early hours and I hate hospitals.. they'd have a job treating me either way!