How do you know if your husband is ready?

[LouiseB]

I'm soon to be TTC and to be honest my biggest fear is regarding my husband - i just don't know if he is ready and i don't want to be left holding the baby.

He says he is, but he doens't show an interest in anything.

He doesn't care for it's sex, doesn't care for names, doesn't care for room allocation, doesn't care for furniture and decoration - he doesn't seem to care about anything regarding the whole baby thing.

When i ask him if he is looking forward to being a daddy, he says yes and might make an effort to say he is looking forward to taking it camping and things but it's a bit more involved than that.

I don't know if this is just the typical man response and they need to see a baby before they kick into action.

How did you know?

 

[ShadowWolf]

I think i forced my OH into doing it, I know he's always wanted kids but he needed a kick up the arse to say "yes ok lets do it". When I ask him now if he's exited, he says yes. Nothing else, just yes. It annoys me some times but I know deep inside that he finds it hard to outwardly show enthusiasm about things, he never gets so exited about anything that he runs around the room like I do so it's just something that I'm having to learn to accept, which is hard when like today for example, a package arrived for me and it was the last of my terry nappies. I was so exited, pulled them open and started looking at them. To be fair they are only squares of cloth but to me, thats exiting! He just sat there and gave me the weirdest look ever! I've been the one doing all the baby shopping and i've built the nursery, he very rarely goes in there!

Bah, men. He will be exited when it gets here!
xxxx

 

[Piglet10]

i think ur expecting a little much from him...... i think women defo find it easier to get more excited poss cos its actually happening to them... i dont think it hits men till they get here lol and tbh most men are just ok with babies but i know john is a lot better with madison now he gets a response from her iykwim.... its like asking a man to get involved with plannin a wedding ... they dont really care what it looks like or how many layers is on the cake lol just as long as they get married.... am i rambling or making any sense at all lol?!?! dont worry hell be fine when baby gets here its not like hes not committed or anything xxx

 

[flexilexi394]

Hey! If it helps, my oh is very similar, he hasn't fully understood he's going to be a father yet I don't think. I'm just giving him time and stuff, as I do believe that they need time to understand it all. For us, we are the ones carrying bubba so we naturally feel a lot more close to our little ones, where as they don't get thst amazing bond going on. That's just what my experience is, and I'm sure all our other halfs will come round, even if it's when they see the baby!
Hope that gave you an idea of what people are experiencing! Good luck. Xxx

 

[LouiseB]

Hiya, thanks for the responses

I'm relieved it sounds typical for a man to be like that!

I feel like i'm coming to the point of no return and i really wish i had a crystal ball sometimes to see into the future and make sure things are a good idea.

Come to think of it Lisa, my husband didn't care about the wedding either... haha

 

[Sol]

Quite honestly until I got pregnant the other was not interested. I think he didn't want to get his hopes up but now her turns into a big puddle of mush in regular occasions particularly if he sees baby clothes lol

 

[Lilelephant]

My hubby was like that but when I feel pregnant he was so excited! Since the misscarriage he couldn't wait to start trying again, he said it made him realise how much he wants to be a daddy! Remember men don't always express themselves very well x

 

[Countrybumpkin]

My husband has been the opposite, he has wanted to be a Daddy for the last 3 years and will happily tell anyone that asked, I on the other hand was a little unsure, for sometime.

 

[Geminiblue]

My husband is Mr Practical and also remember men are Visual.... so until he's holding your child he may not actually show much excitment. My husband was texting his twin brother in abu dhabi while i was in labour you can imagine how impressed I was ha ha. he couldnt get excited about something he couldnt see and when he first saw/felt Jude move in my belly he was like, errr not sure if that is weired or cool?!?!?! says it all and I am still laughing as that is him all over. Remember we have our hormones and natural instinct to carry us through thats why we have these emotions to ensure we care for our child and protect. It will kick in, honestly I think my OH is just the best dad ever and he just adores Jude. Dont worry me darlin, you crack on and all will fall in place xxx