Having to tell people when you dont want too!

[Penstraze]

I am 12 weeks on friday and am getting married on saturday, I don't have my 12 week scan until next wednesday and didn't want to tell people until after the scan but because of the amount of people my MIL has told (dispite knowing I didn't want to tell people until after the 12 week scan but shes too excited and can't seem to stop telling people!)

Nearly everyone at wedding will know about my pregnancy and the people I haven't told myself wont know I don't want other people to know, so the few friends who are coming and dont know could find out by accident from someone else which we dont want! Now I feel I have to tell these people so they at least here from me but I'm scared about telling more people before my scan and tempting fate or something! I did have a scan at 8 weeks and everything was fine then, am I silly worrying about this?

Also did other people start telling everyone at 12 weeks or wait until after 12 week scan?

 

[Sherlock]

I think you have to do what is comfortable for you There is no right and wrong.

If you had a scan at 8 weeks and all was well, and you are feeling good now about this pregnancy, telling people a few days before the scan isn't going to hurt IMHO. If you've had no problems in the past few weeks and are happy to tell people on Saturday or whenever then do so. It'd be a lovely thing to share with them if you decide to.

As the cat is out of the bag for many now, its alas out of your hands in that department.

A good friend gave me a yardstick which I stuck to when telling people before our 12 week scan. Only tell the people who you would then be able to tell should something go wrong with the pregnancy. If you don't think you could face having to tell *everyone* that possible news, then don't tell everyone you are PG till you are ready. And of course, those would probably be people you would hope to trust.

Its crap your MIL has blabbed when you trusted her to remain quiet for a while. We didn't tell hubbys mother till we were 10 weeks and then told her on no uncertain terms to wait till we had had our 12 week scan before telling other people. She managed it as she understood the scan was our important point. Other than that we only told 4 people. I felt no desire to tell anyone else and even now, some people still don't know until they see me in the street.

I should mention our 12 week scan was at 11+3, so not even 12 weeks. Your scan is going to be 12+5 We told other people at 11+4 then. MIL told everyone she could think of back home in Australia at that point. Including her entire school in assembly that morning, of which OH's half brother is a pupil. He heard about the pregnancy at school from her Went home and told OH's Dad who we had yet to phone with the news because of the time difference

 

[MissyRee]

Congrats on getting married saturday & good luck with your scan!! I have the same problem ive told my main family and OH's and just a couple of close friends but people cant seem to help telling others about it, even people i dont know! I feel when ive had my 12 week scan and am ready to tell everyone there will be no one left to tell at this rate lol!

 

[clarey]

Dont worry about tempting fate, a lot of people get superstitious about telling anyone before the 12 week scan, but since its out of your hands maybe your wedding would be a nice time to tell people anyway?
Your OH could make a comment in his speech about the cat being out of the bag thanks to your overexcited MIL but you want to share your exciting news on such a happy occasion? At least noone will be put out that you hadnt already told them if they think you were saving the news for the wedding?

Personally I didnt tell many people early on but when I had a couple of bleeds and got scared I realised I didnt want the first anyone knew of my pregnancy was that it had ended when we are so happy about it, and if the worst happened at least everyone would be aware and supportive.

Good luck and dont let worrying about this ruin your special day!

 

[dannii87]

I think you have to do what is comfortable for you There is no right and wrong.

If you had a scan at 8 weeks and all was well, and you are feeling good now about this pregnancy, telling people a few days before the scan isn't going to hurt IMHO. If you've had no problems in the past few weeks and are happy to tell people on Saturday or whenever then do so. It'd be a lovely thing to share with them if you decide to.

I told everyone straight away, and I agree, what a lovely day to tell everyone, you could announce it in the speech at the reception, that way, alcohol hasn't flowed enough for people to blurt (hopefully!)

Also, it'll be on video you announcing it, what a lovely keepsake!!

If you have had no worries or concerns about LO's health, then it sounds as though baby is progressing perfectly

Good luck on Saturday! How exciting! You'll definitely have to post pics of your lovely day. Hope the weather holds out for you too

xxx

 

[Mildly]

Congratulations for your wedding, hope you have a brilliant day

Telling people is so difficult, I waited until after our scan before telling family and colleagues. I have to admit I'm still not really in the mood for telling people - I'm getting fed up with advice already

However your wedding is a lovely time to tell people and I'm sure in the end, good friends wouldn't mind how they were told and would just be happy for you. I definitely wouldn't stress about it in case it ruins your big day

 

[Andrianne]

Try not to stress too much about it hun.

Congratulations on your wedding and i hope you have a wondeful day! Tell us all about it when you come back

xx

 

[Penstraze]

Thanks everyone feel beter about it now! Is it bad that im looking forward to 12 week scan as much as my wedding exciting week cant wait!!!