Funny stories

[moonpiesb]

Let's all tell a funny story we know......



I thought this was the funniest story......I just had to share it.

A man that I work with told us that when his son was in Kindergarten they had a show and tell day every week. One morning as he was driving his son to school he remembered (THANK GOD) that it was show and tell day and told his son that he was sorry that he had forgotten to get him something to take to school with him that day to show off. His son told him not to worry about it because he had remembered and had brought a telescope (pointing to his back pack). The man I work with was a bit confused since he knew that no-one in their house owned a telescope (and he certainly didn't see how one could fit in the little boys back pack). So he asked his son where he found the telescope. His son looked at him and told him in the bathroom. The man then asked to see the "telescope". When the little boy pulled it out of his back it was a tampon dispenser!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you imagine the embarrassment his mom (and dad) would have endured had the dad not just happened to remember it was show and tell day????? This is a TRUE story..... And I guess the moral of this story is not to ever forget about show and tell or there is no telling what might get shown and told!!!!!!!!!

 

[Helen]

OK, here's something that happened to me the other week...

Went to see REM in Loch Lomond, an outdoor gig. It was a fab day, nice n warm with 4 support acts so me and the fella were really enjoying chilling out all afternoon.

Decided to go get a coffee from one of them burger vans they have at gigs (must've been desperate!). So, I carefully picked my way through tons of people, ordered the coffee and then wobbled over to where the milk and sugar were. The coffee was really strong cos it took 3 of those silly little foil-lidded pots of milk to even begin to lighten it. Put a generous amount of sugar in and wobbled my way back through all the people to where he was sat waiting for me to return.

Well, it was the worst coffee I have ever had and strangely salty tasting. Hmmm...come to think of it, it was also strangely beefy tasting.... Yup, I'd ended up with Bovril and then put milk and sugar in it.

Fella says that the moral of the story is to smell it before you put the milk and sugar in. I say the moral is, send him next time!!!!

 

[moonpiesb]

I don't know what Bovril is, but it sounds disgusting with milk and sugar....lol

 

[minikins]

Bless Helen !!

Since being pg, I have done many stupid things like putting milk in with the food cans in the cupboard and new cans in the fridge!

My mind is not what it used to be !

 

[Viper]

Helen, I loved the Bovril story. I can't believe you drank it. Yuck, I can just imagine . . .

Hope any of you pregnant ladies aren't offended by this joke, but here goes.

A heavily pregnant young woman rings her mam.

Daughter - "Mam, me waters just droke"

Mam - "Where ya ringing from?"

Daughter - "From me minge to me ankles."

Obviously, you can change 'minge' to a local word used in your area. (I really hate that word). But you get the general idea

 

[Viper]

That should read 'broke' not 'droke'. I get worse by the day

 

[Lou]

Thats pretty rank lol

 

[moonpiesb]

Too funny!!!!!!!!!

 

lol