Fuming!

[x_larlybelle_x]

Still can't believe it! This happened last week and I've been keepin it inside but I can't anymore!

The day after we announce to family we are pregnant, my brother announces his gf is also pregnant! The have only been together 5 months and it was "planned"!!! She tested last Monday, the day she was due, and it came back positive. That means she is about 4/5 weeks behind me.

I'm so angry.

All I keep thinkin is my poor baby, who we have waited over 2 years to fall pregnant with, is gonna b overshadowed by it's cousin when it's only weeks old as it's cousin will be younger. I keep thinkin my baby isn't gonna get the attention it deserves.

My mum has spoken to me and said she is disappointed wih my bro, they have only been together 5 months, they don't live together, neither of them have jobs, she already has a child who only turned 1 in march. My bro already has a daughter who has just turned 2. Her mum chucked her out as she is furious with them.

My mum has reassured me (And deep down I know this is true) that my baby wont b overshadowed as it's a much awaited for baby. Me m DH have been together 6 years, married for 4 and tryin for a baby for over 2 years. The day we had the early scan (8wks) we were due to be given clomid or referred for ivf, dependent on my dh's results.

My mum said if anythin it will be their baby that is overshadowed, as everyone is disappointed with them, and everyone knows how long we have been trying. But even that makes me feel bad. And what if I'm late, and she is early and our babies r born around the same time?

I know I have a lot of hormones flyin round, but I'm either pissed off with them for stealin my babies attention or feel sorry for them if my baby gets all the attention.

Bit of a rant, but I needed to get it out!

Sorry girls!

 

[Jaxx01]

I don't know what to say to this other than I'm sure neither baby would be overshadowed?? They are beautiful babies both being welcomed intoi the world, not a possesion being shown off?? I don't want to sound harsh, that's not my intention but if its a long awaited for babu shouldn't you be concentrating on that other than what other people may think or do when the time comes? X

 

[Hope81]

The baby needs nth more than it's parents attention and love. 1000000 babies can be born the same day as mine but that will not change how much I love it. Who cares what others think??? As about your brothers baby, every each baby I a little miracle, planned or unplanned and deserves to be loved

 

[sammi7]

As long as you and your partner shower your baby with love then anyone one else who give your baby attention and love then thats a bonus. i agree with jaxx01, babies arent a possession. Every baby does deserve love so its not a competition for these babies.

 

[hugsy]

Oh I completly know where your comming from, My sis in law done the same thing when we got engaged she went and got engaged a month later and when we let slip that we had been trying she anounced she was going to too, Im pregnant and shes not though ( so far) but I can imagin how furiated you are feeling, when you have had such a long journey to get where you are now i would feel like she was steeling my thunder big time, but I do think mothers fuss more over daughters babys than sons. Im very hormonal today and its making me mad thinkin about my sis in law now too hehehe

 

[TiffanyJaynexo]

I understand where you are coming from but like the above posts I don't think any baby will be overshadowed and I don't think that's really fair that a baby, who didn't ask to come into this world or not, would get overshadowed. Everyone can be disappointed in them, and hey they might not even last as a couple, but nobody should overshadow their child, and I don't see any reason why your baby would be overshadowed either

Let the dust settle and just see how things go, it's still early days yet. Enjoy your pregnancy! xxx

 

[Pickledonions]

Now see...this is a very emotive subject and I actually had a similar experience-ish. We told dh family at 6 weeks.....3 weeks later my sister in law phoned and said she was now 6 weeks pregnant. Now at first Iw as really angry. they know we were waiting for IVF etc and that we were very lucky with baby bear. But then I realised something.....it makes no odds. This is my baby, its gonna have a cute little cousin and its gonna be fab to have someone to talk to abut the experience. But my initail thoughts were the same as you. I think a bit of its the hormones tho.

 

[hesty14]

I do fully understand where you are coming from and had a simliar experiance myself which got turned around in a horrid way.

When I was pregnant with my angel a very close family member announed that his wife was expecting as well and she was two weeks before me. This family member has always been more like a brother to me and like a son to my Mum so at first I was really annoyed but then realised that there is plenty of room in the family for two babies and that it will be nice for my baby to have a cousin of a similar age as I'm a only child and there is no hope fo DH sister having a baby anytime soon.

As I then lost my angel which then has overshadowed her pregnancy as no one would talk about babies when I was their etc.

Now I am pregnant again it has further overshadowed her as my family are saying how special my baby is as we have been though a tough time to get one etc.

I am in no way belittling your feelings as I have experianced them all myself, but think about your bro and his girlfriend and the fact that they are getting negative reactions to something that they are clearly happy about.

x

 

[l_maclean]

I can see why your feeling frustrated. But try and see some of the positives - you'll have someone going through the same as you and when both bundles of joy arrive - they'll have a ready made playmate. I have loads of cousins - and always hated the fact that i was the only one my age - the rest tended to come in 2s or 3s. lol.

Just remember that when you're LO arrives - you'll be so busy with it that you wont have time to worry about one or the other getting more attention.

xxx

 

[x_larlybelle_x]

I completely understand everyones comments, and agree wih them all. I think it was the initial shock when they announced it the day after us.

I know all babies r special and each will have a place in everyone's hearts and love.

Just mega hormonal atm and didn't know how I should feel or react. Now iv thought about it and it's sunk in, it's a blessin in disguise I think - jus didn't feel like it at the time!

 

[Jaxx01]

Hun hormones are a bitch!! The amount of times I've initially thought bad of something then thought it through and its not so bad lol everything will be fine hun you will have a gorgeous likkle baby xxx

 

[TashaWink]

I think thats great news! you'l have someone to go through it all with. Your little one will have a cousin the same age! they can grow and learn together! Personally i would love it!

Edit:Before i found out i was pregnant my sister had just had an ectopic pregnancy so we would have had one EXACTLY the same age!

 

[mustard]

My dad's 2 brothers both had daughters (one a month before me and one a month after). I don't think any of us felt less loved by our grandparents and the 3 of us have a wonderful close relationship with each other. Your LO will love having a cousin the same age. I do know where you are coming from though just as we started ttc I found out my brothers girlfriends sister was pregnant and I felt a slight twinge of jealousy that she had beaten me to it and we aren't even related, I hardly know the girl.

 

[l_maclean]

Thats good to hear your a bit more settled about it now Larybelle. These hormones can be a right pain in the ass sometimes. lol.

Plus - if you cant rant on here - where can you.

xxx