Feeling down in the dumps

[Spannagal]

Hi,
Quick recap of me. Aged 40 trying for first baby. Had first pregnancy ended in blighted ovum miscarriage in August. Now pregnant again -7 weeks along and feeling sick with worry today. Trying to be brave and positive but I just cant be bothered today.

Last time I had bloating, crampy, heartburn, metallic taste , achy boobs, feeling sickly but no spotting. Took paranoid pregnancy tests and all v positive. week 9 ...I had brown discharge which got me an early scan and then found out empty sac .

So now this time I have bloating and a bit crampy and twingy as before. None of the other symptoms except starting from week 6 to feel more intensely nauseous than last time. A few days after bfp so only 4 w ish had orange coloured one off spotting, quite a lot but didn't continue. Gp said might be settling in symptom or start of mc.. Then a couple of days of light brown sticky discharge, v small amount. Petered out. Then week 5 the brown sticky discharge returned for a couple of days then went again. I have done pregnancy tests again stupidly as proved nothing last time but... All dark quick 2nd lines..
I had lower backache around these times which has gone, well had, until today...
On Friday I went walking for a few miles and afterwards I was really paranoid it was a bad idea.
Spotting returned brown sticky again on Saturday and Sunday and today. Only when I wipe. It seems more persistent and watery this afternoon still only on tissue...and the backache is definitely here again. Like instant this afternoon and seems in sync with the slightly increased discharge. My lower back feels almost numb and in a knot.
I'm just terrified and telling myself Im going to miscarry and go through it all again.
Got flu jab tomorrow might ask nurse for advice as don't have midwife checking in appointment til next week. Im just feeling awful like in my soul. Stupid hormones also too but... Please help.. Anyone in the same boat? Did your midwife or doc advise?

 

[Blueclass]

Hi I mmc last year at 6 weeks they. I had no symptoms I was pregnant other than bloatedness. I'm now 9 weeks and still no symptoms other than bloatedness and sore boobs when I take my bra of in the eve. My boobs have not got bigger or anything. I had a early scan as I had pain turns out it was a cyst on my Overy and it had burst. That was 7 weeks and i saw a heart beat. Im now constantly worried that no signs is a bad sign and always wondering if I should go private. I may go next week as don't think I can wait till 12 weeks. Iv not had bleeding or spotting but I think you should just go to the epu. They are really good and will scan you if they think they should.
Hope it works out ok for you. Xx

 

[Loubalouba]

I have had backache and brown discharge throughout and I am now 10.5 weeks, I even had a very heavy bleed but scan showed everything fine.

I know it's tough but you don't have to keep worrying phone your EPU and tell them how worried you are and I am sure they will scan you for peace of mind and if they won't you could always go for a private scan?

It's a tough time I constantly worry! Xx good luck xx

 

[Spannagal]

I do feel better you saying that. I was feeling ok in myself until today's wobble despite the spotting etc. Just thought spotting and backache not a good combo and actually my backache is really unpleasant. Im leaning on a hot water bottle at mo.
Have you felt cold at all? Ive been feeling tingly cold for days now, like when you have a cold and you have that inner shiver like a draught on you. Or if I do heat up I feel too hot and then all sickly.
I know I just have to sit tight and what will be will be. My 12w point is 10 days before Christmas so I do worry if it all goes wrong again Im going to ruin everyone's festivities. It would be better to know the worst now and get it over with. And my partners sister in law is due no2 just after Christmas. I think its all getting on top of me .

 

[Siskin]

Just want to sympathise. It's such a worrying time. I had terrible nausea from 6-9 weeks, now I'm in a similar boat to Blueclass in that my symptoms have vanished and apart from very slightly sore boobs I feel fine. I also think I will have to get an early scan as I can't wait till my planned one at nearly 13 weeks. With regards to the backache, I have had this on and off since about week 5, sometimes quite severe (having to writhe around on couch to get comfy lying down) and I honestly don't think it means anything good/bad either way, it's just one of those symptoms that people get.

I can totally understand why you're so worried given your previous experiences, and the spotting (while it obviously doesn't mean anything in itself, loads of people have spotting) just means you are constantly aware of it and you probably never get a break from thinking about it. I think walking sounds like a great idea to be honest, and it won't make any difference to anything at this early stage. If anything it will hopefully make you feel better in yourself - I always find that a walk picks me up even if I'm feeling really awful before.

Your hormones won't be helping - at 7 weeks I was utterly, utterly miserable and crying all the time, worried about everything (still am worried to be honest!) and I think for some of us that is just par for the course. Doesn't make it any easier though.

Is there talk of you getting an early scan this time?

 

[mrs_z]

Just wanted to say I share your worries! Had spotting from week 9 that finally stopped just before week 13, and it kept worrying me, even after seeing that baby was fine. Community midwife, midwife at the hospital, and GP weren't worried at all - I guess despite all tales on the internet, light spotting is a lot more common than people think, and also doesn't always have to lead to the worst.

 

[Spannagal]

Thanks so much ladies.Your replies mean a lot. Im in the limbo stage waiting to check in with the midwife on the 18th. Googling can be a devil in disguise of course. I might run my worries past the nurse doing my flu jab tomorrow and see what advice she can give re scans etc. I just presumed not a lot to see at 7 weeks really. My gp is lovely. When I told her I was pregnant I asked if I could have an early scan due to mc, she said no and they take a lot of factors into account before they do it and actually she said if too early and no heartbeat it can upset you even more just because too early. Having said that as I have now had spotting I may be offered something earlier? Last time my gp rang the epu for me and just based on the spotting at 9 weeks I was given a scan so maybe...

 

[lisa1985]

I had a mc at 10 weeks in 2013, I finally became pregnant again in april this year, at around 6/7weeks I had bad pains in my ovaries so dr did send me to epu for a scan, luckily everything was fine. If you are having brown discharge then really they should send you, but would be better to go after 6-7 weeks so that you can see a heartbeat, otherwise you will come away stressed! Hope it all works out for you, can totally sympathise with the way you are feeling. xx

 

[Blueclass]

Does your epu not have walk in clinic? Mine is walk in so you can just turn up and get a scan. Xx

 

[Elfs Mummy]

I'd call the epu yourself and explain the situation I self referred to the epu and am having a scan with them on Monday when I should be 6 plus 4 I hope :/ xx

 

[Siskin]

I agree with the others, if there are no existing plans for an early scan I think it's totally reasonable to self-refer to the EPU (if you can) or failing that see your GP again. I am not well-versed in these things (it's my first pregnancy) but I imagine if you're spotting the docs would be happy to arrange a scan.

 

[Spannagal]

I spoke to gp this morning. She's squeezed me in to see her this morning as they're fully booked. See what she suggests ...

 

[Spannagal]

Got an early scan for Thursday. Can't come soon enough now but very scared.

 

[Blueclass]

Iv got a private one on Sunday. I'm pretty scared too. People say I should be happy I have no signs but to me I'd rather have them. Would make me feel the pregnancy is going well.
Hope yours goes ok. X

 

[Spannagal]

With symptoms - either none or plenty it seems you can't win eh? Good luck with your scan too x

 

[Elleyoung777]

Hello.
I am just hopping around and dropped in on your post, can't sleep due too the worst acid reflux/heartburn! Hope you don't mind.

I am now 28 weeks and touch wood things seem to be going good but it hasn't been an easy ride. Thought perhaps I could share my story in hope to ease your mind.

I found out I was pregnant at about 4 weeks. I didn't feel pregnant at all. I have always had irregular periods and was diagnosed with pcos when 14. My OH just had a hunch and sure enough he was right.

The week later I had brown watery spotting, got booked in at the early scan place and there was a tiny heart beat. The best thing I've ever seen I think. Then at 14 weeks while out walking I had a big bleed. I thought I had lost the baby. I spent the night in hospital after losing so much blood and they used a Doppler in the morning and found her heartbeat. I continued too bleed/brown spot right up until my 20 weeks scan. Still no reall pregnancy symptoms apart from sicky and tired but that could've been stress. 20 weeks saw we were having a baby girl. Had a growth scan today at 28 and she is already 3lbs!

Stay positive and don't give up on your little miracle. Many doctors have told me 'they are tougher than you think'.

Good luck with your scan.

 

[Spannagal]

Thanks and all the very best for you and baby x

 

[Spannagal]

Just to let fellow forumers know. My scan went well. !!!!! The sonographer got the heartbeat straight away. Everything is as it should be and my dates are pretty spot on. The nurse explained all the possible reasons for the bleeding and to keep an eye on things obviously. " Its not normal but common." There are no words to describe seeing the little berry 'baby' on the screen for the first time as nothing last time. I cried happy tears. I am floating. I know I won't relax properly until 12w but this is a great positive start for us.Good luck to anyone in same position is me ...its horrible. The hospital sister said 10 years had lifted off me from going into the scan room and coming out.. I just keep staring at the photos !!

 

[Loubalouba]

That's great Hun I know that feeling!! It's such a weight lifted! Enjoy it now xx